I feel that I am growing obsessed with my wife.. We have been married for 8 years. We have been having problems for a year... She feels that I did not love her in our first few years of marriage... I worked a job that kept me stressed.. Even tho I had a high sex drive, when it got dark.. I was out like a light!! (still fall asleep when it gets dark)... So she felt rejected.. I am also guilty of not pulling my weight around the house... I'm no cleaner... When I came home, cleaning was not on my mind. She would clean house while holding a part time job. We had our first child and shortly after... I messed my leg up... was out of work and close to bed ridden for a few months... She fell right in there and took it like a champ... one year later he had our other child.. She would talk to me telling me my short commings.. I would write it off as nagging.. I knew I wasn't doing my part in cleaning... 2 years ago I begain to realize that the degree of cleaning she wanted was important to her.. I began trying to pull my share... She is OCD for a clean house.. she can't even get the house to her liking.... Don't get me wrong... it isn't just my cleaning the house but I was slacking on my chores... I have a one tracked mind... anyways.. last year she had a break down... She wrote me a letter... She said she felt trapped... she wanted out... I asked her if there was someone else... she says that she doesn't know... I asked if she had cheated... She said no but, there was a customer at work that she had been talking to.... That crushed me (I now feel that she just had her feelings all mixed up and there were no romantic feelings for this guy... but it changed me!)... I once had her on a pedestal and thought we were immune to our feelings drifting... I knew something was wrong for over 6 months... We had sex but it seemed to be just sex... I was not getting that emotional connection... The sex did not do enough for me.. I needed more... and yet I still felt empty... After the letter... I dropped all of my hobbies... I focussed on making cleaning my desire... We are fine on all areas that I know.. all but sex area... she doesn't desire sex anymore... She still jokes and cuts up about sex... and we talk about sex... sometime my drive is high... I understand feelings take time.. I'm fine with that... but she dont care if she desires more sex... she just says she will work on desiring sex... but you can't work on desiring sex if you dont care if you want it more... Now to the obsession... I have been obsessed with her for a couple years now... before last year I thought I was doing good on all of my short commings... I go to work and I think of things to be doing with her (not all romantic or sexual). now it is becomming more sexual... I try to deny myself sex with her or thinking about it... but when I'm with her doing what ever.. she turns me on... for the last month I probablly wanted sex everyday... I would make sure I did not ask more than twice per week... she knows that I am dening myself... but is killing me!!! It still feels like rejection... I want her to be happy more than me having sex but, I can't make myself forget about her with out trying to loose love for her... I dont want to loose love for her... Any ideas?