A total 180 with kids is not really possible unless you go to a situation where there is a neutral place (like daycare, school, etc.) where one parent drops off and the other picks up.
It sounds like he's acting like a teenager moving away from home for the first time. Don't expect him to say things that make sense. Of course you never heard about his need for space before -- he's thinking up new reasons all the time. Expect to hear more new reasons, too. It's part of the script, I'm afraid.
Get to a lawyer and start protecting yourself from him taking things that aren't specifically his. Personal items that have any kind of value should be put where he can't get to them.
Unfortunately for you and your (probable) desire to make him know what he's missing, living with a 'family' is going to make that a little harder to achieve. He's getting that need met by them.
Now you know that you've reached the point where it isn't going to benefit you to keep telling him how you feel, or what you were hoping for your relationship. You know you were honest with him. Don't regret that.
But now, it's time to give him what he wants, and let your anger carry you forward. Even if you have to see him, you can keep the personal contact to a minimum. Refrain from telling him ANYTHING about your personal life. Don't ask anything about his. Talk strictly about your child and your divorce. Don't be angry, but don't be overly nice, either. Just calm and as cordial as you'd be to a store clerk. You might have to fake it at first, but eventually, you won't be faking it anymore. You really won't care to know about him, or to share yourself with him.
You can't make him a better father, so be the best mom you can.
It sounds like he's acting like a teenager moving away from home for the first time. Don't expect him to say things that make sense. Of course you never heard about his need for space before -- he's thinking up new reasons all the time. Expect to hear more new reasons, too. It's part of the script, I'm afraid.
Get to a lawyer and start protecting yourself from him taking things that aren't specifically his. Personal items that have any kind of value should be put where he can't get to them.
Unfortunately for you and your (probable) desire to make him know what he's missing, living with a 'family' is going to make that a little harder to achieve. He's getting that need met by them.
Now you know that you've reached the point where it isn't going to benefit you to keep telling him how you feel, or what you were hoping for your relationship. You know you were honest with him. Don't regret that.
But now, it's time to give him what he wants, and let your anger carry you forward. Even if you have to see him, you can keep the personal contact to a minimum. Refrain from telling him ANYTHING about your personal life. Don't ask anything about his. Talk strictly about your child and your divorce. Don't be angry, but don't be overly nice, either. Just calm and as cordial as you'd be to a store clerk. You might have to fake it at first, but eventually, you won't be faking it anymore. You really won't care to know about him, or to share yourself with him.
You can't make him a better father, so be the best mom you can.
