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Hello All,

I have a HUGE trust issue with everyone in the world so it's hard to love my wife like I want to. I live everyday scared that she's going to leave me and I'm going to miss the hell outta my family (consisting of her and my daughter). She hasn't done anything to make me feel this way, it's just I have this uncontrollable feeling of not trusting ANYONE. Does anyone else feel like this and if so can you please help? In my mind I want to give her all the love in the world and do romantic things and be great, but as soon as I start thinking about it, I clam up and I don't do it. This has been making me depressed lately because all I think about it my wife leaving me. Please reply and help me with this. Thank you.
 

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Hi Harry..

I can't say that I have ever felt like you do,, but, I know that at some point in life, probably everyone has trouble trusting, whether it is just in general, because they have been hurt, as we all have at some time or another, or whether it's because the person they are married to, has hurt them, and the trust was broken.

If as you say, your wife has given you no reason at all not to trust her, then you'll truly have to dig deep down, and try to find that trusting part of your soul.

This could quickly destroy your marriage, as your distrust of her is unwarrented, resentment, anger, and hurt, are just around the corner for her.

Have you tried talking to someone? I think seeing a counselor, or therapist, is truly the only way you are going to get past this. And, you might not ever be the type of person that trusts easily, but at the very least you could get to a point where you can live with this issue, and do your best to trust your wife.

Please don't hold off doing sweet and romantic things for her, this is a foundation for many many women, in a marriage. Most women love romance.. and to withold that from her, simply because you don't trust anyone, including her... is not going to get you anywere except alone.

I feel for you, this must be a paralyzing fear for you. I think talking to a therapist will be a great help.

keep us updated...
 

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If you have that serious of a trust issue, couseling might be the only way to help you.

Marina is right, this can and will destroy your marriage.

Did you have something happen to you in the past that caused you to not trust anyone? Someone cheat on you in a relationship?
 

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I know how you feel. I can't trust my girlfriend at all. I can't even let her hang with her friends anymore because I think they might touch her inappropriately or fall in love with her which she might respond to.

After browsing the internet I've found some advice. Adding them together I've come to this conclusion:
I'm going to let her hang with her friends so that she can tell me that nothing happens. I'll just have to take her word for it, because I love her and she loves me.

If you manage to get her trust otherwise, I'd be glad to know.
 

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I sorta know how you feel. My issue (took me months to finally talk about it here!)is that I feel that my W is upset with me and the way I handle stressful situations- even though she assures me that she is upset with the situation, NOT me, and I feel that it is a bit of a sticky wicket in our M. As hard as you try, you can never shake those feelings 110%.
 

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Though I must say, being on this site is great for advice, but some of the sections (the infidelity and divorce sections), you may want to steer clear of.:)
 
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