Ursula thanks for sharing your thoughts. I agree that its time I bring this topic up again with her. A lot of what you discussed with your BF....I brought up with her previously, and while she was defensive at first, she understood, and changed her ways for a little while. I do find it odd that she used to charge her phone in the kitchen before bed. But now she charges it next to her on her nightstand. It is odd that when she leaves the room, she usually (not all the time) brings it with her. Understood that these are signs of her hiding something from me. Call it naivety, blinding love, but, my gut feeling is that is not the case here.@Mach2_1981, you definitely aren't crazy, nor are you wrong to feel the way that you do. My former marriage was also like that; I competed with my XH's cell phone for his attention, and rarely did I win that battle. It was hurtful, frustrating and annoying. In my current relationship, my BF is pretty into Twitter, and I noticed a handful of times that he ignored me while scrolling. Here's what I did: I got his attention, told him the type of relationship that I'd come from, and said that it wasn't a very respectful way to treat the person that you care about, and that I felt hurt when he did that. I realize that it wasn't intentional in his case, or meant to be hurtful, but it got him to stop and listen when being spoken to.
I'd highly suggest doing the same thing with your wife. What she's doing isn't healthy for your marriage, and she needs to know that. Have you told her that you feel ignored, and that this is a dealbreaker? It sounds like it's time that she knows that. And just another thought: are podcasts really the only thing that she's doing on her cell? Does she seem to really protect her device when you're around?
I just don't get what she is looking for for on there. Is it an escape - does real life get to be too much.? Am I not exciting enough? I never got into social media so i just dont understand the draw. I do use my phone for news, sports, weather, but after awhile I need to put it down.