separated from my wife 18 months and we have already been through 12 months of counseling. we have two beautiful girls under 5 - they are my sunshine. i had an affair when our youngest was still yet born. belatedly, i gave up the affair and tried to move on before my youngest was born - making many drastic changes to my life. 2 years on my wife's hate is stronger than ever. finally, i am faced with a problem: how do i stick around for them when she openly outwardly hates me ? how long must i suffer this hatred ?
for a long time (now 2 years since i told her about the affair) - i stuck by close not letting my ideal of a future happy family go. i was a stay-at-home-dad during this time and these were some of the best months of my life. but she hated and hated and hated. then the money that i had saved (i was previously a high-exec) started to dry up because she couldn't earn enough to make ends meet. i took a job offer in a different city and according to her there was no option to come with me. i miss my sunshine - and they don't understand, with the eldest repeatedly saying: "why is daddy coming home ?" and talking about going on an aeroplane to see her friends..,
part of me just wishes my wife would just go and leave us in peace. i am confident i would be able to manage well on my own as a single dad and hold down a steady job as well. - i know that sounds bad because i made the cardinal sin or whatever, but she is insane - its been two years ! she is the first to admit she wasn't exactly in to marriage from the beginning anyway - come to think of it i can't remember a time not being hated by my wife.
why do women get the power to choose; who do i love ? should i work, or shouldn't i ? why do men cop all the blame ? when all they want is a women that loves them, supports them and sticks by them and to have quality time to spend with his children.
kids listen in - a message from a loving father in-absent: its hard, nigh impossible to be a present father in a hateful marriage. i promise you i will try my best to exercise presence when i am around. you both, my beloved need to eat need an education so i won't be present very often as i need to work to provide these things for you. you'll likely go through anger and possibly hate me by the time your a teenager for not being around, (especially if you get brainwashed by all rubbish women speak about men) and that is ok, believe me i understand.. the bitter weight of women-speak is like dragging a ten-tonne-trailer around a parking lot. but please understand why i left, i left becuase it was up to me to provide and i left because i could not handle your mother's hate of me. i didn't take you with me because mother's are sacred and untouchable. hopefully you will have at least a comfortable childhood with the money i am providing to your mother, and if we are lucky you will have my presence from time to time and know your dad is someone you can always go to. that's the best i can do.
for a long time (now 2 years since i told her about the affair) - i stuck by close not letting my ideal of a future happy family go. i was a stay-at-home-dad during this time and these were some of the best months of my life. but she hated and hated and hated. then the money that i had saved (i was previously a high-exec) started to dry up because she couldn't earn enough to make ends meet. i took a job offer in a different city and according to her there was no option to come with me. i miss my sunshine - and they don't understand, with the eldest repeatedly saying: "why is daddy coming home ?" and talking about going on an aeroplane to see her friends..,
part of me just wishes my wife would just go and leave us in peace. i am confident i would be able to manage well on my own as a single dad and hold down a steady job as well. - i know that sounds bad because i made the cardinal sin or whatever, but she is insane - its been two years ! she is the first to admit she wasn't exactly in to marriage from the beginning anyway - come to think of it i can't remember a time not being hated by my wife.
why do women get the power to choose; who do i love ? should i work, or shouldn't i ? why do men cop all the blame ? when all they want is a women that loves them, supports them and sticks by them and to have quality time to spend with his children.
kids listen in - a message from a loving father in-absent: its hard, nigh impossible to be a present father in a hateful marriage. i promise you i will try my best to exercise presence when i am around. you both, my beloved need to eat need an education so i won't be present very often as i need to work to provide these things for you. you'll likely go through anger and possibly hate me by the time your a teenager for not being around, (especially if you get brainwashed by all rubbish women speak about men) and that is ok, believe me i understand.. the bitter weight of women-speak is like dragging a ten-tonne-trailer around a parking lot. but please understand why i left, i left becuase it was up to me to provide and i left because i could not handle your mother's hate of me. i didn't take you with me because mother's are sacred and untouchable. hopefully you will have at least a comfortable childhood with the money i am providing to your mother, and if we are lucky you will have my presence from time to time and know your dad is someone you can always go to. that's the best i can do.