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Do I tell him I might leave if things do not get better?

I have asked him to go to marriage counseling over some problems we have but he refuses. These issues resolve but then turn right back around in due time.

He has even gotten to the point that I have to ask him to shower. There has not been sex in a month. Mostly because his hygiene is declining and I have told him point blank that this is a major turn off. He will go 2-4 days without showering and not even realize it.

He snaps at me sometimes and denies yelling at me or giving me that death look. You all know what I mean. I see contempt in his eyes and it just makes me cry to see him look at me through that mindset.

Do I give him an ultimatum or is there a better way? Will telling him "I will leave by such and such a date if these things do not get resolved, but I want to work on...but I cannot take it as is anymore"....or could that just be the end to it right there?

I just do not know what to do but I feel as though I have so much more self worth that I cannot continue like this and I am just 30...I need to feel beautiful, free and have fun...like we used to 8 years ago. I love him, but he has changed as I am sure I have too...but I feel like he honestly and genuinely does not consider my feelings or integrity any longer. I really am taken for granted by him. I know everyone says that, but I honestly am.
 

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Do I tell him I might leave if things do not get better?

I have asked him to go to marriage counseling over some problems we have but he refuses. These issues resolve but then turn right back around in due time.

He has even gotten to the point that I have to ask him to shower. There has not been sex in a month. Mostly because his hygiene is declining and I have told him point blank that this is a major turn off. He will go 2-4 days without showering and not even realize it.

He snaps at me sometimes and denies yelling at me or giving me that death look. You all know what I mean. I see contempt in his eyes and it just makes me cry to see him look at me through that mindset.

Do I give him an ultimatum or is there a better way? Will telling him "I will leave by such and such a date if these things do not get resolved, but I want to work on...but I cannot take it as is anymore"....or could that just be the end to it right there?

I just do not know what to do but I feel as though I have so much more self worth that I cannot continue like this and I am just 30...I need to feel beautiful, free and have fun...like we used to 8 years ago. I love him, but he has changed as I am sure I have too...but I feel like he honestly and genuinely does not consider my feelings or integrity any longer. I really am taken for granted by him. I know everyone says that, but I honestly am.
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Yes, you should give him an ultimatum with a final date. If he doesn't change, he likely never will.
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