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9 Posts
I left my verbally and sometimes physically abusive husband a few months back, with us sharing time with our little boy. I have told my husband that I will be pursuing a divorce and have recently met with a lawyer.
Hubby has recently started counseling to focus on his anger issues as a last-ditch effort to win me back. He has been to two sessions. He had also recently been prescribed anti-depressants by his physician.
Anyway, here's the deal: this counselor has told him that there is "no way" a woman just leaves a marriage without working on it, and that there must be another man involved.
This has made my life even worse, dealing with this man. He has now shifted all the blame on me, thinking there has been this affair (there hasn't) and has this vendetta wanting to make my life a "living hell" and threatening to hurt this "other man."
Keep in mind my husband did share the fact that he has been verbally and physically abusive towards me with this counselor. What kind of counselor tells someone that their wife is obviously cheating b/c she wants out without working on it, especially after it was revealed there was abuse in the marriage? I was thrown down the stairs in front of my son (among other things), prevented from leaving my house multiple times, and I was called names and criticized almost every day of the last 9 years. THAT is why I left the marriage; I told my husband for the last year he'd better change or I would leave. I suggested counseling and he refused.
I am thinking about writing this counseling center a letter telling them to quit putting stupid ideas in my husband's head as it's making things worse for me. Is this a good idea?
And since when is it wrong to leave an abuser? Grrr.
Hubby has recently started counseling to focus on his anger issues as a last-ditch effort to win me back. He has been to two sessions. He had also recently been prescribed anti-depressants by his physician.
Anyway, here's the deal: this counselor has told him that there is "no way" a woman just leaves a marriage without working on it, and that there must be another man involved.
This has made my life even worse, dealing with this man. He has now shifted all the blame on me, thinking there has been this affair (there hasn't) and has this vendetta wanting to make my life a "living hell" and threatening to hurt this "other man."
Keep in mind my husband did share the fact that he has been verbally and physically abusive towards me with this counselor. What kind of counselor tells someone that their wife is obviously cheating b/c she wants out without working on it, especially after it was revealed there was abuse in the marriage? I was thrown down the stairs in front of my son (among other things), prevented from leaving my house multiple times, and I was called names and criticized almost every day of the last 9 years. THAT is why I left the marriage; I told my husband for the last year he'd better change or I would leave. I suggested counseling and he refused.
I am thinking about writing this counseling center a letter telling them to quit putting stupid ideas in my husband's head as it's making things worse for me. Is this a good idea?
And since when is it wrong to leave an abuser? Grrr.