My husband and I have been together for about 8 years now. I moved in with him and his parents at 18.We got married when I was 20 and he was 21. I'm 23 and he's 24 now, I have a 4 year old with another one on the way. We are looking to buy our first house here soon. We've lived in an apartment before for a year in 2009, but as soon as he got a chance to move back to his family's house, he took it. His older brother bought a house for their mother and it happened to be a duplex(top and bottom). My husband wanted to move out of our apartment and move back in with them. I didnt want to. I was happy. He said the bottom floor was going to be finished for us to move in and its just like the apartment. We would have rent with no bills and his mom and dad would pay bills. What was I thinking to believe him? We end up having to stay upstairs till WE could afford carpet and everything for the downstairs, plus we had to take care of the bills, the yearly taxes and insurance on the house. Now his parents travel alot so she usually doesnt stay in one place for very long . So my husband and I have to the WHOLE house to ourselves half the time. (We dont have a front door to the downstairs) its now 2012 and everything downstairs is finish EXCEPT... the kitchen and bathroom. My daughter has her own room and so does me and my husband. We finally bought our first living room set couple weeks ago. Before I got pregnant I was working alot as well as my husband. His mother had made a comment to me that my husband and I cant afford a house right now. I make 11.5 and husband was making 11.5. What does she mean we dont make enough? Since we have bought our first living room set;the house(bottom floor) seems more like a home and it makes me feel more secure. Here's one of my problems. Since his mother left. My husband takes a shower, sleeps and watches TV upstairs plus he eats most of the time...upstairs we dont have a kitchen so its worse. To me its like whats the point of buying furniture, or fixing this place. His excuse for not sleeping in our bed is that it hurts his back. His mom has those pillowtop beds. When i complain to him about sleeping with me, he will sleep with me but sneak upstairs in the middle of the night. My parents are frustrated with him, we also have 2 dogs, that makes it four people we are respondsible for. ugh!!! What can I do to make him understand that im tired of this. How can I find a sollution to this pity problem my husband has?