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Hello, I'm new to sites like this so please bear with me. When me and my spouse got together my ex wife started alienating me from my kids. I was going through alot of depression and suicidal thoughts during this. I was considering going back to my ex wife during this time and began the process, because I figured it was better to be lonely than to be without my kids. My current spouse assured me that it would be ok that I would get through it and be happy in both areas of my life. I made it through this and managed to get my kids back. We and my spouse got married and I couldn't have been happier. (She was right). But now she throws all of this in my face, she has stopped initiating sex and it is definitely not the same as before. She sleeps all day and stays away from me. We have zero communication everything I do is wrong in some way. I understand she went through alot as well, but if she had a big issue with what I was dealing with and her included why marry Me? She even makes sex now like some kind of reward program and says why would I reward you when you havnt done this or when you said something like that. It just takes the love and intact out of it. I love this woman and I refuse to divorce unless it is absolutely what she wants. I'm just tired of feeling lonely all the time.
 

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You are now having suicidal thoughts for the second time. This is not a healthy response to problems that life throws at you.
Please seek out some help for yourself with either a counselor or psychiatrist.Maybe if you begin thinking clearly about your life, without your mind being clouded by thoughts of suicide you can make the right decisions with regards to your marriage.
Good luck.
 

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You and only you are the master of your own fate. We teach others how they can treat us for the most part.

No one is going to fix this but you and laying in the victims chair won't get you a damn thing.

You should wake up now
 

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Seriously get some professional counseling. Also may I suggest reading Glover's book no more Mr nice guy. It is a book to help men become more integrated and less dependent upon the emotional validation some co-dependent men have with women in their lives.
 

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Welcome to TAM....we hope we can help! I’m sorry that things are going so rough in your life.

Have you had a sit down heart to heart with her about the things you are saying here? If not, set aside a specific time with her and let her know you need to discuss something very serious. Then pour your heart out to her. Let her know you want to save your marriage and be open to hear what she is unhappy about also. Then devise a plan to work on it together.

PS- why does she sleep all day?
 

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"We need to talk and fix this, or I am leaving."
That's what you need to say to her, but don't let it just be a threat. If she refuses to help you work on the marriage and fix things, then you will have to walk out the door. She will straighten up then and ask you, if not beg you, not to leave. As long as you feel sorry for yourself and keep taking this crap from her, she will keep doing it. That's the way human beings are. But when you put a stop to it, then she will stop. You need to find your confidence because women need a confident man. As long as you are a whiny, suicidal pushover, women will continue to push. It's just that simple.
 

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could you give us a brief timeline of events...

the episode with the kids and ex-wife
the depression
when you and your new girlfriend met and dated
when you got married
when you start to see changes in her behavior.

trying to understand what brought on this behavior, it's either internal or external.
 

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You need to stop entertaining thoughts of suicide.

"Children Who Lose a Parent to Suicide More Likely to Die the Same Way." https://www.hopkinsmedicine.org/news/media/releases/children_who_lose_a_parent_to_suicide_more_likely_to_die_the_same_way

Your life is in your own hands. Saying that you would not divorce your wife, but you would consider killing yourself doesn't make any sense. You can take control of your life and not continue to live like this. To start with, consider what your options really are for making things better. You are not trapped with your current wife. You do have options.

Also, as others are asking about, I recommend staying here and answering questions. People here will help you get to the bottom of what is going on and to begin working towards resolution. There could be something wrong with your wife that you two can work together to resolve or maybe not. You won't know unless you stop thinking negatively about the situation and become solution oriented. You can do this. More importantly, your children need you to do something about this.
 
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