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Re: Fiancées tattoo.

You're out of control on this one. It is HER body NOT YOURS. If you're this controlling with this then she's better off without you. If she wants and desires a tattoo then that's on her. She doesn't need your approval to get one. We don't live under Sharia Law and you can't control her. If you don't marry her because she got a tattoo then you never loved her in the first place.
This is a great post for a thought experiment. But I doubt you'd be up for the intellectual rigor. Let's take the "It's her body, not yours" to its logical conclusion, and see if this holds up.

Just where does this distinction end for you? What is okay, and what isn't? Is it okay for me to cheat on my wife, because it's my body not hers? (And sex is quite temporary, not permanent like a tat)
 

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Re: Fiancées tattoo.

She had her deal-breaker which he willingly agreed to.
He had his deal-breaker which she willingly agreed to.
Neither were coerced or pressured to agree to each others' deal-breakers.
Then, she wanted to go back on her word to get a tattoo, and
by doing so, she demonstrated that her promise was worthless.

But he's trying to control her! Sharia Law! We must smash the patriarchy! lmao
 

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Discussion Starter #423 (Edited)
Re: Fiancées tattoo.

I had to go home last night to do some upgrading on one of my software pieces.I worked through the night and then couldn't sleep.I decided to bring my neighbours dog for a walk in the woods nearby,there is a lake as well and he loves to swim.When I got back to my car my exf's mother was leaning on the front of my car and she said we needed to talk.
I asked her how she knew I was there and she said she walks in the woods most mornings..To be fair she does a lot of walking.
She asked me did I not think I had been a bit over the top in the last couple of weeks and started giving me ****e about how my ex had learned her lesson and if I don't wise up some other man will "snap her up".This is the woman who originally told me not to give her daughter an inch,that I do so much for her with nothing in return.I said you must be really desperate to get her married off but it wasnt going to be to me.
She never even acknowledged what I said but then asked me have I considered investing in her daughters studio.I was f****** gobsmacked and asked her why would I do that.She said my ex wants to upgrade the exercise area into a state of the art gym with something called vacuumn thread mills and anti gravity thread mills with high definition screens all round using ifit technology.
I asked her why she couldn't get a business loan and help her daughter if that was what she wanted.Her answer was it was the least I could for my ex and her son to make sure they were financially secure.I was still standing there with the dog and he was wet so I wanted to leave so my last comment was is it a loan or a gift she wants and did she forget I was not the boy's father.
I told her get off my f****** car and got in and drove away.
Curiosity got the better of me though and I checked out these thread mills,they are hugely expensive and breakdown fairly often,she would need maybe thirty for what she wants so along with the screens she was probably looking for around half a million of a loan.
NOT A CHANCE!
 

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Discussion Starter #425
Re: Fiancées tattoo.

i guess you know what your role would have been in the family...a personal ATM machine!

well i guess we know who wears the pants in that family.
I did a quick calculation on the value of her business and I think for half a mill I would be entitled to about fifty five percent of the business.
That means her poisonous employees would work for me and I could sack them all.
Karma.
Just a thought...
 

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Discussion Starter #426
Re: Fiancées tattoo.

You're out of control on this one. It is HER body NOT YOURS. If you're this controlling with this then she's better off without you. If she wants and desires a tattoo then that's on her. She doesn't need your approval to get one. We don't live under Sharia Law and you can't control her. If you don't marry her because she got a tattoo then you never loved her in the first place.
She can get full sleeves, a tramp stamp and both legs tattooed if she wants.
I won't have to look at them.
 

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Re: Fiancées tattoo.

Women can opine that they want to date/marry men who are tall, dark, and handsome, and no one will bat an eye. However, if someone like the OP says he doesn't want to marry a woman with tattoos, all of a sudden he's being controlling and close-minded. His preference is right for him, just as a woman's preference on her choice of physical attributes is right for her.
 

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Re: Fiancées tattoo.

Women can opine that they want to date/marry men who are tall, dark, and handsome, and no one will bat an eye. However, if someone like the OP says he doesn't want to marry a woman with tattoos, all of a sudden he's being controlling and close-minded. His preference is right for him, just as a woman's preference on her choice of physical attributes is right for her.


Actually, tall dark and handsome are genetic traits that biologically favor better offspring. So women are genetically disposed to prefer those traits. Tattoos are just a choice. IMO.




Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
 

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Discussion Starter #429
Re: Fiancées tattoo.

I am tall dark and handsome.
My counsellor tells me I am narcissistic.
I don't know what she means.
I think she's hitting on me.




I'm joking,she would kill me if she seen this.
 

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Re: Fiancées tattoo.

60%!!.Thats almost half!.


I'm joking.

That is really depressing though,why are so many people cheating on their (supposedly) loved ones.
As I said earlier my parents were married over forty years and my brother thirty and counting.
I think that's why I was so blinkered throughout my engagement,I just wanted what they had.
My parents were happy their entire life and my brother is still as much in love with his wife as he
was the day they married.She must be some kind of Saint to put up with that prick all this time.
Well it's three days and no contact,I got the locks changed on my house just to be on the safe side
because when she realises that I won't be around at the weekend she will go ape.

60% Cheat? Rididculous. The actual number is about 30%.Yes, thats bad enough.

Not that long ago you would have gotten far different advice on this forum.

What your fiance was doing over the years was sh!t testing you. Google it. You failed over and over and now you have failed the ultimate sh!t test.(fitness test)

From what I've read up through page 26, no one has given you the 2x4 to the side of your head you need.

Download the book MARRIED MAN SEX LIFE PRIMER from amazon.com

You need to do this immediately as somewhere along the line, your man card was pulled.

You have me wondering if you have sabotaged this wedding on purpose or your fiance finally decided even though she wanted to marry you you wouldn't be a good example to her son.
 

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Discussion Starter #431
Re: Fiancées tattoo.

60% Cheat? Rididculous. The actual number is about 30%.Yes, thats bad enough.

Not that long ago you would have gotten far different advice.

What your fiance was doing over the years was **** testing you. Google it. You failed over and over and now you have failed the ultimate **** test.(fitness test)

From what I've read up through page 26, no one has given you the 2x4 to the side of your head you need.

Download the book MARRIED MAN SEX LIFE PRIMER from amazon.com

You need to do this immediately as somewhere along the line, your man card was pulled.

You have me wondering if you have sabotaged this wedding on purpose or your fiance finally decided even though she wanted to marry you you wouldn't be a good example to her son.
I freely admitted that my previous life was not exactly husband material.From the day I met my ex I never touched another woman and I have no reason to lie on this.I thought we were fine for a long time until this episode came up and then I realised I was been taken for a ride.Im not sure what you mean by the two by four comment.
 

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Re: Fiancées tattoo.

I have changed the locks since last week even though she had given me back my keys.My house is fitted with the most up to date smart technology money can buy with my phone I can drop shutters on every door and window,turn off electricity,gas and water and it is in a private estate so if she tried to get in she would be arrested for trespassing.I don't think it will come to that though.
I have texted,emailed and left voice mails to tell her we are done.It hasn't stopped her "friends" from sniffing around though.I am seriously thinking of selling my house though and moving somewhere else.I can work from anywhere in the world once I have a phone and Internet connection.Problem is I don't know many people outside of where I live so I would be even lonelier than I am now.
I can't remember who first told me to get IC but it was the best advice I have ever had.My counsellor cuts right to the chase,no bull****,and I don't think she is too impressed with me or my lifestyle.But she is less impressed with my former lifestyle so maybe she sees some hope for me.I,would hate to be her husband trying to explain where he was until three in the morning though lol.She was adamant that if I continued to see my exf then our sessions were over.She is trying to push me on my relationship with my brother but I think that is a lost cause.She has backed off(for now anyway)with questions about Ally and I'm glad because I do not want to go there.I am still going to take a trip to Scotland and may stay in Europe for a while but I don't want to stop my counselling sessions yet as I see thing far clearly now and realise I was been taken for a ride by my exf.
You have mostly girl friends. Taking mostly women's advice on this thread and your counselor is a girl. Great Ceasar's ghost. Are you for real?

What happened to the men on this website?
 

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Re: Fiancées tattoo.

At this stage I couldn't give a f*** if she screws the Dallas Cowboys as long as I don't have to listen to her telling me it's my fault.
It is your fault. You've let a lot of folks lead you down a rabbit hole. Political correctness run amok.
 

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Re: Fiancées tattoo.

I freely admitted that my previous life was not exactly husband material.From the day I met my ex I never touched another woman and I have no reason to lie on this.I thought we were fine for a long time until this episode came up and then I realised I was been taken for a ride.Im not sure what you mean by the two by four comment.
I repeat, google sh!t test. All those times you acquiesed and backed down was a failure in the eyes of a woman. You finally stood up for yourself...great. but then you let the bulls horns go and ran.

The MMSLP book isn't about sex, its about how a man stays attractive to a woman. By constantly letting her having her way and belittling you, which you deserved, you became overly domestisized and hen pecked. Finally you reacted properly and she fell into line. Great. Then you started following bad advise that has destroyed what could have been a great little family with two people you love.

Woman counselor for a man? SPIT
 

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Discussion Starter #437
Re: Fiancées tattoo.

I repeat, google sh!t test. All those times you acquiesed and backed down was a failure in the eyes of a woman. You finally stood up for yourself...great. but then you let the bulls horns go and ran.

The MMSLP book isn't about sex, its about how a man stays attractive to a woman. By constantly letting her having her way and belittling you, which you deserved, you became overly domestisized and hen pecked. Finally you reacted properly and she fell into line. Great. Then you started following bad advise that has destroyed what could have been a great little family with two people you love.

Woman counselor for a man? SPIT
You are over simplifying this.There was a lot more going on than maybe even I realised.It turns out that she wanted me to invest in her business all along,she seen me as a cash machine.I may be a F***** idiot in my love life but that does not extend to my business life. You seem to have a problem with women in professional fields.Do you think because my counsellor is a woman that she would give me bad advice.This woman came recommended by a lawyer who I have the highest respect for,he told me she has saved many relationships from divorce.Even she could tell me that my relationship was never going to work.
It's a moot point anyway because I believe when I met her I was actually depressed,my best friends in the world had left and both my parents died within a few days of them leaving.
I jumped from constant one night stands or relationships lasting a few weeks to a five year exclusive relationship.I was looking for something that I did not find.
 

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Re: Fiancées tattoo.

That woman did not play and wait five years to hook you into investing in her business. She wasted five years on you when she could have found a more stable man to be a husband and dad for her son. She's the one that's been played.
 

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Re: Fiancées tattoo.

Btw, you're lady counselor has determined you are a narcissist. Have you done any reading on that. The way you've described yourself you're anything but.

If she's correct you can't truly love someone and you should never marry.

Although, the way you're treating the woman and her son now reeks of selfishness.
 

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Re: Fiancées tattoo.

That woman did not play and wait five years to hook you into investing in her business. She wasted five years on you when she could have found a more stable man to be a husband and dad for her son. She's the one that's been played.
That woman has said that she wanted Andy to take care of her and her son. In other words, she wanted the financial security that he can provide. However, she has shown time and time again that she is not a safe partner for him. Her own mother even told him to not let her walk all over him. If she can't honor her word about a simple agreement on not getting tattoos, how can the OP expect her to honor her marriage vows? The vast majority of the posters seem to agree that the OP should run from her, as she's not marriage material.
 
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