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how to get my ex wife back,,

1619 Views 3 Replies 4 Participants Last post by  conflicted but in love
I don't know where to begin. I am in the military, and after one of one of my deployments I cheated. I don't know why I did it, I tried to hide it and I was so depress and ashamed over it I wanted to die. That was over 6 years a go, and after it all came out and we had work though all the ugly things that go along with it we stayed together. We had another child a daughter and I thought life was go in all the right directions.
Then I got deployed again in 09-10 and in Apl 2010 I called home and she told me she was done that it was over. We are divorced now and I have never stop loving her. We get along good and at time I even stay at the house with her and the kids. I stay on the couch of course, my son 7 fond a shoe box with all the letters and note's I have gave her over the last 3 years. I ask if we could start trying to work thing's out and just date each other to see if it would work. But she is seeing someone else and said not.. I steel love her and would like more than anything to get back with her and make are family whole. Anyone got any advice good or bad.. Thanks
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Yep, stop staying at the house and let her go. She's dating someone else now, and has totally moved on. You need to do the same. Sorry! :(
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There's NO GUARANTEE she'll EVER want you back, but if she does it will be:

1. Because you respect her and her decisions. If she is dating someone else now, let her go. There MAY be a chance in the future, but you being a pushy jack-azz NOW will NOT improve those chances.

2. Always show your EX-wife that you respect her as the mother of your children, as a good woman, as a wonderful person.

3. Be a supportive co-parent to your ex-wife. Be willing to go the extra mile to help her with the kids (pick-up early, drop off late, etc.)

4. Do NOT be her 'friend'. Do NOT be the shoulder she cries on about man troubles, etc. You're NOT HER GIRLFRIEND...you don't want to be put in the 'friend zone'.

5. Go about your business in a mature manner. Live your life as the kind of man she would admire. Say what you mean, do what you say. Get yourself in shape: physically, mentally, spiritually.

6. Be the best dad you can be to your kids! They deserve it.

If you do all of the above, it WILL MAKE you a more attractive partner/potential partner. SHE may never choose you again, BUT you WILL attract better/more stable/more mature partners who can help you and your children BUILD A GREAT LIFE...and that's better than you're doing now, yes?

Good luck! Make yourself a 1-, 3-, and 5-year plan to improve your life (write it down!), then LIVE IT!
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I'm going through somthing similar. First while what you did was bad, her seeing somone else probably when you two were still "ok" is just as wrong and if she is doing it and continues it its worse. Don't allow your self to feel bad. be happy your out. If after 6 years she can't forgive something that you 100% want to work though than shes not worth it.

Sorry it might not have been what you want to hear...
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