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Discussion Starter #401 (Edited)
Re: Fiancées tattoo.

That's harassment. I'm sorry she's turned out to be such a psycho.

I'm sorry, but it looks like you are right and you'll have to get a new number.
89 text messages since yesterday.
 

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Re: Fiancées tattoo.

89 text messages since yesterday.
She's kicking herself. So close to the wedding and she screws up her life with the foolish tattoo idea.
 

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Re: Fiancées tattoo.

89 text messages since yesterday.
Have you told her to stop?
This is outrageous. I would be angry if someone did that to me.
At this point, it would be easier to have your number changed. What a pain in the butt.
I bet you never expected this. Thank God you averted the disaster of marrying her. I can only imagine what kind of marriage you would have had. Wow. What a blessing to realize this now and not after you signed the marriage certificate.
 

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Discussion Starter #406
Re: Fiancées tattoo.

I spoke informally to a lawyer today about going the legal route.He thinks that by the time a judge agrees to hear the case my ex will have given up.I have one more session with my counsellor tomorrow and then I am out of here.I never realised she was so crazy,I was stupid to get involved with her but I was at a low point in my life when I met her.
 

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Discussion Starter #411
Re: Fiancées tattoo.

Maybe your ex dodged a bullet that you broke up with her.
Maybe so but I made my feelings clear from day one that I could not accept tattoos on her.At this stage my phobia about tattoos has probably saved me from years of misery and a fortune in alimony.
 

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Re: Fiancées tattoo.

Maybe so but I made my feelings clear from day one that I could not accept tattoos on her.At this stage my phobia about tattoos has probably saved me from years of misery and a fortune in alimony.


As long as you were clear from the beginning, then you don't need to justify yourself. You both had ground rules in place, and your just lucky that yours saved you from many years of heartache.

How are you feeling about it all? Have you looked into getting a new number? I don't think she's going to leave you alone now that she realises that your serious.
 

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Discussion Starter #413 (Edited)
Re: Fiancées tattoo.

As long as you were clear from the beginning, then you don't need to justify yourself. You both had ground rules in place, and your just lucky that yours saved you from many years of heartache.

How are you feeling about it all? Have you looked into getting a new number? I don't think she's going to leave you alone now that she realises that your serious.
Yes I got a new phone yesterday and only my family and a couple of colleagues have the number.I have an answering service taking all other calls and messages.I have a session with my counsellor today then I am out of here for a few days.I am going to a hotel near where Ally and Sam lives and I am meeting them for dinner tonight.Sam has completely backtracked on my exf and told me her amateur attempt at counselling was a mistake.I think Ally has been on her case about her ripping into me but we will see how it goes.The two of them don't seem to be getting on so hot from what I have observed and Ally let it slip that Sam may be thinking she is a bringing more to the relationship than Ally is.Sam is far better educated than Ally and earns a lot more but they split all the finances equally except the apt that Sam owns outright.She does not know that Ally is fairly wealthy because she has one percent of my company but swore me to secrecy about it years ago.It is supposed to be an emergency fund in case Sam bails,then Ally will have enough money to buy her own place.This is why I can always trust Ally because she trusts me to look after her money.This was not a gift,when I set up on my own Ally was an unpaid secretary for a long while and I always intended her to have a share of the business.None of us thought it was going to bring in so much money though.
My exf is still trying to contact me but I have her blocked everywhere.She contacted my brother to try an get him on board but that will lead nowhere,he knows better than go behind my back.My counsellor has agreed to meet at my house today so I don't have to go into town,her office is very near my exf's health studio so I do not want any of her employees seeing me and telling her I'm in town.
My answering service tells me I'm getting about twelve texts every hour from a few different numbers but all of them looking for a private talk.That is my biggest fear,meeting her,because my brain seems to switch off when she is around.A previous poster said when she is near me I think with the wrong head and he was right.
If I can avoid her today I will not be around for a while and she will not know where I am(I don't know myself yet)
 

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Discussion Starter #414
Re: Fiancées tattoo.

well the text messages dried up as soon as my exf realised I wasn't around,she must have used a dozen of her friends and employees phones.I have decided to stay away from my house for another few days,I'm staying in a hotel in the next city.Her very last voicemail mentioned that the boy was missing me terribly and I owed it to him to give us another chance.I know this is emotional blackmail but it doesn't make it feel any easier.
My counsellor tells me I should just take a long vacation on my own somewhere there are lots of people.I think she feels I am depressed but I'm not really.Its like I have been in a fog but it is starting to lift very slowly.When I can face my exf without wanting to punch her or f*** her I will know I am ok.
 

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Re: Fiancées tattoo.

She's doing it to get an emotional response from you. The boy wouldn't be missing you if she didn't f*ck it up. So it's her issue, not yours. It's harsh, but the minute she meets with you, she will try her hardest to get back with you. Guaranteed.
 

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Re: Fiancées tattoo.

You're out of control on this one. It is HER body NOT YOURS. If you're this controlling with this then she's better off without you. If she wants and desires a tattoo then that's on her. She doesn't need your approval to get one. We don't live under Sharia Law and you can't control her. If you don't marry her because she got a tattoo then you never loved her in the first place.
 

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Re: Fiancées tattoo.

You're out of control on this one. It is HER body NOT YOURS. If you're this controlling with this then she's better off without you. If she wants and desires a tattoo then that's on her. She doesn't need your approval to get one. We don't live under Sharia Law and you can't control her. If you don't marry her because she got a tattoo then you never loved her in the first place.
What an asinine comment. The fact that it's her body was never up for debate. The real issue here is she agreed to not get any tattoo and then she changed her mind and disrespected him in front of her friends. The issue here is about integrity and respecting your partner. It has nothing to do with whether he loves her or not. She has the right to get any tattoo she wants, and he has the right to enforce his boundary by walking away.

Going by your logic, husbands and wives can give their bodies to anyone they want, because it's their bodies, and their partners have no say in it. Wait, what? You disagree? Maybe it is really about holding ourselves to the promises and vows we made, huh? Maybe it's about respecting our partners, huh?

It amazes me how many people use your myopic logic when the issue of tats come up. Setting up a strawman argument, knock it down, and proclaim your enlightenment.
 

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Re: Fiancées tattoo.

You're out of control on this one. It is HER body NOT YOURS. If you're this controlling with this then she's better off without you. If she wants and desires a tattoo then that's on her. She doesn't need your approval to get one. We don't live under Sharia Law and you can't control her. If you don't marry her because she got a tattoo then you never loved her in the first place.
Oh good lord, this is as bad as dredging up Hitler. Good job.

It's about setting up boundaries and what you accept. I get people whine about Tattoos being trivial, but THEY TALKED IT OVER and she agreed. So, she has every right to get one and he has every right to end the relationship over her decision.

It has nothing to do with Sharia Law or any other gender biased idea you can develop.
 
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