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Buddy's wife always posting pictures of them together on their facebook, nice anniversary post, everything that a normal loving wife would do, thats what got us so confused. Could it be low self esteem issues ? is she gaslighting him ?
It’s an attempt to convince the world — and maybe even herself — that their marriage and life together is better than it is. Hell, maybe him too.

And yeah, she might even be gaslighting him.

Either way, I’d be aghast if my wife were so content with — and maybe even obsessed with — inauthenticity. I’d think any man would be.

Guessing your buddy doesn’t stand up to his wife very often.
 

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Discussion Starter · #22 ·
It’s an attempt to convince the world — and maybe even herself — that their marriage and life together is better than it is. Hell, maybe him too.

And yeah, she might even be gaslighting him.

Either way, I’d be aghast if my wife were so content with — and maybe even obsessed with — inauthenticity. I’d think any man would be.

Guessing your buddy doesn’t stand up to his wife very often.
:confused::confused::confused::confused::confused: WoW I never looked at it this way, he defiantly says one day is really good and a day or two she acts depressed and withdrawn....
 

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:confused::confused::confused::confused::confused: WoW I never looked at it this way, he defiantly says one day is really good and a day or two she acts depressed and withdrawn....
She’s still obsessed with OM, man.
 

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Thats kinda where I was, why does she care what OBS looks like? You got back with your husband, isn't that what you wanted? Just didnt know if there is some other "women" thing going on, why she's so worried about the OM wife
She is lying! She got dumped, and your friend is second best Plan B or even C, very said to see the state of many men these days, no self esteem and no self respect!
 

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No, WW left the OM first to go back to husband, guess the trial run didn't work out lol
$5 says OM was having sex with his wife and left your buddy's wife to go back home or buddys wife found out he was still having sex with his wife and ended it. The way she's acting she's still so hung up on OM it's ridiculous.



Buddy's wife always posting pictures of them together on their facebook, nice anniversary post, everything that a normal loving wife would do, thats what got us so confused. Could it be low self esteem issues ? is she gaslighting him ?
She's constantly comparing herself to the OM's wife on social media. She posts happy couple pics because she's hoping her OM will see them and be jealous. She's also keeping up appearances. After all, OM went back to his wife. He's not an option. So, she has to make going back to Plan B with her tail between her legs work or at least appear to work. She's insecure and has low self esteem right now because her man picked his wife over her.
 

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Ask your buddy does he like being plan B.
You could also mention that plan B never becomes plan A.
I don't know, Andy. If the guy suddenly learned that he would be inheriting a few million, I would bet that this woman would be all over fakebook proclaiming how she is totally in love with plan B and might even increase her efforts in the bedroom. Her new pics would show sparkling eyes with dollar signs.


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talking with a friend that is going though reconciliation he tells me his wife "that had the affair" is obsessed with OM wife. She compares herself constantly to her, weight, hair, how many pictures she post. He says she has said "I want her to be miserable" and "If she's not miserable i might as well be miserable myself" Im happy to have this friend that is going through some of the same stuff as me but he wont post on her or read any of it so I wanted to ask you guys what you though. Thanks
I think, your "friends" wife is still carrying around a torch for her OM. She has not gotten over it at all.

Her comparing with the OBS and posting her pictures online just proves this point. I think that the OM has an alternate account and is subscribed/friends with her on those online sites where she posts pictures. She's posting her pictures online where she goes to extra lengths to say that "hey, look I'm much better than your wife, who would you ignore me?"
 

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My wife had two affairs and one of those guys was married during their affair (twice actually). My wife doesn't sit around stalking their social media. We ran into one of the OBS's recently and my wife just about died. There is certainly no jealousy or hate there.

The other guy has never been married but my wife doesn't care about who he dates, other than how if affects their child.

Your friends WW still has feelings for the OM. Why he's choosing to accept that, who knows. She needs to block the OBS (and OM if she hasn't already), and get them out of her head. Right now she's still sort of in the affair, in a way.
Did his wife know about the affair or is she still in the dark?
 

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Did his wife know about the affair or is she still in the dark?
They are divorced now but yes, she knows about the affair. My wife told her back in Dec/2018 and I talked to her several times after that and we swapped evidence. So she's well aware of what happened.
 

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Did your friend say why his wife came back, if she clearly was still into the OM? Sounds like she left the OM, came back to your friend (her husband) and wishes she could have your friend and the OM. The tangled webs we weave....:cautious:
 
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Ok, secret insight here. All OW have serious issues. But most understand and know that they can’t hold a candle to the wife/girlfriend, and couldn’t look at a picture too long without turning away. Because it eats you. You bump into her, you freeze, a picture shows up, you block delete, want to burn your device.

This one is UNHINGED. Bunny-boiler, unstable, crazy crazy crazy. Still in love with him, and wants to be the wife. Wants to dress like her, look like her, use her brush and wear her shoes. Bit like Assia Wevil. Sylvia’s suicide was understandable, but look how far Assia took things… blamed the ghost of Sylvia.
 

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:confused::confused::confused::confused::confused: WoW I never looked at it this way, he defiantly says one day is really good and a day or two she acts depressed and withdrawn....
This might be wild and very much off the mark observation.

I think she's being inauthentic self. So, whenever she is putting on a persona of who she is not, it depletes her "batteries" or energy if you will. So, likely she can't quite keep putting up the facade all the time. Then she realizes all the fun she had with OM and then he didn't even want her. So, she's acting depressed and withdrawn.
 
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