I've posted on her before, but need some direction. I busted my husband texting a woman (who he works with and continues to work with) approximately 2 1/2 yrs ago. I pulled telephone bills and found 1000+ texts per month....When confronted, he said they were just friends. I called the other woman...same story...they were just friends. He said he quit texting, but found him on his ipod touch texting her again as he downloaded a free texting application (2 years ago). He said he doesn't know what he is doing, he is a mess....He starts not coming home at night, saying he doesn't know what he wants, I need to mind my own business, quit digging around, he gets his own bank account, his own phone account, etc. He goes out and says that it's none of my business where he goes or states that he is with one of his buddies. We live like this for the last 1 3/4 years. I am in MC for the entire time trying to figure out what to do. When confronted, he says that he has never cheated on me, etc....He does state he has feelings for her, but is confused. Well, about two months ago, he did not come home one night and I decided to drive to the OW house and his car was there at 7AM. I pound on the door, nobody comes to the door. I then kicked him out of our house. He only came back 2 weeks ago to get some stuff. He continues to pay the mortgage, etc...when he came around two weeks ago we got into a huge discussion and he confessed to cheating on me with the OW. Tells me he has been sleeping with her for over a year. I remain unemotional about it as I've known this and dealt with my emotions. He is all emotional.....is a wreck....says he is afraid that he will never have me again, that he believes I am the only person who understands him and that he can talk to, the other woman is immature (11 years younger). She fought with him all of the time, he is done with her, he doesn't respect her, etc....He doesn't ask to come back home and I do not invite him. I sent him an email stating that in order for him to move back into the house that he 1.) He needs to get individual counseling 2.) We need to attend MC for an extended period of time 3.) He needs to apologize in person to my whole family 4.) He needs to create transparency with everything...phone, accounts, email, etc....this is just a start. I tell him via email to just think about it and that he does not need to respond to my email. It's been two weeks and we have texted a couple of times about business stuff (filing taxes, etc...) but not one word on his end about my email or making the decision to try to see if we can work on the relationship. Wouldn't you think he would be communicating more with me over the past two weeks if he wanted to push his way back in? I think I am going to invite him over and ask him what he would like to do and if he still doesn't know then I will file for divorce. I'm at the point where the ultimatum needs to happen and then move forward in either direction...but I'm having so much trouble ending this whole thing. I don't get it as he has been so horrible. Thoughts?