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Hi its my first time posting on this forum, but I need help fast! I was not sure where to post this, but this topic seems to be the best fit so here goes nothing!
My girlfriend of 3 years has lost interest in me sexually for the last 9 months to a year. At the beginning of our relationship, we had sex all the time, easily 4 times a week. This continued well into the 1 year mark, where abruptly it stopped. Sex became something I had to beg for (Sorry I guess I just have tons of testosterone) and when we did do it (maybe twice a month if that) it would seem like a chore she had to do to get on with her day. We talked about the problems that I had with our sex life, and things got better for about 6 months, when it all went downhill again. This cycle of ups and downs has continued throughout the last 1 yr of our relationship, until the last 6 months or so. In the last 6 months, we have had sex maybe 3 times.
I am generally a cuddly person, and I like physical contact. Recently, I am the only one initiating any sort of romance or passion in our relationship. She does not want to cuddle, kiss, hug, or otherwise pay any attention to me even if I initiate it. She has stopped wanting to go out on dates, and prefers to just stay at home instead of going out to dinner. A romantic night used to be dinner, a movie at her place then a little hanky panky afterwards, but lately the best it gets is watching TV with her until she falls asleep, at which point I get her up to bed. The end.
She has been off of birth control now for about 2 months due to an insurance issue. She does not seem to be trying to resolve it however, and among many other excuses her favorite is "once Im back on birth control, we can finally do it! I want to too!" but if past experience has anything to say, she will find some other reason to turn me down.
I am not an unattractive person, and I sure think I know what I'm doing in the sack. The few times I do get lucky, she always leaves pleased. She has orgasms way too easily, and often we stop having sex before I can even climax because she just becomes too exhausted.
Ultimately, I dont want to break up with my girlfriend. We were both virgins when we started dating, and we are each other's one and onlys. I love her to death, I just dont like feeling like I am a hassle and a bother, and I want her interested in intimacy. I have recently been drinking and masturbating a lot (shocker, right?) to try and rid myself of tension, but Im talking in circles when it comes to our sex life. We have had talks of marriage since the beginning, and I have never doubted that we would end up happy until the last few months. How can I get my girlfriend to respond to me and bring intimacy back into our relationship? I dont want to go from a sexless dating couple to a sexless engaged couple.
Any help would be greatly appreciated, and ask away for questions Ill respond.
My girlfriend of 3 years has lost interest in me sexually for the last 9 months to a year. At the beginning of our relationship, we had sex all the time, easily 4 times a week. This continued well into the 1 year mark, where abruptly it stopped. Sex became something I had to beg for (Sorry I guess I just have tons of testosterone) and when we did do it (maybe twice a month if that) it would seem like a chore she had to do to get on with her day. We talked about the problems that I had with our sex life, and things got better for about 6 months, when it all went downhill again. This cycle of ups and downs has continued throughout the last 1 yr of our relationship, until the last 6 months or so. In the last 6 months, we have had sex maybe 3 times.
I am generally a cuddly person, and I like physical contact. Recently, I am the only one initiating any sort of romance or passion in our relationship. She does not want to cuddle, kiss, hug, or otherwise pay any attention to me even if I initiate it. She has stopped wanting to go out on dates, and prefers to just stay at home instead of going out to dinner. A romantic night used to be dinner, a movie at her place then a little hanky panky afterwards, but lately the best it gets is watching TV with her until she falls asleep, at which point I get her up to bed. The end.
She has been off of birth control now for about 2 months due to an insurance issue. She does not seem to be trying to resolve it however, and among many other excuses her favorite is "once Im back on birth control, we can finally do it! I want to too!" but if past experience has anything to say, she will find some other reason to turn me down.
I am not an unattractive person, and I sure think I know what I'm doing in the sack. The few times I do get lucky, she always leaves pleased. She has orgasms way too easily, and often we stop having sex before I can even climax because she just becomes too exhausted.
Ultimately, I dont want to break up with my girlfriend. We were both virgins when we started dating, and we are each other's one and onlys. I love her to death, I just dont like feeling like I am a hassle and a bother, and I want her interested in intimacy. I have recently been drinking and masturbating a lot (shocker, right?) to try and rid myself of tension, but Im talking in circles when it comes to our sex life. We have had talks of marriage since the beginning, and I have never doubted that we would end up happy until the last few months. How can I get my girlfriend to respond to me and bring intimacy back into our relationship? I dont want to go from a sexless dating couple to a sexless engaged couple.
Any help would be greatly appreciated, and ask away for questions Ill respond.
