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Ok well at least I'm not in that situation? Or at least things aren't that bad?

I know, I probably shouldn't do that but sometimes it does help to keep things in perspective and not obsess about every little problem we have.

Or am I a bad person? :scratchhead:
 

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Sometimes ...

Sometimes I just think 'Woah - how on earth do people get into that sort of situation???'

Then I run away, grateful that it's not me ...

Am I a bad person too?
 

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I've been in some really bad situations in my life. The difference I frequently see here is people who post and remain stuck in those situations. I suppose fear of a known evil is more comfortable than fear of an unknown evil.

Still, why keep complaining about a crummy relationship, but do nothing more than vent?:scratchhead:
 

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All the time. I still get surprised by threads. Some I think are trolls making up stories just for the reaction, but other stories seem truthful. I'm so thankful my relationship problems are so minor.
 

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Most of the ones I read are usually always pretty bad. But I hang out in the CWI and Divorce section a lot.
 

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No, unfortunately I'm in a mode of thinking after every thread I read, "Well, that explains that!" and I realize that things are almost following a script in our marriage. But it's good to learn this now rather than later.
 

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Absolutely every day and I believe that is why I come back - I guess, I think hope, maybe I can help someone. I subscribe to the edict "To those to whom much is given, much is expected". I and my family have been blessed indeed and I feel a sense to pay that forward.
 

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Yes I do think that OP but also aware many would think the same about my story.

So many of the threads where the husband is being an inconsiderate, selfish pig make me want to burst. There are just some behaviours and situations that leave me thanking The Universe that isn't my lot in life.
 

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These threads ought to be mandatory reading for anyone considering marriage. The faint-of-heart would abandon the plan.
Oh I feel like TAM has saved me from a future I don't want. Have never been married, and am currently single. I'm only 28. No marriage for me thanks. Have learned more about relationships on this site in the past 3 months then I've learned in the past 15 years.
 

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Oh I feel like TAM has saved me from a future I don't want. Have never been married, and am currently single. I'm only 28. No marriage for me thanks. Have learned more about relationships on this site in the past 3 months then I've learned in the past 15 years.
See I feel this part is :(... My parents divorced, they were just not compatible... it was a train wreck.... but I did NOT allow that to sway MY dreams... No way.. I think if people are observant, we can learn much from others experiences....some valuable lessons there...

Realize what WORKS for YOU....realize your deal breakers... take time with your significant others, no rushing... get vulnerable, dig deep.....and don't settle... marriage can be your greatest dream if you find that "right" person.. that compliments who you are.

I hope not every single person who graces this place will forgo Marriage. Though it does seem the institution is slowly dying.
 

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No, I don't really take that approach. No one is perfect so we all live in the hell of our own making. What works for one, doesn't always work for another. There is a lid for every pot.

And the most important...

Some people are just happier being miserable.

However, finding your own gratitude does not make you a bad person at all!!! Happiness is relative and we've all got some.
 

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Ok well at least I'm not in that situation? Or at least things aren't that bad?

I know, I probably shouldn't do that but sometimes it does help to keep things in perspective and not obsess about every little problem we have.

Or am I a bad person? :scratchhead:
I am thankful for my wife is what I think.
 

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I felt guilty at first, not being married and "only" dealing with an inappropriate relationship /EA. But the wisdom here has useful in formulating thought and rigor towards relationships.

In the outside world, you will get the old "what's wrong with your partner hanging is his female friend from time to time" and well, if you're a softie like me, you'll back down and take the heat.
 
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