There's a new game in town! And everybody can play, WS's and BS's alike. It's called," badmouthing the AP" and seems like a lot of fun. There are a lot of interesting aspects to it and apparently can be very rewarding. Now I don't know much about the woman's side of it, where it's the H who's the cheater and the AP is an OW, but I've lived the men's portion and so will only talk about that. If you Betrayed Ladies have anything to add , feel free.
For the WW, by dissing your former lover, you are showing loyalty (belated) to your Hubby, and easing your guilt at the same time. A win-win situation, if I've ever seen it. Does anybody remember the old Flip Wilson skits? "The Devil made me do it!!" If the guilt and remorse gets too bad, you can always use it as a "get out of jail free", card. "Honey, it was that smooth-talking,_fill in the blanks_________ OM, who seduced me from you and gave me the attention I craved. . So lets badmouth him together and that will show I've learned my lesson, and am really the unspoiled, good wife I always was. And besides, the sex wasn't nearly as good as it is with you."
For the Bh, it's a chance to regain your manhood, and show what a tough guy you really are. " I would love to beat that SOB's ass, for showing me up, like he did." What I would like ALL of you BH's to remember is that whatever YOU think of the OM, and whatever your WW tells you about the OM, She (your ww) thought enough of him, to have sex with him ( or have an illicit relationship)for a prolonged period of time, so apparently he does possess at least some good qualities.
So lets all take the easy way out and play the "(Blame the OP game) so we can rug-sweep the real issues of our marriage and "let go", of our justifiable anger. I'm not excusing myself, in this. I played the game too, until I finally learned the most valuable lesson of all, the guy I have to answer to is the one that looks back at me when I shave.....all the rest is just .....game playing. See ya'll later.
For the WW, by dissing your former lover, you are showing loyalty (belated) to your Hubby, and easing your guilt at the same time. A win-win situation, if I've ever seen it. Does anybody remember the old Flip Wilson skits? "The Devil made me do it!!" If the guilt and remorse gets too bad, you can always use it as a "get out of jail free", card. "Honey, it was that smooth-talking,_fill in the blanks_________ OM, who seduced me from you and gave me the attention I craved. . So lets badmouth him together and that will show I've learned my lesson, and am really the unspoiled, good wife I always was. And besides, the sex wasn't nearly as good as it is with you."
For the Bh, it's a chance to regain your manhood, and show what a tough guy you really are. " I would love to beat that SOB's ass, for showing me up, like he did." What I would like ALL of you BH's to remember is that whatever YOU think of the OM, and whatever your WW tells you about the OM, She (your ww) thought enough of him, to have sex with him ( or have an illicit relationship)for a prolonged period of time, so apparently he does possess at least some good qualities.
So lets all take the easy way out and play the "(Blame the OP game) so we can rug-sweep the real issues of our marriage and "let go", of our justifiable anger. I'm not excusing myself, in this. I played the game too, until I finally learned the most valuable lesson of all, the guy I have to answer to is the one that looks back at me when I shave.....all the rest is just .....game playing. See ya'll later.