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4 Posts
I'm not even sure if this is the right place to put this but it looks like it.
*sigh* Where do I start...
I'm with a man that I do care about, that I love. A man that I am going to marry in November but there have been issues.
I really believe that he suffers from depression and most of it coming from his past. He has only told me so much about his past and a lot of it, he doesn't want to speak of to anyone. I can understand this, there are some things in my own past that are too painful to even think about. We accept this from each other and try to understand that there are days that we just have to sit down and try to collect ourselves.
But recently, it's been hard. We're currently in different countries, mainly because of work, but I am moving back to America soon. It's only four more months but this long distance thing is really messing with us. Mostly me, I suppose.
He has been depressed more and more lately. Stressed from work and from other things that he is thinking about but doesn't tell me. He started smoking something called Spice or Salvia. I looked it up and it's similar to Pot, which I don't really have any issues with except that it's illegal. Spice is legal though, so I'm not sure what is really bad about it. Only bad thing I've heard is that it can be mixed with some chemicals and can be really bad, messing up the brain and causing even more major depression.
I've told him about this and that I wish he would stop. That if he got something mixed, that it could really hurt him and he wouldn't really be able to tell if it was mixed or not. He went off to say that it was his choice whether or not he did this. Pretty much saying that I had no say in the matter.
On top of that, when he gets depressed, he doesn't talk to me. Recently, it will go four or five days before I even hear from him, and usually only for 30 minutes or so. I told him how it hurts that I don't get to talk to him and he just sits there. Doesn't say anything and even at times, will just smile while I'm pouring my heart out. It feels like he doesn't care at all.
I'm not sure what to do. I'm scared that IF (now I consider an if because of the fear) we get married, that he will continue this. I don't think I can do handle it. But now I'm stuck. I had purchased a ticket to visit him in november, that we would get married then, and it was a lot of money. I can't cancel the plane ticket either. I don't know what to do.
Am I making this into a big deal? Am I being overdramatic about this or am I justified?
*sigh* Where do I start...
I'm with a man that I do care about, that I love. A man that I am going to marry in November but there have been issues.
I really believe that he suffers from depression and most of it coming from his past. He has only told me so much about his past and a lot of it, he doesn't want to speak of to anyone. I can understand this, there are some things in my own past that are too painful to even think about. We accept this from each other and try to understand that there are days that we just have to sit down and try to collect ourselves.
But recently, it's been hard. We're currently in different countries, mainly because of work, but I am moving back to America soon. It's only four more months but this long distance thing is really messing with us. Mostly me, I suppose.
He has been depressed more and more lately. Stressed from work and from other things that he is thinking about but doesn't tell me. He started smoking something called Spice or Salvia. I looked it up and it's similar to Pot, which I don't really have any issues with except that it's illegal. Spice is legal though, so I'm not sure what is really bad about it. Only bad thing I've heard is that it can be mixed with some chemicals and can be really bad, messing up the brain and causing even more major depression.
I've told him about this and that I wish he would stop. That if he got something mixed, that it could really hurt him and he wouldn't really be able to tell if it was mixed or not. He went off to say that it was his choice whether or not he did this. Pretty much saying that I had no say in the matter.
On top of that, when he gets depressed, he doesn't talk to me. Recently, it will go four or five days before I even hear from him, and usually only for 30 minutes or so. I told him how it hurts that I don't get to talk to him and he just sits there. Doesn't say anything and even at times, will just smile while I'm pouring my heart out. It feels like he doesn't care at all.
I'm not sure what to do. I'm scared that IF (now I consider an if because of the fear) we get married, that he will continue this. I don't think I can do handle it. But now I'm stuck. I had purchased a ticket to visit him in november, that we would get married then, and it was a lot of money. I can't cancel the plane ticket either. I don't know what to do.
Am I making this into a big deal? Am I being overdramatic about this or am I justified?