Hi, I'm new here. I just need some1 else's view on this:
My husband and are in our late twenties and have been married for 4 years, we have a 1 yr old daughter and another baby on the way. We lead the young adults in our church. And about a year ago (when my daughter was born) a young woman started coming along to our youth, she's in her mid-twenties.
My husband exchanged numbers to keep in touch with the woman, and invite her to our events etc. and almost immediately I noticed the text messages, Facebook conversations etc between them were quite flirty, and when they would meet in person, they would laugh in front of me and the rest of our group about things that only the 2 of them knew about (very innocent stuff, maybe things that were discussed in texts etc.)
To cut a long story short, I told him I didn't trust the girl. I got a bad feeling about her. I asked him not to talk to her as much on Facebook and texts, and he agreed.
Over the past year there have been a few incidents involving the 2 of them. Eg. We took the group on a missions trip in summer, and we took our daughter too, my husband didn't help me at all, and every time I would be looking for him, he would be with this young woman again (including sitting on the beach at midnight with her alone). Again I confronted him about it and he said it wouldn't happen again.
Then yesterday, I was in the shop she works in and when she was serving me, she told me (in front of all the customers) "I woke up to lovely texts from ur husband this morning" she went on to talk about how they had such fun conversations all the time etc. I felt totally humiliated in front of everyone.
So when I got home, I checked his phone - no messages! Eventually, he admitted that he does text her, and he had deleted the messages.
I don't know how to feel about this. I feel like a fool. I try to be the best wife, always keep myself looking good, and I'm always here for my husband, and I thought we had a good relationship.
Now I'm just so hurt. I would never do what he has done, and I don't understand why he would have this secret relationship, especially since he knows how I feel about this girl. He has a wife, daughter, and baby on the way and I feel like we mean nothing to him.
I don't know what to do now?