I can honestly say that after almost a decade together I am at a total loss for what to do anymore. We met when we were 17 and 16, moved in together when we went to college, and have been together since. We don't have any kids. We both love each other, but sometimes love just isn't enough. It seems like we have done nothing but grow apart every day. I have thought about divorce, but she is a good person, and I do still care about her. Both of us have issues with the other, and it appears as though we are almost polar opposites that happen to have made it work for a while. It just gets old fighting everything. I would imagine she is just as tired of hearing me complain as I am about having to gripe to her about everything. She hates sex, doesn't cook, barely helps out around the house, can't keep track of bills to help pay any of them, and has basically no ambition to improve our lives in any way. She's the type of person that is completely okay with the house looking like a bomb went off inside, constantly getting late fees on bills, and eating fast food all of the time. She had some of these issues when we got together, but they have escalated enormously over time. Don't take my words the wrong way; I don't think I'm perfect, and I know very well that her issues could be worse. We don't cheat on each other, as far as I know, and as I said, she is a good person with a good heart. But, for anyone who has dealt with these kinds of issues on a daily basis for such a long time, you will know what I mean when I say that it can take as much a toll on the relationship as a cheater or someone with a mean streak. I'm not even saying she is wrong to live that way. I'm sure there is a man out there who is just like her, and maybe they would be happy together living in poverty, with roaches climbing all over their belongings. That man is not me. I don't expect perfection, but having to choose to manage everything in our lives 100% of the time or living in that kind of environment is ridiculous. I hate having to manage the lives of two people with barely any help. If she would just do one thing right I would be okay with her being a good person who has some faults. If she would just cook well (or even try for that matter), be a clean person, or enjoy sex more. I don't know why you would give up a guy who doesn't cheat on you, doesn't hit you, doesn't ask for odd sexual favors, doesn't expect you to do everything (just meet me somewhere near halfway), and can provide a good stable life for you and possible children in the future. I've tried being sweet and affectionate, demanding, careless and numb, but nothing improves her outlook on our relationship. I just don't know what to do. I don't even look that bad. Are some women just like that? She suffers from depression, but won't take any steps to remedy the issue. She's like that with everything, just simply won't put forth any effort to correct problems. All she does is watch everything burn up, and then whine about how she can't do anything right. Why is it that some people cannot help themselves in any way whatsoever? Sorry for the long rant, but I very much need some advice. I feel like my will to live is seeping out of me. I'm so lost, confused, and frustrated. I don't know what to do.