In your case, alimony would help, the more the better. She'll need it for therapy. Also you should move far, far, away. And what's this about doing things and saying things to make her make the decision...you know that's sociopathic, right? Grow up and find your b*lls and speak up for what's not working for you. Holy cr*p, I can see why the marriage doesn't work, you're unable to advocate for any of your needs, or to have an honest discussion with your own spouse...