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How to rekindle that "spark"

2383 Views 4 Replies 5 Participants Last post by  Cyclist
So me and my husband have been together for a few years. But as the time has gone on with our share of ups and downs, that desire for him has gone down. Now... I find my husband to be sexy, handsome and I'm attracted to him but my desire for him isnt where it used to be. There has been cheating on his end but we have worked through it, and i have forgiven him but i guess that hurt is still there. You can forgive but you never really forget. I want my marriage to work. I love my husband very much. He's a great husband now, and a great father to our child. i just want to figure out how to rekindle that spark. Anyone ever been in this situation before? Sex is important in a happy marriage and i want to continue to please my husband but i want that desire to be natural. Any helpful advice is welcomed. Thanks in Advance!
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Open up to each other, take the time for your selves. Its amazing how much couples "talk" but dont say "anything". H and I learned that this is what we did. And when it came down to it we sat down and really talked abd got to know each other and what we wanted and didnt want.
I've been in your shoes in trying to rekindle an injured relationship.

First off view it as a fun challenge. While you have to put forth effort to make it work make it fun.

I like the book "his needs, her needs". It really helped me understand what my needs are and helped my girlfriend and I express our needs to each other. It was an eye opener to her how important a good sex life was to me and also how important other parts of our Needs are and how they all go together.

Next plan a date night. Maybe start every other week. Make a list together of the things you can do from just a movie or a coffee/book store to live music and a martini together.

You can also make a list of the sexy things you want to do together. Maybe a bit more adventurous stuff. Buy some toys, sex in new places, different rooms, in the car, etc.

The most important thing is to just do it. Just do some fun stuff and put forth the effort. You will see you both get closer together. The second thing is don't stop. Never never never stop. It's like working out.....consistency in your effort will really pay off.

Good luck and I hope you both have a blast!
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