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Well he's drunk again. He started off by not coming home right after work; he was gold panning instead. Fortunately he did play and hang out with our kids when he got home, While I did the bedtime routine he started in with the drinking and smoking. Which lead to me finding out he was talking to someone I've said I was uncomfortable with...he feels I'm crazy and irrational or at least that's what he insist it is so here is the rest of the story. When I was pregnant with my first child I cut all ties with drinking and smoking pot...I still enjoy a few drinks here and there but the weed isn't fun anymore. Anyway during that time a friend of mine and I started to drift apart. While I was pregnant I found she was talking with my husband regularly and texting him a few times a week. I went bat **** crazy one day and called her leaving a long ranting message about how she needs to stay the hell away from my husband and that I feel like something more than just friends is going on. She text me back and says she would never do that. HMMMM. Fast forward to our first born's 1st birthday she comes over to give our daughter a gift a few days after the party. I was generally overwhelmed and unhappy and was talking with her about this when my husband storms in all upset about how I'm talking **** about him with my friend. She immediately drops her conversation with me and runs outside to smoke out with him. Even more interesting. Fast forward another few months and he has a binge drinking night with his pals, the next day I check his phone (i know bad) and I find a series of text to this friend trying to find her sisters house. I text her and ask if he was with her last night and never get a response back. Shortly thereafter she blocks me from facebook and mind you during this whole 2 to 3 year period she rarely calls or text me but continues to talk with the hubby atleast 1x per month. It all seems so strange. While I'm pregnant with our 2nd child the hubbys sister says she has to tell me something and tells me the hubby told his brother he got a bj from this female friend of mine. I blow a gasket and confront him he swears he only said it to get his brother to confess having sex with this chick and that yes he did spend the night with but it was only to keep her company because she just split up with this guy who she has since then gotten back together with. I said well I'm just not comfortable with him talking with her, but he continues to talk with her. Tonight I've caught them talking again and it pisses me off so bad not to mention it hurts me deeply. He says he's talking with her boyfriend but I don't believe him. Am I crazy to feel that way? Is it warped that I believe something has happened between them? Since he's drunk we cant even talk with each other right now because it just becomes a fight.
 

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No, you aren't crazy. Your husband is cheating. He also has made it very clear what his priorities are.

What would you expect him to say, "Yep, I betrayed you and I'm making this other woman a lot more important than you!" Never going to happen, but maybe, just maybe, he can keep you doubting yourself so you want create problems for him.

You do NOT need to have proof of an affair to decide that his behavior isn't acceptable.
 

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You only have one Life , it's Never too late to turn around and Make a change .

To live with somene and always be unsure of certain insecurities , as i blissfully did for 14 Long Months - only to catch em again november Last year , is an insult to your intelligence , and something i do not Even wish upon my worst enemy .

Ok -maybe with the exception of one of em ....
 

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I agree with the above. Sadly in today's world you have to be willing to do what is best for you and those kiddos.

and that may mean walking away b/c in my opinion (and I like to have drinks often as well but no drugs) none of this is cool nor ok when married and yes his priorities are out of whack as he's not being a man but a selfish little boy who needs to grow up a little and handle his repsonsibilities.

you have to be able to trust him and if you don't then this will continue and potentially get worse.

tough decisions ahead and you will be the only one able to make them.

i wish you luck. be strong and do what is right even if it doesn't feel that way currently.

Joe
 
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