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We married 13 years now. I noticed some weird behaviour lately. She denies stuff and lies often. I am worried as to what is triggering this.
 

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Can you give us before and after examples of her changes? Has anything in particular changed in her clothing...makeup....secret use of the phone...gives us a little more
 

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We married 13 years now. I noticed some weird behaviour lately. She denies stuff and lies often. I am worried as to what is triggering this.
Is your gut telling you something?
I have heard it said over and over and over, trust your gut and so many cases on this board peoples gut ended up being right.
What type of lies are you catching her in?
 

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We married 13 years now. I noticed some weird behaviour lately. She denies stuff and lies often. I am worried as to what is triggering this.
Sorry that you find yourself here - you will receive advice from different people with different experiences - all valid but not necessarily always relevant to your personal situation. What you do is your choice - but remember that much of the advice comes from people who have learned the hard way - few get it right first time. - we'd like you to be one of that few.

You have noticed these changes recently - are you sure that the behavioural changes are recent rather than just your awareness of them?

Some people are naturally untruthful - it's how they are; some get a kick out of lying whilst others have no regard for veracity - what they say is what they think will get them what they want at that moment - and, if challenged, whatever they said becomes "true". Such people often become skilled at covering it up and you might not notice for many years - particularly since most of us are reluctant to believe anything bad about those we love.

If you are sure the changes are recent and you can't think of any reason why they have happened it is quite probable that they are being driven by a change in her extra-marital life. If so I recommend that you find out what is happening before confronting/accusing her - and any comment, however gentle, may be regarded as accusatory. If there is something going on that she wants to hide from you any discussion/accusation will simply drive it further underground and make finding out more difficult.

If you are able to do so - please trust this community with as much detail as you can - without identifying either yourself or your wife. Whatever your situation others will have been there and will offer advice based on their experiences. There are ways to find out what is going on (if anything) but not all apply to all circumsances.

Do you have children? Does she work? Have any of her close family had serious problems recently? Has her dress (including underwear), personal habits, 'phone use altered. Has your sex life varied - either more or less often/different behaviour. Is she spending more time out of the house than before - even if just visiting family? Showering more often?

Your gut is telling you something is "off". Our gut is usually - but not always - right. Don't prejudge what, if anything, is "off".

Are you keeping a record of her lies/denials? I suggest a complete record - dates, times details etc.. Put as much together as possible and then update as soon as possible after any further events. Memory is malleable - contemporaneous notes are much more reliable than those made days later. This will help you avoid later exaggeration and also provide a counter to any "gaslighting"* that you may later be subjected to.

We wish you well.

* After an old film called "Gaslight". It's when someone tries to convince another that they are mentally deranged - that things they remember did not happen etc. etc.
 

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You are going ot have to give us some more informaiton, about your marriage, her change in behavior. The more informaiton the more help we can be.
 
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