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I need some advice and I hope someone here can help me. Me and my wife have been married for 6 years. We have 2 young sons. Sex has become very very stale. We used to have sex all the time and then it became less and less. We used to give each other oral sex and then she stopped because she said she didn't like it anymore. I eventually stopped also and now, we probably have sex once every 2 or 3 months.

My brother is 4 years my senior and he is also married. I never liked the way my wife acts around him and it always makes me feel uneasy. I am not too tech savvy but I thought she was cheating on me. I hired a detective and discovered that she has been seeing my brother. The detective installed a camera in our bedroom and I saw that my brother came over during lunch to see her. She complained of being just off her period but he said he didn't care. He gave her oral sex and then they had sex in my bed. I was very hurt to learn all of this.

I have not confronted my brother or her. All I can do is cry. I do love them both but I don't know what to do. I think the oral sex is significant because it's always something she liked. I stopped giving it to her as a punishment for her not giving it to me. Was that the right thing to do? I'm not sure I want to expose this because I will break up my marriage as well as my brothers. What can I do to win my wife's heart back so she will stop seeing my brother?
 

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Okay, that's some hardcore stuff my friend.
You got to find out what you want. Are you okay with what happened and still love your wife if she change? Got to know what you want.
My wife cheated but we are still together because I forgave her.
 

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My friend. What marriage are you saving. Yu wife is sleeping with your brother and you think you have something to save!????

Even if you want to stay married to this woman, your only hope is to confront her, expose your brother and her to evryone and see if there is remorse. If not, move on.
 

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Sorry for your situation but personally I'd be blowing my stack I think......what a double betrayal.Btw,even if you want to overlook it and move on,its only right your sister-in-law gets a choice in the matter.Truth is as long as she's in the affair,you can't reconcile.Hope you get some good advice,but I'm at a loss.Take care.
 

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Well, this is a tough deal Titus, you're going to feel bad for a long time, you'll feel disoriented for the next month at least, and totally confused for several months, and sad for much longer.

Nothing you do will make you feel better; get used to that idea right now. This will be a long haul.

You obviously need to tell both parties that they're busted and no longer allowed to see or communicate with each other.

After that you've got a ton of work to do; these folks here will get you up to speed on what that is.

I'm not saying much more about it because I know there are two small kids involved, and a brother, and my solution would blow it all up, because I would be out of the house tonight.

But I know that solution isn't for everyone; good luck my friend.

T
 

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What kind of man will have sex with his brother's wife?

What kind of woman will have sex with her brother in law on her husband's bed?

There is nothing here to save.
What you saw is just one episode of her adultery , there are many more.
Exposé your brother to his wife and your entire family.

Tomorrow should be the first day of the rest of your new life.
 

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Discussion Starter #7
I have been trying to tell myself that this was the first time. They were so casual that I can't force myself to believe that. The problem is that even though I am hurting, I still love them both. Even if we do get divorced, I will always be connected with my brother and her because of the kids. I want to try to salvage something from this marriage if I can.
 

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Good God almighty. I really can't think of much worse of an affair than your own flesh and blood hitting your spouse, especially after they say that they are no longer interested in having sex with you.

Hate to break the news to you but your marriage was nuked and FUBAR'd. Trying to salvage something from this would be like trying to find scraps in Nagasaki after the bomb was dropped on them. And with the kids to consider, she is in prime cake-eating position because she has family court in her back pocket if the day comes when you want out (read; child sort and alimony).

I cannot tell you what to do because the love for my WW turned ice cold after finding out about her fling. Personally, I would be out the door. It's one thing to be considered your spouse's's second choice. It's an entirely different story when her #1 is your older brother.

Leave and take care of the child support. Distance yourself from your brother, stat. That's all I can say...
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What kind of man will have sex with his brother's wife?

What kind of woman will have sex with her brother in law on her husband's bed?

There is nothing here to save.
What you saw is just one episode of her adultery , there are many more.
Exposé your brother to his wife and your entire family.

Tomorrow should be the first day of the rest of your new life.
:iagree:

Titus, it's natural to want to save your family. However, your wife and your brother has destroyed the life that you once knew. Expose them both and let the chips fall where they may. Personally, my brother would be dead to me and I would have to think long and hard about trying to work it out with the wife.
 

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I cant decide what is the most screwed up.

1. Your wifes intimacy wuth your brother
2. Your brothers intimacy with your wife
3. Your calm considerations about what to do

I would be throwing her **** out in the front yard and going to see your brother, mother, father, MIL and FIL. You want her back? For what? Dump her like the weekly trash
 

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I cant decide what is the most screwed up.

1. Your wifes intimacy wuth your brother
2. Your brothers intimacy with your wife
3. Your calm considerations about what to do

I would be throwing her **** out in the front yard and going to see your brother, mother, father, MIL and FIL. You want her back? For what? Dump her like the weekly trash
You need to expose if this is a true story to everyone today!
 

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Buddy, Sorry you are here, the place to which no one should come.

Your guts were cautioning you all along and finally you had a PI to investigate.

Your wife is in deep affair with your elder brother. For many years. He did not care if she had her menstrual cycle. I think that this affair has been going on for more time than what you think.

Leave now.
 

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Hi Titus,Iam sorry for your situation,but seriously man you need to wake up...WAKE UP ! You need to wake up and start taking control of your life and start respecting yourself...

I still cant understand your so passive reaction and even considering reconcilation and saying that you will still have a relationship with your brother...I would never ever talk with him again,I would wish him the most painful death that God can give him...

Man seriously wake up,and when you wake up you will see that your brother doesn't love you,that your wife doesn't love you and that this affair is going on for a long time and my advice is to DNA test your children.

Personaly if I were you I would organize a big party and invite all your family,your wifes family,family of your brothers wife and at least all your close friends and then in the middle of the party I would try to have some atention from them and then I would play them the movie of your brother and your wife and then I would give your wife the divorce papers in front of them all...That would be my D-day and my revenge - exposing the truth to anyone that matters in your life so that they can see what kind of people the two of them are...After this kind of exposing I think that they would be so ashamed of their actions that they probably would hide in a mouse hole if they could...

And again please wake up and start respecting yourself...

Good Luck
 

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In short, F$#k your wife, divorce her and find a better class of woman.

Your so called brother is not your brother. You share the same blood but his betrayal is beyond belief. He can NEVER be trusted for ANYTHING again. He obviously doesn't respect, care, or even love you the same way you feel for him. If I was you, I would consider him dead to me and never have anything to do with him again. Brothers fight, argue and do stupid things to one another BUT there is a line as Brothers, Men,...Heck just family period that should not be crossed.

Expose this video to both families. Mom, Dad, Uncles, Cousins,Friends, and Inlaws.
 

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Now this is some seriously fked up sh-t mate

You HAVE to confront this, your wife and your brother MUST face the consequences of their actions
 
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