Help
Backstory
I was in a long term sexless marriage which I ended 2.5 years ago.
Am now in a relationship with a wonderful man that I have fallen in love with.
Sex is great, the connection is great.
We don't live together and both have busy lives with kids, work etc,
The problem is me. Before I met him I was dating around, nothing serious just sex and fun, I was always in control but now I am in a situation that I hope is very long term and some issues are coming up.
The problem is that I seem to have some irrational fears of sexual rejection and I need to get past this in order to be whole and healthy.
eg we cannot see each other for a week due to circumstances and a few days ago we joked on the phone about having a secret meet up in the middle of the night. I got excited about it but the reality is that ATM it is too hard due to having the kids here. No bid deal right?
But I then start to think that he has rejected me, it is irrational, we cannot meet up but I read it as he just doesn't want me.
I know he does but the part of my mind that is scared by past experiences has taken over.
I need some resources, strategies and help to get past this thinking. The logical part of me knows that it is not him saying "no" to me it is our busy lives but I find myself going into a weird place in my mind, reliving the years of not being wanted.
Does anyone understand what I mean?
Backstory
I was in a long term sexless marriage which I ended 2.5 years ago.
Am now in a relationship with a wonderful man that I have fallen in love with.
Sex is great, the connection is great.
We don't live together and both have busy lives with kids, work etc,
The problem is me. Before I met him I was dating around, nothing serious just sex and fun, I was always in control but now I am in a situation that I hope is very long term and some issues are coming up.
The problem is that I seem to have some irrational fears of sexual rejection and I need to get past this in order to be whole and healthy.
eg we cannot see each other for a week due to circumstances and a few days ago we joked on the phone about having a secret meet up in the middle of the night. I got excited about it but the reality is that ATM it is too hard due to having the kids here. No bid deal right?
But I then start to think that he has rejected me, it is irrational, we cannot meet up but I read it as he just doesn't want me.
I know he does but the part of my mind that is scared by past experiences has taken over.
I need some resources, strategies and help to get past this thinking. The logical part of me knows that it is not him saying "no" to me it is our busy lives but I find myself going into a weird place in my mind, reliving the years of not being wanted.
Does anyone understand what I mean?