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Re: Fiancées tattoo.

Are you serious?!? What's so horrible about tattoos? I think that's fantastic about how she wants to support her friend, and this by no means shows that she's choosing you over her, and you're not very nice to make her choose who is more important: her friend or you. Personally, I don't blame her one bit for being furious; it's her body, and she can choose to put a tattoo on it if she would like to do that. I haven't read any of the replies so far, and won't get through them all, but am curious to see if the wedding actually went through!
I agree with you I love tattoos.
 

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Re: Fiancées tattoo.

Are you serious?!? What's so horrible about tattoos? I think that's fantastic about how she wants to support her friend, and this by no means shows that she's choosing you over her, and you're not very nice to make her choose who is more important: her friend or you. Personally, I don't blame her one bit for being furious; it's her body, and she can choose to put a tattoo on it if she would like to do that. I haven't read any of the replies so far, and won't get through them all, but am curious to see if the wedding actually went through!

All you had to do is read the first sentence....
 

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Discussion Starter #964
Re: Fiancées tattoo.

Buy her a new one,you can afford it.How much was the first one.I would love to know how much guy's like you spend on rings.
Anything you want to know just ask,don't be shy.Seriously dude wtf.
Tell me how much are you paid and I will tell you how long it will take you to pay for a ring that "guys like me" buy for our girlfriends.
What does that statement even mean,"guys like me"
Why are you so enthralled with my story anyway.
 

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Re: Fiancées tattoo.

Anything you want to know just ask,don't be shy.Seriously dude wtf.
Tell me how much are you paid and I will tell you how long it will take you to pay for a ring that "guys like me" buy for our girlfriends.
What does that statement even mean,"guys like me"
Why are you so enthralled with my story anyway.
Ok I'll play along I earn eighty thousand euro a year.The reason I like your story is because it proves that even rich people can be brought down to earth by women.
 

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Re: Fiancées tattoo.

Ok I'll play along I earn eighty thousand euro a year.The reason I like your story is because it proves that even rich people can be brought down to earth by women.
But it is stupid breaking up over a tattoo.She should have married him and then got it.What could he have done then.
 

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Re: Fiancées tattoo.

We are living together but we are not engaged, there is no wedding planned.
Don't get her pregnant. If you do she will have you by the balls.

“If you've got them by the balls, their hearts and minds will follow.”

― Theodore Roosevelt
 

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Re: Fiancées tattoo.

I agree with you I love tattoos.
I hate tattoos and my sons have them all over them. Some are pretty amazing works of art but they won't look that way forever. I see nothing wrong with Andy1001's dislike of tattoos as being a show stopper. I would not marry someone who smoked and if they started after I was engaged to them I would drop them like a hot potato.
 

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Discussion Starter #969
Re: Fiancées tattoo.

Don't get her pregnant. If you do she will have you by the balls.

“If you've got them by the balls, their hearts and minds will follow.”

― Theodore Roosevelt
It's a bit late for that I'm afraid,she is due at the end of this month.When you say she will have me by the balls is it financially you mean.Money doesn't come into the equation,if I could get her to accept some money from me I would be happier.By the way we have custody agreements in place and they are watertight.
 

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Re: Fiancées tattoo.

It's a bit late for that I'm afraid,she is due at the end of this month.When you say she will have me by the balls is it financially you mean.Money doesn't come into the equation,if I could get her to accept some money from me I would be happier.By the way we have custody agreements in place and they are watertight.
May I ask what those custody agreements are?
 

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Discussion Starter #971 (Edited)
Re: Fiancées tattoo.

May I ask what those custody agreements are?
The main agreement is that my house is the baby's primary residence and if we do not stay together my gf can not move with the baby more than fifteen miles away.The baby will own a house in my area and my gf can live there if we split up and that will also be considered primary residence.This is mainly so that when she starts school she can't be removed unless we both agree.I haven't made up my mind yet but we may homeschool for a while anyway.(Your idea)The actual hours will be finalised if necessary when the baby is finished breastfeeding.This is all in case we break up and I really don't think we will.
This sounds like a business contract but with the inheritance coming into play I wanted to make sure my girlfriends mother would never be able to get her hands on any of my daughters money.If anything should happen to my gf health wise or god forbid she died,I would get full custody.When she signed the custody agreement I told my gf that I would pay for her sons education until he is twenty five and at my insistence this was also made a legal agreement.When we were to be married originally I had intended to adopt him and as my son of course I would take care of everything.
If my gf decides to go back to work as she has threatened than the baby will stay with me during the day and I will employ a nanny or even two if necessary.My daughter cannot sell the house until she is twenty five without my permission so my gf will not be homeless in any circumstances.
 

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Re: Fiancées tattoo.

The main agreement is that my house is the baby's primary residence and if we do not stay together my gf can not move with the baby more than fifteen miles away.The baby will own a house in my area and my gf can live there if we split up and that will also be considered primary residence.This is mainly so that when she starts school she can't be removed unless we both agree.I haven't made up my mind yet but we may homeschool for a while anyway.(Your idea)The actual hours will be finalised if necessary when the baby is finished breastfeeding.This is all in case we break up and I really don't think we will.
This sounds like a business contract but with the inheritance coming into play I wanted to make sure my girlfriends mother would never be able to get her hands on any of my daughters money.If anything should happen to my gf health wise or god forbid she died,I would get full custody.When she signed the custody agreement I told my gf that I would pay for her sons education until he is twenty five and at my insistence this was also made a legal agreement.When we were to be married originally I had intended to adopt him and as my son of course I would take care of everything.
If my gf decides to go back to work as she has threatened than the baby will stay with me during the day and I will employ a nanny or even two if necessary.My daughter cannot sell the house until she is twenty five without my permission so my gf will not be homeless in any circumstances.
Do you love your girlfriend, Andy? Enough to share power with her? (Meaning, to be willing to hear No from her, without retribution?)
 

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Re: Fiancées tattoo.

Hearing "NO" is right in certain circumstances. Love needs to be removed from financial equations. Yes, you can love your wife or girlfriend, but still protect them from bad decisions and family members without being controlling. This isn't a normal arrangement where you BOTH made the money. You had all of this looked at by lawyers correct? Did you have it filed with the courts?
 

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Discussion Starter #974
Re: Fiancées tattoo.

Do you love your girlfriend, Andy? Enough to share power with her? (Meaning, to be willing to hear No from her, without retribution?)
I'm not sure what you mean by retribution,do you mean would I try and manipulate her into getting my own way.Until I met J I had never loved anyone in a romantic way,reading this forum I realise that is not usual.When we broke up I thought that I would forget her in a few weeks but of course I didn't.In as much as I am capable of loving anyone I love J and she tells me she loves me.The love I feel for my unborn daughter is something that overwhelms me at times and I am probably far too protective of J because of this.
 

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Discussion Starter #975
Re: Fiancées tattoo.

Hearing "NO" is right in certain circumstances. Love needs to be removed from financial equations. Yes, you can love your wife or girlfriend, but still protect them from bad decisions and family members without being controlling. This isn't a normal arrangement where you BOTH made the money. You had all of this looked at by lawyers correct? Did you have it filed with the courts?
Yes it is filed.
 

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Re: Fiancées tattoo.

I'm not sure what you mean by retribution,do you mean would I try and manipulate her into getting my own way.Until I met J I had never loved anyone in a romantic way,reading this forum I realise that is not usual.When we broke up I thought that I would forget her in a few weeks but of course I didn't.In as much as I am capable of loving anyone I love J and she tells me she loves me.The love I feel for my unborn daughter is something that overwhelms me at times and I am probably far too protective of J because of this.
I am just wondering if you can hear No from her, if you can accept that.
 

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Re: Fiancées tattoo.

I am just wondering if you can hear No from her, if you can accept that.
You added the weighted word retribution. He is right to be confused by your question and you not giving him a clear answer on what he said. What he has drawn up protects his right to see his child, to have input in the upbringing and if they do not marry he still remains in the child's life.
 

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Discussion Starter #978
Re: Fiancées tattoo.

I am just wondering if you can hear No from her, if you can accept that.
I asked her to run the health centre, she said no and I accepted that.I didn't like it,I'm not used to being told no as you surmised on another thread but I did accept it.
I asked her to be a sahm and so far she is refusing but I'm hoping she changes her mind when the baby is born.If she goes back to work I will look after my daughter myself with the help of a nanny.
 

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Re: Fiancées tattoo.

I asked her to run the health centre, she said no and I accepted that.I didn't like it,I'm not used to being told no as you surmised on another thread but I did accept it.
I asked her to be a sahm and so far she is refusing but I'm hoping she changes her mind when the baby is born.If she goes back to work I will look after my daughter myself with the help of a nanny.
You have some wonderful qualities, Andy, sadly rare ones in this day and age.

I just think that in marriage it is very important, as far as is reasonably possible, to get buy-in from a partner, rather than resorting to strongarming.
 

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Re: Fiancées tattoo.

Are you serious?!? What's so horrible about tattoos? I think that's fantastic about how she wants to support her friend, and this by no means shows that she's choosing you over her, and you're not very nice to make her choose who is more important: her friend or you. Personally, I don't blame her one bit for being furious; it's her body, and she can choose to put a tattoo on it if she would like to do that. I haven't read any of the replies so far, and won't get through them all, but am curious to see if the wedding actually went through!
Not everyone likes tattoos.
 
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