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Hi,

I was wondering if people of Christian faith are more likely to stay in a bad marriage because of pressure from their pastor and church to stay together at any cost because marriage is sacred according to the bible? Does anyone have any experience with this? Have you been guilt tripped into staying by your church and it was the wrong thing to do in hindsight? Do you think this is a noble ideal or not?

Also why is so hard for some people to run away from a bad marriage and destructive relationship? What makes people stay and hold on when they would be better off single? Any thoughts would be much appreciated.
 

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The bible does provide grounds for divorce.

My personal view, as a Christian, is that I made a promise and I intend to keep it. Even after my wife's affair (which biblically gave me the right to divorce) I stayed for the kids I would say I was being committed to my responsibilities as a father, but if you want t o see that as a guilt trip that is ok.

I had a very bad marriage for some years. It eventually improved and is now good, though not perfect. I feel that committing to stay and work at the relationship was a good thing for me, and vindication that the Christian teaching works. However I am not saying it is that simple or that every story has a happy ending.
 

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There are so many different theologies and doctrines in Christian faith. For most bible-believing, bible-teaching Christian churches that teach the doctrine of salvation through Jesus Christ alone, and that God hates divorce, there are pretty much 2 valid reasons for divorce/separation: (1) cheating/adultery, (2) physical abuse. The cheating/adultery is scripture supported. Physical abuse, some say separation only, so that you can live a peaceful life, which is supported by scripture.

All other marriage problems: work it out!

This is what most bible teaching churches teach.
 

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I'm a regular on Christian Forums (although not religious myself), I find that a lot of people posting in their marriage section have big problems within their marriage but refuse to consider divorce as an option because it's not condoned by the Church. Even on the grounds of cheating and abuse, they don't want to leave, most of the time not only because of their faith but because there is kids involved (which doesn't even make sense to me, really, because I know that a peaceful separation would be much easier for their children compared to years of them fighting with each other and staying together).
 

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Heck my parents weren't even Christian but I heard my mom say on many occasions that she took her vows seriously. My dad was abusive and drove me away but by gosh she stood by him until he died a few months ago.

Thanks to her keeping her 'vows' I spent years and thousands of dollars on therapy to recover from HIS and hers abuse. Living in a broken home is way worse than coming from one.
 

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As a Christian I think there is a bit more of a tendency to try and stay in a marriage but the divorce rate in protestant churches pretty close to non Christians.

Christians are subject to the same temptations and struggle with the same junk everyone does. Church attenders drink, engage in porn, betray their spouses... not much difference between the world and church in North America.
 
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