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You have a weird relationship with your wife, atleast on some level;.

I haven't said this before but you did not deal with her affair properly..She has some weird control over you..Maybe the good outweighs the bad.And you blame all the bad on her Aspergers
 

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When my wife had her affair, I was broken-hearted.
But I didn't cry.
When I had my stupid revenge affair
I lost it and sobbed my heart out.
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You cried because you broke a vow you said you would never break. You betrayed yourself also, not just your wife. You gave a piece of your soul away when you cheated. When she cheated all she did was betray you but you still had your dignity and honor (or whatever you want to call it).
 

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Only you can truly know the answer to this.

It is deep inside you. Without truly letting yourself come out, you will not know.
 

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I sobbed my eyes out when I was thinking of my life being over.


However when it was about her affair I cried, in anger.

Tears have always been tied into my anger personally.

I'll get so pissed and then they won't stop flowing which sucks when I'm mad about someone whose trying to step to me.

Makes me look like a crying b!tch at the times where I'm not throwing punches. :mad:
 

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I sobbed my eyes out when I was thinking of my life being over.


However when it was about her affair I cried, in anger.

Tears have always been tied into my anger personally.

I'll get so pissed and then they won't stop flowing which sucks when I'm mad about someone whose trying to step to me.

Makes me look like a crying b!tch at the times where I'm not throwing punches. :mad:
Kasler, I learned long ago that you never want to fight a guy who's crying because you'll get the worst ass-kicking of your life.
 

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Total truth Count!!!

I told my IC last week I am finished crying. Since the huge blowout that played out live at the Reconciliation thread on 8/30. I don't think I have any more tears to spare.
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I've cried,a lot sometimes.
While she was knee deep in her affair I broke down a couple times and cried in front of her only to have her tell me I was unmanly.
Last night I cried when she fell asleep on the couch.
It was as close as I can get to crying in front of her,it kinda felt good.When she started to wake up I made myself stop.
I've cried in front of her when people I loved have died and she comforted me.
I cant cry in front of her ever again,I dont need my wife telling me that I'm not a man ever again.
It sucks I wish I could.
You never cried M&M? Over what happened,not even alone?
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When my wife had her affair, I was broken-hearted.
But I didn't cry.
When I had my stupid revenge affair
I lost it and sobbed my heart out.
Posted via Mobile Device
Cheat on me, not a tear, but make me watch "Field of Dreams" and I blubber my eyes out when his dad comes out to play catch with him.

I wondered frequently why I did not cry over my broken heart, but I guess everyone's propensity is different.
 

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Discussion Starter #12
You have a weird relationship with your wife, atleast on some level;.

I haven't said this before but you did not deal with her affair properly..She has some weird control over you..Maybe the good outweighs the bad.And you blame all the bad on her Aspergers
Control? Not sure I'd agree with that. But the good does outweigh the bad.

And I know I didn't deal with her affair, properly. Which resulted in my stupid revenge affair. Hmm. I have just realised something. Perhaps my revenge affair did work to reconcile us? But I cannot reccomend revenge affairs. Too much heartache for both parties.
 

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Discussion Starter #13
I've cried,a lot sometimes.
While she was knee deep in her affair I broke down a couple times and cried in front of her only to have her tell me I was unmanly.
Last night I cried when she fell asleep on the couch.
It was as close as I can get to crying in front of her,it kinda felt good.When she started to wake up I made myself stop.
I've cried in front of her when people I loved have died and she comforted me.
I cant cry in front of her ever again,I dont need my wife telling me that I'm not a man ever again.
It sucks I wish I could.
You never cried M&M? Over what happened,not even alone?
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I can't remember crying during her affair, Calvin. However, there's a lot that I have blanked out. Some stuff I remember, but there are gaps.

I was ill with Glandular Fever for a while when her affair was going, that might have had something to do with it.

But I do remember drinking a hell of a lot, too.
 

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Discussion Starter #14
You cried because you broke a vow you said you would never break. You betrayed yourself also, not just your wife. You gave a piece of your soul away when you cheated. When she cheated all she did was betray you but you still had your dignity and honor (or whatever you want to call it).
Oh my God. That's so true. It is more true than I can actually say at the moment. Wow. Thank you.
 

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Was it revenge? What's the point of that? I doubt it was revenge.
Revenge? Wanting to take something back? Wanting to get some emotional support that I could not get at home? Maybe?
 

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Discussion Starter #16
I've cried,a lot sometimes.
While she was knee deep in her affair I broke down a couple times and cried in front of her only to have her tell me I was unmanly.
Last night I cried when she fell asleep on the couch.
It was as close as I can get to crying in front of her,it kinda felt good.When she started to wake up I made myself stop.
I've cried in front of her when people I loved have died and she comforted me.
I cant cry in front of her ever again,I dont need my wife telling me that I'm not a man ever again.
It sucks I wish I could.
You never cried M&M? Over what happened,not even alone?
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Calvin, your wife did not really think you were unmannly. Sometimes what people say is not what they mean.

"Stop crying. It is unmanly" really means: "Oh, my God! The love of my life is crying his eyes out! And it is my fault! Yet I can't tell him that, because I can't admit to that! I wish he would stop crying! It is making me realise how badly I have hurt him! How can I stop him, then? Oh... I know! I'll tell him it is unmanly!"
 

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I can't remember crying during her affair, Calvin. However, there's a lot that I have blanked out. Some stuff I remember, but there are gaps.

I was ill with Glandular Fever for a while when her affair was going, that might have had something to do with it.

But I do remember drinking a hell of a lot, too.
Cry,drink,insomnia,Bumed out,depressed.....
Its all crying but in a different way I guess.
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Mattmatt?

Wtf is wrong with you!

Cry if you want! But you've been on this forum long enough you don't question yourself. It is what it is. You act how you act.

You are man! You are alpha! You roar! You cry! Same. Same!

You are just you!
 

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I drenched my bed with tears and snot on dday, got an hour
of sleep and went into work the next day looking like walking death.

I mourned my wife that night, ALL night, with her sitting right next
to me while looking at me like I was a child having a meltdown
in the middle of the grocery store or something.

It felt more like a funeral.
 
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