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My husband and I have only been married for 6 months, and things have completely fallen apart already. After we got married and moved in together, he became like a completely different person. He was depressed and angry and controlling and mean. I have been trying so hard to make things work and now it has finally gotten to the point where I am just so tired of trying, and I honestly feel like I am falling out of love with him. Now all of sudden he says he is wanting to change and everything, but I am having so many doubts because things have been so bad lately. Could our marriage work? I feel like if we are falling apart already, there is probably not much hope that we could make things work out in the long run. Any advice?
 

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How long did you date prior to marriage?

Ages?

Prior relationships? His and yours.

What has he done to show sincerity in wanting to change? How has he put the desire to change into action?

Is there a history of abuse in his family of origin? Substance abuse?

Is he willing to see a counselor/therapist individually and as a couple?
 

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the reality of being married frightens your hubby so much he's probably peeing in his pants.

and you're more freaked about it as well and you're probably over-reacting some.

take a deep breath, calm down, stop trying to make everything perfect.

i'm going to give your hubby the benefit of the doubt and say he's becoming controlling because he's modeling what he saw, in which case he's probably still trainable.

some good solid down to earth counseling right about now could get you both on track and moving forward committed to one another to grow a happy life together.

if your hubby refuses to go to counseling then go alone.

you either will go with him to get your marriage back on track or go alone to learn why you made a personally destructive choice by marrying hubby in the first place.

i wish you all happiness, and santa says hi for no particular reason:

:noel::noel::noel::noel::noel::noel::noel::noel:
 

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I am maried to my second husband, this is his first marriage. Our first year of marriage was hell! We'd lived together for a year and a half before getting married, and that was great. I didn't get it at first.

It was like he was seing me as the enemy, who took his freedom away. He resented just calling me and letting me know if he was going to be late, or hanging out with the guys. He had no problem doing this voluntarily before we were married, but now he felt like he HAD to. It bugged him.

After some long heart to heart talks, he realized that our marriage license was not the deed to his individuality and independance.

I don't know if this is what your hubby is going through. Some people really do change after marriage. Don't ask me why, Recent Cloud is probably right about mirroring what they saw.

Your marriage is very new, and if you think he is sincere, you should give him a chance. I'd hate for you to look back and have a bunch of "if onlys" nagging at you.
 
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