Talk About Marriage banner

61 - 70 of 70 Posts

·
Registered
Joined
·
31 Posts
Discussion Starter · #61 ·
Thankyou so much for your support. Writing on this pages helps alot. It helps with the loneliness because I know here people do understand what I'm going through. Everyone around me try's to help but sometimes they just say the wrong things thinking its making me feel better but it actually can at times make me feel worse.
Having a bad day today. Im missing him alot today. I wish I could just detach like he has, after all he was the one that did wrong by having an affair but I still want him when I should be hating him. When will I be happy again, I'm sick of being sad.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
2,435 Posts
Having a bad day today. Im missing him alot today. I wish I could just detach like he has, after all he was the one that did wrong by having an affair but I still want him when I should be hating him. When will I be happy again, I'm sick of being sad.
I'm sorry to hear that...I've been thinking about you!!!
Just remember when you feel your worst, to be sure you are taking care of YOU.

You WILL get better and feel better, it just takes baby steps every day, that's all.

Have you checked out the site I linked for you? I think you might find some great support on there too!!!
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
31 Posts
Discussion Starter · #63 ·
I'm sorry to hear that...I've been thinking about you!!!
Just remember when you feel your worst, to be sure you are taking care of YOU.

You WILL get better and feel better, it just takes baby steps every day, that's all.

Have you checked out the site I linked for you? I think you might find some great support on there too!!!
Im having an awful day today. I stupidly let my husband come to my house so I could help him out with something. I was being delusional that I would be strong and not be disappointed if he didn't tell me he missed me and tried to give me some affection.
He was very distant and when we were having a discussion about something he didn't like my answer so he stormed off and told me that he was not going to give me money to pay the bills anymore and he wanted sell the house after continuously telling me he would sign it over to me.
I panicked and chased after a him crying and showing him that he still had the power. All I wanted was for him to hug me and say sorry for all the pain he has caused me but instead he just looked at me with such hatred. I keep asking him what more could of had done to make him happy and make him want to stay.
Im trying so hard to be strong but I just don't have the strength. He doesn't comprehend or care how much he has hurt me. I honestly don't know how much more pain I can take. I want my old life back. I want to wake up happy and smile through out the day instead of feeling so empty inside. I am so broken I dont think I'm ever going to be fixed.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
10 Posts
Hi, Maree70. I read your story and I feel for you and trust me you can do it, you can make it. I am in your shoes now and every day I try and build up resources to handle it. You mentioned counseling and this would be for you to give you the freedom for you to speak your soul and receive positive suggestions I did that today, signed up for counseling for myself. Some people don't feel like doing that but it does help. I think you need a lawyer for what you said about the house and about the bill paying, have you contacted one yet? I hope you are doing well and please take a deep breath and try and find calm. I'm new to this board and this subject too myself since i am in the early stage of a divorce but if as little as I said helped i am glad. Be well. Doug
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
31 Posts
Discussion Starter · #65 ·
Hi, Maree70. I read your story and I feel for you and trust me you can do it, you can make it. I am in your shoes now and every day I try and build up resources to handle it. You mentioned counseling and this would be for you to give you the freedom for you to speak your soul and receive positive suggestions I did that today, signed up for counseling for myself. Some people don't feel like doing that but it does help. I think you need a lawyer for what you said about the house and about the bill paying, have you contacted one yet? I hope you are doing well and please take a deep breath and try and find calm. I'm new to this board and this subject too myself since i am in the early stage of a divorce but if as little as I said helped i am glad. Be well. Doug
Hi Doug thanks for your comments. I have been to 2 counselling sessions with a psychologist. It helps when I'm there but as you would know that when your on your own its hard because all I think of is the situation.
I hope you are going OK with your divorce. Talking to people that are or have experienced divorce or seperation helps me a lot.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
10 Posts
hi, another thing i have found in my area are divorce support groups , do you have those in your area too? sadly they are probably not free but costs can vary i suppose.
I hope you are doing well now and please do take care of yourself.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
31 Posts
Discussion Starter · #67 ·
hi, another thing i have found in my area are divorce support groups , do you have those in your area too? sadly they are probably not free but costs can vary i suppose.
I hope you are doing well now and please do take care of yourself.
I have found it hard to find any support groups around me. Unfortunately all the people I seem to connect with live overseas. I would love to just go somewhere and be able to talk with other people going through the same thing, this is why I find this pages so helpful. The loneliness is my hardest thing. Im use to doing everything with my ex and now even though I have 4 beautiful children I still feel there is a void that they will never be able to fill. I dont have a big friend network because my husband only ever wanted it to be him and I.
I want to find a new life but I just don't know where to start.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
10 Posts
Well you started here and after all the replies from people who want to help you including me you can call us all your friends . I know it’s not the same as in person but we are all here to help you. Do you have a lot of outdoor activity near you such as water rafting , kayaking , hiking and bike trails ? These could allow you to meet other people nearby and some of these may be clubs you can join ?? Any personal hobbies you have always enjoyed like painting ? Some clubs allow you to experience making art , maybe painting . You sound nice snd I net you would not have a lot of trouble making friends in these clubs. Some colleges also have these non credit courses for adults who want to broaden their skills and passions, any community colleges near you ?? I hope some of these spark a interest snd you can maybe find a new path to enjoy one of them ??? Hope those helps . Be well. Doug
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
31 Posts
Discussion Starter · #69 ·
I have found it hard to find any support groups around me. Unfortunately all the people I seem to connect with live overseas. I would love to just go somewhere and be able to talk with other people going through the same thing, this is why I find this pages so helpful. The loneliness is my hardest thing. Im use to doing everything with my ex and now even though I have 4 beautiful children I still feel there is a void that they will never be able to fill. I dont have a big friend network because my husband only ever wanted it to be him and I.
I want to find a new life but I just don't know where to start.
Chatting to you really helps, so thankyou your time.
I have found it hard to find any support groups around me. Unfortunately all the people I seem to connect with live overseas. I would love to just go somewhere and be able to talk with other people going through the same thing, this is why I find this pages so helpful. The loneliness is my hardest thing. Im use to doing everything with my ex and now even though I have 4 beautiful children I still feel there is a void that they will never be able to fill. I dont have a big friend network because my husband only ever wanted it to be him and I.
I want to find a new life but I just don't know where to start.
Well you started here and after all the replies from people who want to help you including me you can call us all your friends . I know it’s not the same as in person but we are all here to help you. Do you have a lot of outdoor activity near you such as water rafting , kayaking , hiking and bike trails ? These could allow you to meet other people nearby and some of these may be clubs you can join ?? Any personal hobbies you have always enjoyed like painting ? Some clubs allow you to experience making art , maybe painting . You sound nice snd I net you would not have a lot of trouble making friends in these clubs. Some colleges also have these non credit courses for adults who want to broaden their skills and passions, any community colleges near you ?? I hope some of these spark a interest snd you can maybe find a new path to enjoy one of them ??? Hope those helps . Be well. Doug
Funny I find the people on this pages more of a friend than people I've known for years.
I joined a gym 3 weeks ago but haven't been back. Im not a confident person and it makes me hold back alot. I know ineed to be a big girl and just go join groups but at the moment my anxiety holds me back. I've lived for my ex and my kids for so long I don't know how to be me anymore.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
2,435 Posts
@Maree70, I've been thinking of you and hoping you are hanging in there...

Remember, sometimes it's going to feel like you are taking one baby step forward, and then two giant steps backwards...that's just the process of grief and loss, and forging a new path for you to walk on.

DON'T BE DISCOURAGED (as much as possible)!!!! You WILL get through this, just keep taking care of YOU, just as you would a friend who was struggling -- be that friend TO YOURSELF!!!!!
 
61 - 70 of 70 Posts
Top