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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
I'm looking for tips on getting my wife in the mood. We dont have alot of sex but when we do it's really great. I would like to try things to get her in the mood more often. Any tips will help

Thank you
 

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What type of woman is she? Does she enjoy the little luxuries like having a bath run for her?What would she do if she walked into your bedroom and you had candles lit and massage oil warmed?

"How to get wife in the mood" will get you a thousand answers and maybe only one or two will be the answer for how to get YOUR wife in the mood.

Tell more about her,please:)
 

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If you Google that question, you'll get an abundance of answers...read and select the ones you think may actually work.
 

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Discussion Starter · #7 ·
Well she loves to get a good massage. She is always worried about her hygiene. So if she showered first thing in the morning, sex that night could be out of the question. So maybe running her a bath would really get things going.
 

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It all depends on the women, but you say it's great so I'm guessing she puts effort into it, which shows she likes having sex, So I'd go for compliments, showing her a good time, setting the mood around the home, but in a nut shell attention and making her feel special. I'm a woman, and women love words!
 

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Well she loves to get a good massage. She is always worried about her hygiene. So if she showered first thing in the morning, sex that night could be out of the question. So maybe running her a bath would really get things going.
I'm thinking running her a bath then offering to wash her would be sexy:)

if she's self conscious about her body at all,do it in low light.


then afterward,use her favorite lotion all over...but do it slowly and compliment her different body parts "i love your sexy tummy baby...you have the cutest belly button" ;) sounds lame but trust me,that sh*t works!
 

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This might sound funny, but do some things that would normally be on her to do list, or get the house really clean.

This might not be true for her, but I'm always less relaxed when I see around me all the stuff that needs to get done.

And yes, then run her a bath if she is self conscious about her hygiene. Help her relax by taking away some to-dos, help her feel fresh and beautiful by letting her tend to her body, and I bet it'll make for a good night.
 

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If hygiene is an issue can you suggest a shower together at night?

Txt her during the day, a simple "Hi Babe" or whatever you want. Just to let her know you are thinking about her.

Do you two talk about sex and your sex life? If not can you? Talk to your wife, communication is the best tool you have.

My fave thing is just to always have sex in the air, a hug, a hand on the knee, silly in jokes about something we did in bed, showering, txting during the day etc.
Not so easy if you are coming from a place where this doesn't happen but for us this is how we live our daily lives so it is not a huge step to think that we will have sex pretty much every night we are together.
 
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Ask her to write down 5 things that give her lots of pleasure...and see how she answers it. This is a very broad question. That would be a great start....and then surprise her by doing them when she is not expecting them.
 

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good hygiene helps
totally agreed my w had told me that her friends don't like to have sex with their hubby because he don't bathe everyday. (come on basic hygiene!)

and for me to get my w in the mood, i just simply text (or writing on paper) on how sexy and desirable she was and lusted for her "body" in a perverted way.

after she reads the notes/text, i gradually touches her softly on her shoulders, her back, her breast and ultimately down under. By the time i gone to there she will be really wet

guess you know whats going to happen next then :rofl:
 

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Is she a a SAHM or does she go out to work?

When I was a SAHM I just wanted to get out of the house...away from the chores, kids, mummy-duties...
Being away (even for just the day or evening) helped me remember I was a wife as well as a mum.

When I was working away from home... I loved to have nights in with a warm bath together, massage and candles etc...
 

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It might help for you to understand that, depending on the woman, getting her in the mood may very well require heavy lifting done 48-72 hours in advance that has absolutely nothing to do with sex as you understand the word.

No amount of candles, massage oil, soft music, and sweet talking will undo the dirty dishes you left in the sink (again!) or the time you made her carry the garbage to the curb in the rain.
 

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My wife is a sucker for massage, to the point that I bought a massage table (inexpensive one on ebay works great). Even though we have been going through a dry spell, a massage gives the desired results about 75% of the time...She loves having her bottom rubbed, so when I stert rubbing her back she pushes her bottoms down herself....Mission accomplished......
 

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This is my personal view. I recently found out that my husband was having an affair. We are talking etc. One of the main things is that my husband wanted more sex than me. It is a big thing for him.

For me, I need to feel loved and wanted and the sex in my opinion will come naturally and will follow.. My husband just cannot see this. So the odd bunch of flowers (husband has brought flowers for me twice in 16 years).

Yes massage, candles, bath etc. But this is just out of the question. Too much effort for him to do any of this. So ... we are both frustrated and my husband has an affair ..

So just do small things .. I hope this makes sense?
 

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Sorry to read this itskaren.

It REALLY is the small things that are done often and with love that make the difference isn't it!

Not flowers on your birthday or valentines day

This goes for both sexes IMO.
 

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Would not it be GREAT if we did not have to manipulate other people to get what we want???

OK - the premise is that we should manipulate each other to accomplish our wants and needs..... OK, then why not prostitution - pay the fee, get the service - no manipulation there. Ah, but marriage is not prostitution...

Sure, you can massage, buy stuff, say stuff, etc.... but if it is all to manipulate another person to do what you want then .... maybe you need to rethink the situation.

If she only does stuff (says stuff) 'cause you made it happen then what kind of relationship do you really have???

Good Luck!
 

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Would not it be GREAT if we did not have to manipulate other people to get what we want???

OK - the premise is that we should manipulate each other to accomplish our wants and needs..... OK, then why not prostitution - pay the fee, get the service - no manipulation there. Ah, but marriage is not prostitution...

Sure, you can massage, buy stuff, say stuff, etc.... but if it is all to manipulate another person to do what you want then .... maybe you need to rethink the situation.

If she only does stuff (says stuff) 'cause you made it happen then what kind of relationship do you really have???

Good Luck!
Surely there's a difference between overt manipulation and just doing what is necessary to get your partner in the mood.

If I don't grease the skids during the week by showing affection, then I know when the weekend rolls around she won't feel sexual towards me. It's not a calculus of "has he checked off all of the boxes", but instead one of feeling disconnected, undesired, and unloved.

That's no more manipulation than putting gas in your car "manipulates" it into taking you to work in the morning.
 
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