Was married 17 years, got the I don't love you talk almost 2 years ago, working on moving on, stbxh is dating his cousin (yes, first cousin, his mom and her dad are siblings), very hard to accept this but ... I have a question (and some venting) about holidays.
My son's BD is today. My stbxh was going to take him for dinner. I texted him at 5:20 pm to see if "she" was going". If not, I would have gone too. I figure, I'm the mom, shouldn't I be celebrating with him? Got a text 5 min. later from him saying he had hurt his back in the afternoon and asked if I could take our son out for supper. So, one question, does it sound suspicious that when he got a tricky question to answer he all of a sudden couldn't go out? He didn't even say anything to our son. I was the one who told him that his dad couldn't go out.
Another question, if "she" had any class, wouldn't "she" say "I will stay home, his mom should be with him on his BD"? Isn't it kind of ignorant that "she" doesn't think about this?
Another thing that really hurts is, my in-laws are coming from out of country for xmas. They want to see me, I want to see them, but "she' is going to be there. Why is it that the person who didn't want to end the marriage (me) is the one who is alone at xmas? I am going to work at a soup kitchen over the holidays so I don't wind up sitting at home having a pity party. But, it's so tough. Especially since I was always the one who did all of the work for holidays and stbxh couldn't care less about holidays.
And for those just starting the process and wondering how long it takes to get over the ex, I'm still working on it. I finally had the strength to tell him to stop calling me to talk, to stop saying he just wants to be friends (side note, this is the man who always said men and women can't be friends ... strange!), etc. Not that he listened, he just offered to buy my snowmobile permit. Problem is, I work with him so I do have to deal with him on some things.
Hadn't seen him for a few weeks - when I finally did I realized how fat he's getting. (This comment is just for venting purposes!!) I think I'm finally getting to the point where I see him for the as...le he is (his words) but there are times when I think I would take him back. I really hope I am close to the end of the roller coaster ride! Divorce will be happening any day now and I can't wait!! Even going to change my name (to my mom's maiden name, long story, totally different forum!)
Be strong everyone. Every day gone by is another day less of pain and closer to joy!!
