Finally seeking help!

My wife and I have been married for 11 years. We have three small children. All this time I felt that everything was okay. However, over the last several weeks I've started noticing things that I'm doing that are sabotaging our marriage. I have caught myself doing things that were not nice.

I know that I'm not doing it intentionally but I now notice that I am a negative person. I have issues with people around me being happy. That sucks! I know that I need help but I fear that I may have lost the only person that I truly love.

Well two days ago it came full circle. We talked about our marriage and where it's going. I have never cried so much in a two day period... I am exhausted as I type.

I know exactly what I have done to hurt my wife. Can someone help me understand what is going on? Can I ever reconnect with my wife? Will she ever love me the way she loved me when we got married?

I told her that I will do everything in my power to fix what I have done. I have stated that I can't undo the bad things that I have done but I will do everything in my power to fix ME. I want to fix ME! I want to be a positive person for my children but most importantly for my wife. Some of these feelings I'm having are because I've been thinking about my purpose in life. How do people percieve me?