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I have been lurking the forums since I found out about my husband's cyber/sexting affair back in July. While I made a ton of mistakes on DDay, I think that we are finally making progress towards reconciling. He has been great with being transparent and allowing me to work through my pain and has cut off all ties to websites that he would trawl for cyber sex. I know that we both have a long road to travel and I feel confident we will work through this adversity.

Here is where I am having a stumbling block. I found out about my husband's cyber/sexting affair and confronted the OW. My husband immediately ended contact with her and gave me control over his computer, cell phone (I am the only one with parental controls and he had to live with Y7 rated content bwahaha), passwords to all accounts-even his work email. He isn't the problem. Its what this lovely creature did to me. She faked an email from her "husband". I naively poured my heart out to this "person" and was more or less told I would never get an apology from her and to get over it because it was "a lesson learned". I was devastated and still am because one of the points I made to my husband was to look at the case Talhotblond about people lying on the internet and the risks involved. And here I fell for it, too. I have her ip addresses. I was able to find the areas where they originated. I want to find out who this person is once and for all and expose her. I'm pretty sure she's still doing it. I still have all the pictures and emails and meebo stupidity they exchanged.

Is there anything I can do to find her? I've looked at several investigative tip threads but I don't know what to do.

Thanks so much for any direction anyone might be able to offer. The only positive is that by her lying to me it snapped his head out of the fog very quickly and made him regret and hate his behaviour. Silver lining, I suppose.
 

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I have. He thought she was who she said she was because he didn't think she'd lie about that. He gave me the awesome "why would she lie?" line when he was first confronted.

The names on the emails I received were completely different than the name she gave him. That's the first clue I had that she wrote the emails. Then I went on spokeo and searched all the emails and names and locations. Nothing.
 

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Keep digging. I found out the MOW's BH's cell phone number via facebook. It took about two months. Do me a faver and PM her name. I will do some research.
 

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Are you still able to contact her? Meaning does she know you know she is impersonating her husband? Or did you figure that out?

I mean search search search the internet. Use different search engines. I only knew the OWs first name and phone number and town....and I have since found out EVERYTHING about this skank all online and all for free. (I know her past marriages, her family members, where she lives, her boyfriends etc etc. I know A LOT)
 

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Might be too advanced a tip but...

All devices have a MAC address. If you have an SMS or other message taged with a MAC address you can map search it. When the google car drives around taking pictures they also gather wireless connection information which includes the mac address of the devices in the area and signal strength. Because the car drives down every street you can triangulate the location of the device.

Before going this route try searching the known email addresses and phone numbers.
 

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I have. He thought she was who she said she was because he didn't think she'd lie about that. He gave me the awesome "why would she lie?" line when he was first confronted.

The names on the emails I received were completely different than the name she gave him. That's the first clue I had that she wrote the emails. Then I went on spokeo and searched all the emails and names and locations. Nothing.
Did he ever contact her by phone at any time? If he did, can you research the phone number?
 

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They never spoke by phone but they both used their iphones to message each via gmail and meebo but not traditional texting. May I just say I hate my iphone now and cringe whenever I see him even playing bejeweled on his phone?

I did use the MAC address and was able to find the general area where she was located at the time the messages were sent but didn't know what to do with that information. That was how I realised the emails from her "husband" were fake because he claimed they lived in another state.

I hate that I fell into her trap by thinking I was talking to her spouse after I received the email from him. It makes me so angry that it was the creature from craigslist all along. I just want to blow her game out of the water.
 

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I just posted my story under my profile. I have EVERYTHING from their exchange including horrid pictures. They really do affair down!

My dream is to send a packet between Thanksgiving and Christmas to her husband with all my evidence. Is that wrong?
 

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They never spoke by phone but they both used their iphones to message each via gmail and meebo but not traditional texting. May I just say I hate my iphone now and cringe whenever I see him even playing bejeweled on his phone?

I did use the MAC address and was able to find the general area where she was located at the time the messages were sent but didn't know what to do with that information. That was how I realised the emails from her "husband" were fake because he claimed they lived in another state.

I hate that I fell into her trap by thinking I was talking to her spouse after I received the email from him. It makes me so angry that it was the creature from craigslist all along. I just want to blow her game out of the water.
If the location is residential it puts you at about where their house is. Then just look up the people in that area...
 

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Has all contact stopped for sure? Do yo suspect more than an EA?

If you're doing it all for pure revenge to get back at her then my suggestion is use all that energy towards working it out with your husband.

You ever hear of those people who put 100% into finding the other person and lose themselves and their family in the process.

Not saying you shouldn't expose her but how much are you willing to sacrifice to find this OW and expose her?
 

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I hate that she thought she could email me as her husband and let me feel like an idiot. I hate that she is still out there doing this to other people and I allowed myself to be vulnerable to a supposed other betrayed spouse while she was probably laughing at me.

All contact has definitely stopped. He really has been working hard on fixing himself as I have also worked on being a better person overall. For him it really was about sex themed chat but this exchange was the worst and closest to actually crossing the line from EA to PA.

I haven't tried to find her for a couple months but I thought it couldn't hurt to see if there were resources available that I might not have known about.

I just wish I never had to even know about this kind of life.
 
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