At 2-3x/week, you're probably already at the high end of the typical range for a 25-year relationship with kids. Keep in mind what you're trying to achieve is not very typical unless the relationship has been passionate all along. It's like you have the goose who lays golden eggs, but you're frustrated because the eggs aren't big enough.We’re at 2-3 times per week. All of it my initiation. I am NOT lacking in a “physical need” capacity. I’m looking for more enthusiasm, excitement, adventurousness, activeness. I can’t help but wonder if more of that is within her, but restrained for reasons I can’t understand.
One thing that can likely be achieved is to have sex with more emotional connection. She may not be more passionate, but she could find the sex more enjoyable and fulfilling. You can help a lot by being more emotionally engaged on a regular basis. Like, when she talks to you, really listen and want to be there like you did at the start of the relationship. But don't do it as a manipulation tactic to get more sex. Do it because you love her and want her to be happy.I hate the binary path here. Could there not be a third way? Perhaps I’m greedy, wanting the same wife, the same life, AND a more exciting sex life. I’m not willing to throw in the towel just yet (although there have been days where I’ve sworn to myself that I’m done trying).
I also can't help wondering if the TRT is amping up your sex drive and making you more single-focused. Why are you on that? If you had to choose between staying on TRT or your marriage, which would you pick?