[LeGenDary_Man]

So if left a guy on read for 3 days after he apologized to me. 3 days later he texts me asking how I am? Why would he reach back out even though I left him on read 3 days ago and didn’t reach out to him? Especially with a man with a lot of options?

This could be his tactic to keep you hooked to him. He is a man with a lot of options as per your disclosure. He might be talking to multiple women and this is why he is not very responsive to you. Do you want to compete with so many women for limited attention and crumbs thrown your way?

Make up your mind about him.

If you get the impression that he does not have much time for you (or want to take things foward with you) then cut him off, and move on. Continue to explore your options, and find a man who treats you right.

To give you some perspective: I have NOT promptly responded to every message that I have received from other people in different apps. I am busy and not very active on every social media platform (apps). But I am NOT dating women either (married). I would be responsive to women otherwise. I would be particularly responsive to a woman that I like very much and regard her as being worth my time. I was responsive to my wife before our marriage, and continue to be.

It is important to be realistic and understanding as well. If a man does not respond to you within 24 hours, ask him if he is alright. If he repeats this behavior several times then he is NOT much into you. Then you can decide about him.

 

[MattMatt]

Gee. "Giving someone space" is now a bad thing? Who knew?

 

[Laurentium]

Its very clear. Someone leaves me on read they won't be hearing from me again.

I don't even know what this phrase means. I feel old.

 

[*Deidre*]

So if left a guy on read for 3 days after he apologized to me. 3 days later he texts me asking how I am? Why would he reach back out even though I left him on read 3 days ago and didn’t reach out to him? Especially with a man with a lot of options?

Texting takes very little effort. You’re likely not the only one he’s texting. If he called you, or asked to meet up, that would show more effort. But a guy disappearing and coming back with random “hey, how are you” texts doesn’t mean much. The question is, why are you so consumed with a guy who treats you like you’re just another option?

 

[Livvie]

Texting takes very little effort. You’re likely not the only one he’s texting. If he called you, or asked to meet up, that would show more effort. But a guy disappearing and coming back with random “hey, how are you” texts doesn’t mean much. The question is, why are you so consumed with a guy who treats you like you’re just another option?

He apologized to her (she didn't say for what) and SHE is the one who didn't reply to him after he apologized. Then, HE reached out again.

He's the one making contact effort, not her.

 

[Openminded]

I don't even know what this phrase means. I feel old.

Not responding to someone’s text immediately is apparently a sin (according to my grandchildren). It’s ridiculous (IMO). But that’s their generation.

 

[Ragnar Ragnasson]

That's why I always say if you really want to reach me you better call. I'm not a slave to the phones chirps and beeps to check messages or emails.

 

[Laurentium]

Not responding to someone’s text immediately is apparently a sin

Doesn't that depend what the text says? If I text you "the house is on fire" and you read it, I'd expect a prompt response. If my message is "what a lovely day", an urgent response seems less necessary?

BUT, I suspect for the youngsters, texting takes the place of speech. So not replying is like I spoke to you and you just "blanked" me? To me, texting is not speech.

I've noticed this occasionally in couples. One of them is telling me "so I said to her....", and suddenly I catch on and ask, "did you actually say this to her, or is this texting?" and it turns out to be texting. I try telling them not to have important, emotional conversations via text, but they just think I'm crazy. "What, actually point our faces towards each other and make sounds? Forget it, grand-dad."

 

[Openminded]

BUT, I suspect for the youngsters, texting takes the place of speech. So not replying is like I spoke to you and you just "blanked" me? To me, texting is not speech.

Yes, that’s true.😄 They prefer text for everything and they expect a quick response (I get texts from my grandchildren with question marks if I haven’t replied as soon as they think I should — which is usually an hour).

 

[RebuildingMe]

Not responding to someone’s text immediately is apparently a sin (according to my grandchildren). It’s ridiculous (IMO). But that’s their generation.

It’s also the modern way of playing hard to get. Much like years ago when you got a phone number and you didn’t call for 3 days or whatever. It’s all playing games which the OP seems to be doing as well. You know, read the text but don’t let him know you’ve actually read it. Stupid game playing.

 

[Rob_1]

I don't know what's going on these days, but I think that for humans the level of stupidity has reached new levels.

It's amazing how someone can "fall in love" with someone that hasn't been met. It's all been through the internet.
Amazing, isn't it?

Amazing that they sent you a text, and are ready to kill you or commit suicide if you haven't answered by the next 10 seconds. What's wrong with these people?

 

[UpsideDownWorld11]

A plate he was spinning dropped and now he has an opening.

 

[*Deidre*]

He apologized to her (she didn't say for what) and SHE is the one who didn't reply to him after he apologized. Then, HE reached out again.

He's the one making contact effort, not her.

I believe she shared in another thread that this is the same guy who sounds like he’s playing games.

 

[Becky_dime]

Texting takes very little effort. You’re likely not the only one he’s texting. If he called you, or asked to meet up, that would show more effort. But a guy disappearing and coming back with random “hey, how are you” texts doesn’t mean much. The question is, why are you so consumed with a guy who treats you like you’re just another option?

He has asked me on two dates one of them was a day in advance in which I was busy the next day so I declined. Then he asked me out the next week on the same day only hours in advance in which I I was busy so I declined

 

[*Deidre*]

He has asked me on two dates one of them was a day in advance in which I was busy the next day so I declined. Then he asked me out the next week on the same day only hours in advance in which I I was busy so I declined

Is this the same guy that you mentioned seems to have a lot of “options?”

 

[Becky_dime]

Is this the same guy that you mentioned seems to have a lot of “options?”

Yes

 

[Becky_dime]

He ghosted me it’s been 5 days

 

[D0nnivain]

There's your answer. After 5 days, he's not interested. Take that as your closure. Write him off & move on.

 

[Layla96_Life]

Only he knows. Ask him.

honestly this is the best answer i've seen so far it's so simple but so efficient