I have been wondering the same thing myself. I personally won't screw around on him, so I take matters into,my own hands.
Well, I started seeing someone shortly after separating, but I was very sure my marriage was over. But many people don't agree with that mindset. I think you really run a risk of complicating things, if reconciliation is on the table later.How about during seperation?
Read your 1st line above again. That should help you get through. And, yeah, you'll survive. I didn't think I could either, but then the Army sent me to Saudi for 7 months. Not a whole lot of ways to get in trouble over there.But I'd rather have nothing at all then to put up with her again. Still... I'm curious
Anyways, I don't know if I can survive a year seperation without finding a new woman on the side...
I survived years of total drought. I mean complete. I will NOT cheat, so that left only one relief - polishing the bayonetMy wife and I are in the sh-tter, so now it's a system shock of having sex multiple times a day to nothing at all with not much hope of reconciliation. But I'd rather have nothing at all then to put up with her again. Still... I'm curious
How did you guys survive for years at a time? Just the hand? How to handle the temptation of cheating especially when there's so many women out there waiting for love? Also if it is just the hand, is it just me, or have you guys noticed erection problems during intercourse with later dates after being too used to the hand? I suffered that during long draughts/fights with my wife, or STBXW whatever.
Anyways, I don't know if I can survive a year seperation without finding a new woman on the side in the meantime if my wife and I decide to call it quits. Stupid law, can't even divorce without seperation.
Thanks for posting this. This is what I'm working toward. I need to focus more on what I'm going to do. Tonight I will purchase the Married Man's Sex Life Primer. We'll see where it gets me.My sex life has been a work in progress for a majority of my marriage. I used to place all the blame on the face my wife is LD. Although that was still the primary cause, there was plenty I could be doing.
This site has been great for me. I have changed things about myself that I never really noticed I was doing. I took on some of the blame for our lack of sex. I become more assertive about our sex life. I didn't beat a dead horse, but I kept the topic on the forefront. I started doing the things again that I knew my wife liked.
We started branching out a little sexually. Experimented with some toys. Found a great one that helps her reach orgasm while we are having sex. Its amazing what regular orgasms will do for a woman's sex drive. it is also amazing how providing those orgasms, with help or not, take a load off...both literally and figuratively.
Our sexless periods depressed me. I felt sorry for myself and almost quit trying. I kept at it. Continued to try to make improvements. During our first pregnancy and after my child was born, there was a 15 month period of no sex. Through effort by both of us, woith me taking the lead, we are about once a week.
It sucked...but it can change and be worth it.