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Sounds like she confessed before you found out. I suspect others knew and you were going to find out anyway.

If you try and R her friend has to be banished for life and any enabling friends as well.

Don't jump into R too fast. Drinking is an excuse but in reality there isn't any justifiable one.

She knew better but did it anyway.
 

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She knew better but did it anyway.
This is the real deal. @She'sStillGotIt has GotIt about shaking hands with Jesus. In fact, receiving Him as their Savior is just about the only thing that makes enough change in a person to stop their cheating. Even if they do, it can take many years for the kind of contrition required to cause all excuses to cease, complete repentance, and acknowledgement of complete fault.

It is not impossible with God. I personally think that without God, it is impossible, and unlikely even with God.

It's a good idea to consult an attorney. Know exactly where you stand, especially in the custodial sense.
 

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My GF 3 weeks ago went out with friends. She was drunk and had sex with a friend of hers. She said it is the first time she has cheated but I struggle now to believe her. I don't trust her. She said she wished she didn't do it but that doesn't help me. She had a lot of guilt but not until after the sex was done. She came home after sex with her friend and crying woke me up and said she slept with the friend of hers. It has been 3 weeks since she telling me. I don't know how or if we move past this. If we don't have our 2 kids I think I would leave.
Well, she confessed without being prompted. There is that to consider.

I would suggest relationship counselling.

And even if you don't stay together, she needs to cut back on her drinking. Especially as she is a mother responsible for two children.
 

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I second looking at her phone/emails/social media/etc.. I don't buy that it "just" happened with her friend. I agree that she has probably been attracted for quite a while...

AND if any chance of R, this person (and the other friends who were there) need to be 100% completely out of her life FOREVER. No contact what so ever. If they are from work, she needs to find a new job. And those are just the BASICS for the beginning of any sort of R.
 

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Don't stay for the kids. SO many betrayed spouses do that and it's a slow sleigh-ride to Hell. It's the worst reason to stay together and one of the biggest excuses a betrayed spouse uses to stay right where they are because they're too afraid to make a life change for the better..
This is what I was thinking. I understand wanting to be there for the kids and be with them full time. But depending on how one feels about his spouse, this situation could turn as toxic as separating. Trying to stay when every cell in his body is not happy with the relationship may just prolong the inevitable. It might be better for everyone to rip the band aid off.
 

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Do not use your kids as an excuse to stay.
If her cheating is a deal breaker then so be it.She has shown she can’t be trusted.
Whatever you do don’t marry her.
See a lawyer and discuss custody.
Honestly, best answer right here ^^^... don't overthink it. Move on. In the long run it will be the best thing for yourself and your kids. There is nothing worse for kids than growing up in a household full of mistrust and tension.
 
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