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Hi everyone, i have been married 7 years and known my husband 12 years, I thought we were happy and we lead a nice life!! In June we decided to buy a flat to rent out, we got the keys end july, my husband is a taxi driver and one of the taxi controllers, a 19 year old girl was moving in with her friend!!! all this i thought was fine and they moved in, did all
the decorating themselves and provided their own furniture! my husband was there a lot fixing things and buying stuff - she had a lot of personal issues and her mother had moved away!!! there was never a contract and as she had money issues he let her off paying a month in arrears! she looked after our dogs on numerous occasions in our house and i felt sorry for her!! This weekend just gone i asked if she wanted to come to ikea with us which she did and then dropping her off i asked what she had on for rest of day and she said nothing, sitting in alone! i felt sorry for her so invited her to dinner in my home and bought food stuff’ she came over and came out for a walk with dogs with me and then i cooked dinner! my husband came home from golf and we had dinner!! we were talking about tinder as she was on it and having a laugh and i had her phone, i noticed messages between my husband and her which knocked me for six!!! i kept quiet and tried to remain normal - we went and watched a film in living room and i desperately wanted to go and be sick but didn’t want to kick off so i decided to pretend to be asleep with eyes half open! she was cuddling up to him on the couch with me st the end!! i jumped up and said i was going to bed still trying not to kick off and went upstairs, my husband followed me and said i was rude going to bed when we had a guest downstairs!!! she stayed another hour before he walked her home ! i never slept a wink and lay in bed listening to him snore!! i got up next day and left early!!! he tried to ring me later as he was playing golf and dogs were alone in house! i didn’t answer! my kids who are all now in their twenties and my daughter in law came back to my house with me! my daughter in law is a counsellor/psychologist and when my husband came home my daughter in law asked to speak to him! he admitted everything to her and wanted to speak to me! he said it had only started since she moved into flat as he was round there a lot and that she was vulnerable and upset one day he was there so he gave her a cuddle which soon extended to a kiss, i told him it was basically sick, my husband is 60 and she 19! he apologised and said it was wrong and blamed me as i haven’t shown him love and affection for a while but there was hardly any emotion and it was like a business meeting!! he has said that he still loves me and wants to fix this but it is my decision and he will draw a line under it and move on if i say no!!’ I’m absolutely crushed and gutted and more so that she is only 19 and how can either of them think that was right and acceptable! that he **** his own doorstep, had little respect for me bringing her into my home and the lack of fighting for me and promising it a over and that he would tell her to leave !! he refused to show me his phone saying he didn’t want me to see it!’. i believe he loves me but staggered at the reaction to all this!’ i’ve upped and left and staying with my son!! i haven’t eaten or slept in two days and feel sick!!!
 

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She sees him as a sugar daddy. She’s living rent free and paying him in kind.
He’s convinced that she’s attracted to him and until this fog clears its pointless trying to reason with him.
I would advice you to see a lawyer and begin eviction proceedings, because she hasn’t paid any rent it should be straightforward.
And maybe begin divorce proceedings too.
 

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Good grief, he is old enough to be her grandfather.
As for blaming you, that's appalling, but its what cheaters do.
 

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Dump the bum, Lawyer up let him carry his own water. Welcome to TAM, nothing you did is an excuse for his cheating ways.
 
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