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As I and others have said, your posts are hard to make sense of because you don't use sentences or much punctuation. But from what I can get out of them.....

Your husband has diabetes which is causing him to have ED. He most likely has no sex drive and that's why he does not want sex. It's like not being hungry and someone wants you to eat a big meal... ugh.

Plus, he's passive aggressive. Most people who withhold sex are doing it as a passive aggressive way to punish their spouse.

He is playing mean games with you instead of dealing with the issues head on. It takes two of play passive aggressive games. If you stop playing your part in them, he will not be able to continue. For example, if you stop bugging him for sex, he cannot use withholding sex to punish you.

He did not say anything about you moving to another room because he is pleased that you moved to another room. That way he does not have to deal with you when you are in the other room. It's a win for him. Being passive aggressive, he could not come right out and tell you that he wants you to disappear. But he won by driving you nuts until you moved to another room.

If you want to break the dynamics of your marriage to fix it, read the book "Divorce Busting" and pay special attention to the chapter on changing the environment. If you do this, give it no more than 6 months. If things are greatly improved in 6 months, file for divorce.

If you are done with your marriage, file for divorce. This is no way to live.
 

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Also, why would a guy who has diabetes eat food from McDonalds? It's a diabetic's nightmare unless he throws out the buns, the fries, etc.
A man with diabetes wants sex, probably very very badly indeed.

But if he can't get a good erection, or comes too early, as a result of his floppy penis, he will feel too ashamed to even attempt sex. Especially if his wife might have made a remark like: "Don't start what you can't finish" or "Why are you such an arse?" (for example.)

And a visit to McDonald's isn't too bad. They have salads and fresh fruit... and all the normal foods that stop you feeling like a such a ****ing sickly freak. :(

Phew! Sorry! that all just sort of bubbled out.:eek:
 

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A man with diabetes wants sex, probably very very badly indeed.

But if he can't get a good erection, or comes too early, as a result of his floppy penis, he will feel too ashamed to even attempt sex. Especially if his wife might have made a remark like: "Don't start what you can't finish" or "Why are you such an arse?" (for example.)
That's a good point. If this is what he is going through and his wife is not empathetic, then he would shut down.

And a visit to McDonald's isn't too bad. They have salads and fresh fruit... and all the normal foods that stop you feeling like a such a ****ing sickly freak.

Phew! Sorry! that all just sort of bubbled out.:eek:
Yea, makes sense.
 

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That's a good point. If this is what he is going through and his wife is not empathetic, then he would shut down.



Yea, makes sense.
And I don't supersize my meals any more. :)
 

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Is it reasonable to dissolve a marriage over a floppy penis? It’s not a trick question, I’m genuinely curious. And a bit scared (off to do some penis exercises...)


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Is it reasonable to dissolve a marriage over a floppy penis? It’s not a trick question, I’m genuinely curious. And a bit scared (off to do some penis exercises...)
Is it reasonable to dissolve a marriage over no sex? It seems that many here advocate for divorce when this occurs.
 

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Is it reasonable to dissolve a marriage over a floppy penis? It’s not a trick question, I’m genuinely curious. And a bit scared (off to do some penis exercises...)
High blood pressure and then a side effect of my BP med gave ED. It was horrible and I was ready to set her free. It didn't come to that, an RX did the trick for me.
 

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Is it reasonable to dissolve a marriage over a floppy penis? It’s not a trick question, I’m genuinely curious. And a bit scared (off to do some penis exercises...)


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I think most here would give the same response as they do to all the men who complain about frigid/unresponsive wives or otherwise sexless marriages. This is not a black/white question.

Is this just a lack of desire for your partner or is there a legitimate (physical or mental) health reason for the lack of responsiveness? If there is a health reason, what is the partner doing to rectify it? Does the partner care enough to bring out all the stops to fix the situation?

If yes, then giv'em some time, love, and support. If not, then bail.
 

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I dont get how his response to I am moving out of our bedroom is to say nothing to just have no response at all i just dont get it
To me, it sounds like you've both checked out, and while it's hard to get checked back in, it can be done. Have you thought about couples counselling? This forum here is also a really good sounding board. It helped me through my own separation, and eventual divorce.
 

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I finally found @Rejectedliver 's story. It's good to get to know where she is coming from. I'm also a type 2 diabetic. And have degrading ED. Men at this age are prone to a nasty combination of medical conditions. Diabetes, Overweight, Low testosterone, and High blood pressure. Each one contributes to the others. Low Testosterone makes men grouchy and irritable, or as you say an Arse.

My doctor is an endocrinologist and treats the conditions simultaneously. I think it would be very helpful for your husband.

Also quite frankly, a person with low sex drive is not going to be interested in talking to his doctor about ED. You can't threaten a low Drive person with moving out of the room, it's a relief to them. Or at least that's what my wife says.

Also I recommend some shopping at Tantusinc.com You will be able to think more clearly after a bit of relief.
 

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Discussion Starter #55
Ty everyone I am sorry i dont use pu ctuation . Have been very patient withhim and i am empatbeti but the thought of never having sex again or feel8ng him is so sad to me i am greiving the loss of our sex life .He really is a very good person and i do love him . BUT the thought of no intimacy of any sort with him is very difficult i am so sad . He really isnt an arse . I dont pressure him I have really tried hard through all the rejection when i have approached him .I understand he suffers from great anxiety and loss of self esteem and his loss of libido and not being able to enjoy sex anymore .I dont approach him anymore i try and be as non sexually threatening but it is very difficult so its like if he holds my hand it doesnt progress to anything more than that - its really hard for him i really do understand BUT is this a deal breaker ??
 

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Discussion Starter #57
I am happy to listen to any advice -i think ir right something is very off in this marriage I really dont want to never have sex again -
Is it reasonable to dissolve a marriage over a floppy penis? It’s not a trick question, I’m genuinely curious. And a bit scared (off to do some penis exercises...)


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Its dammm sad
 
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