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Long story short my husband and i have been amrried 1 year and been together 1 year and 10 months. He was great, sweet, kind, trustworthy....but that changed and very quick. He became agrressive abusive and mean. He said horrible things when he was angry always saying sorry but never realizing the damage. Well to shorten this up, hes horribly mean and says thins that men should never say to their wives. Well hes punched me, kicked me etc and ive always forgiven him hoping he would become a better an, and its the weirdest thing during our good moments hes better than ever, planning out our anniversary this year when last year he didnt do anythig besides guilt trip me. BUT during our bad moments he cares alot less......he is mean to me and actually sexually assaults me and thinks its hilarious when he sees how upset it makes me and then i tell him how he is a sick person to purposelly make me upset and then think its funny, and when i say that he laughs even harder. eventually he snaps out of it and then tells me how much he loves me but it never sounds sincere, his apologies always sound fake, but i kept forgiving him and last night he had the balls to pick a fight because i wouldnt go down on him. I never promised i would he was just upset because i said i wouldnt since it hutrs my mouth, i always wind up in pain when i do it. He NEVER goes down on me, he touches me about 2x a month, and i touch him about 3-4x a week yet he picks a fit because i wont go down on him! when we have sex he doesnt give me pleasure, he onyl lasts about 3 minutes, a few days ago only lasted about 30 seconds. He doesnt watchporn, has never cheated, and this year planned out my birthday and our anniversary and has been spending alot of tie with me but last night he didnt care to fight again over something so silly such as me not going down on him! I told him if he cared about making our marriage work he would avoid silly fights and try his hardest to work things out, but he just said that if porn stars can do it why cant i, i pointed out how stupid that sounds and he said well there are girls trying to be pornstars and they can do it, and their not even professional....i told him again how screwed up it was to compare me to that and he didnt care. I slept on the couch and this morning he came in and cuddled up to me and i told him to get the heck away from me that i was sick of his crap, and he just laughed and sarcastically said tht he fell asleep....and then he laughed when he saw how upset i was. I told him that i didnt love him anymoer because after what he said last ight and showing me how little our marriage meant to him that the only peice of me tht still loved him was gone, and he said he was ok with that. I am scared of a divorce, but right now i feel numb. I refuse to cry over a man who so easily doesnt care about me. if he loved me wouldnt he avoid silly fights? wouldnt he talk rather than fight? his actions show he doesnt love me but his sarcastic and insincere words say that he does......... im thinking of staying with him till we both are financially ready but i am so scared of the coming fights. Help?
 

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Money is NEVER a reason to stay in the situation you describe. As a matter of fact NOTHING is ever a reason to say in the situation you describe. Been there. Done that. So what if you have no money when you get out. You have your life. When I left my first husband, I felt fat, ugly, stupid, and useless. I was none of those things. You will prosper and grow in your newfound freedom. If he beats you, turn him in. If you don't do it for yourself, do it for the next person he hooks up with. At least he'll have a record for them to look at before committing to him. If you're too frightened to turn him in, at least get yourself out. I know it's scary. When I left my first husband, I did so with a loaded weapon in my lap. Don't get to that point. Leave, now.
 
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