Nomads, I have a severely unique situation. However, my old counselors both have said its a combination of MLC, 7 year itch and the fact we just got together way too young basically.
I'm battling mine. We were great until the teens came into play. 3.5 months ago now. Wife cheated after having all this new attention from the younger crowd. Now is saying she's not been happy for years and wanted out yada yada.
Together for 11, married for 6. When we married, we came out of a rough spell... which I thought was because of her being 17 when we got together. She was BARELY 17. I was in my 20's. However, we fell for each other and made a lot of great memories. We've had a wonderful life.
Um. Sure, I been bad too. As most of us have, but I wasn't phys. abusive, no addictions or anything. Never cheated.
IF THIS HAS anything to do with the "itch" I don't know what to say. Ehh... since we're still battling it, I can tell you, almost 4 months later since the boys' attention grabbed a hold of my wife, with a very DEAD AND HATING kind of period in between, I can say my wife is warming up. The old group of friends are gone. However she still says she doesn't want me, doesn't want to feel "Trapped" and wants to be "free" (I used the word Free, not her) but now is touching me, Still saying "I love you" etc. We moved out of the old place (had to, lived onsite of the business) 0
I'm going to have to say there's not a lot you can do to battle it. Not from my perspective really. My situation I think is calling for patience. Ride out the wave, unfortunatley I'm almost to the point I think that I'm tired of waiting.
If I had to say anything as a tip, to always be concious of the marriage. I mean, don't get in the "Rut" and think everythings fine and forget about it. Just keep things in mind and don't get over paranoid, just be cautious and always... always make sure your partner is happy. And if they say "yes" ... Pretend they're not! Get that small gift you've been neglecting to get for them. Do that one thing that crossed your mind, surprise them. Make sure they know that you are always thinking of them. May not prevent a darn thing, but at least you'll knwo... you did what you could.
I'm sure thing will be fine. Keep your head up and don't worry too much, it's a killer.
