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BEEP BEEP Look out! The karma bus is rolling into town!

7.9K views 46 replies 21 participants last post by  AppleDucklings  
#1 ·
So, I get home from work, check my mail and I have a letter from the state child support enforcement agency. I have not received any child support from my ex husband since the divorce was finalized on June 6. This has made him $1,500 in arrears. I got a letter stating they were going after him for the past due amount and I will be receiving an additional $150.00 a month for past due on top of the regular support payments. With the child support he pays to me, the child support he pays for his oldest daughter to a different mother, with the medical insurance he pays for the kids (and that is court ordered as well) now with the additional amount he has to pay, that pretty much eats up his entire pay check. He wont have any money left. Oh boo :( How sad. BWAHAHA HA HA HA HA HA HA EAT IT ASSHAT!
He's going to be working 50plus hours a week and bringing home literally $0. Why? Because his car payment is also automatically deducted from his pay too. Once all these garnishments are taken out, he is left with literally zero. Gee, I hope new poorass GF makes enough money to support him. He's gonna need it. He has no family who will help him out money-wise. Oh, I only wish I could see the look on his face when he sees that extra money taken from his check.
I'm feeling a bit vindicated right now :D
 
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#2 ·
Although I don't believe in karma, because it implies that you deserved to be cheated on, I do believe in getting justice done. Did he think he was just going to ride off into the sunset with OW and have a good life while destroying his family with no repercussions? Time to pay the piper!
 
#3 ·
Karma is both good and bad though. In this case, Apples ex got bad karma and she today got good karma. See how it works? Pretty cool stuff.

Apples, greasy fat fry chick got herself a real prize. Oh, I coined a new phrase earlier today over something totally unrelated but I figured you would appreciate it, since you tend to like my word combinations. I'll PM you with the word as I am not sure it can be posted here.
 
#4 ·
Hmmmm....glad to hear justice will be served. That sounds like my estranged husband. He's behind with child/spousal support by more than $11K. I will be sending the affidavit to the judge this next week. He will then get to begin his stay in an entirely new gated community--the county jail. I'm wondering what his little tart will do then. It's really going to cut her budget. Priceless!:D
 
#7 ·
:smthumbup: As much as I would wallow in the joys of seeing my ex hauled off to jail, it would not be good as if he's in jail, he can't work and if he doesn't work, then I get no child support.
I hope justice is served for you. $11K is a lot.
 
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#5 ·
There is no way he can stay afloat financially on his own. For one, his credit is so bad, nobody will loan him money, for two, he comes from a poor family. They have no money to help out with (nor do they want to help him. He lied to all them as well and they have pushed him away. I'm closer to his family than he is.) The new GF that he is living with now is only 22 with a child of her own. I cant imagine she makes that much money. Although I would bet that she is probably on state aid and he simply mooches off of her.
 
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#10 ·
I understand the pain and hurt going through all you been through.But if I may ask a serious question with out sounding like an a$$.

would it not be better to get something rather than nothing.I mean if he can't suport himself he will lose his job and then you might get even less in the end.

if he loses his job now in this recession he might not find one for a long time. espically since more and more emplorers are doing extensive background checks (he won't look to good to most emplorers)


or he might start working under the table and then theres no way to know what hes earning.


I don't know the law so maybe driving him down into poverty(wich he most certinaly deserves) is how you get the most finacialy out of him.

But it sounds counter productive I would think you have to let him have enough to be a cash cow for a few years rather than him becomming so poverty stricken that you loss out.
 
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#11 ·
My mom and stepmom finally caught up to my father when us kids were grown. We hadn't seen him in over 15 years and he hadn't paid a dime in that time either.

He owed over 50,000 in back child support :) He couldn't register his car or renew his license until it was paid off.

Serves him right. My mom worked 2 jobs to support me because his stupid ass wouldn't pay.

A check came for me for a little over 20,000 (I was 22). The rest went to my sisters and their mom. I signed over the check to my mother. Seemed like the right thing to do.
 
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#19 ·
A check came for me for a little over 20,000 (I was 22). The rest went to my sisters and their mom. I signed over the check to my mother. Seemed like the right thing to do.
I teared up! She clearly raised you right!

I am a little shocked that the money didn't go directly to her, though. She clearly used her own funds to care for her children. Shouldn't late CS be viewed as repayment? I'm curious to know if it always works this way.
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#13 ·
Chilly your argument has been the basis for the lagging child support collection policies of the past. Women have fought hard to get child support agreements inforced. Things have improved marginally for children of divorce. Many states and the feds are confiscating tax refunds, and garneshing pay and using many aggressive methods of getting childen the support they should have from both of their working parents.

I have no sympathy for Apples husband. He got himself into a fnancial hole by failing to make suitable adjustments to his lifestyle to take care of his responsibilities. That is what Apples and her kids must do so why is he exempt. If he does not pay for the children he made then we, the people must.

I think it is a good thing that he is financially hamstrung, that will naturally drop kick him out of the baby making arena. He is not morally, financially or psychologically suitable for fathering any more children. From an evolutionary standpoint, he is a sub par sperm donor and father figure.

From a societal standpoint, any further issue from him would be a drain on our society. He will feel like a stud making babies until he is 90 so financial neutering is a good way of preventing an unsuitable man from indiscriminant seed spreading. If he is poverty stricken for having to support kids think of all of the woman who are the same because the father of their kids will not pay.

Apple don't let up and don't feel sorry for him. You and your kids are making sacrifices and he will join you in your struggles that will be good for him. Maybe he will realize that the world does not revolve around him.
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#16 ·
He has had a vasectomy so he won't be making any more children, which is good for everyone all around. This really does screw him very hard financially but he was the one who chose to cheat. Far as I'm concerned, he knew I would divorce him if he cheated again, and he still cheated again. He knew the consequences. Now he shall live with them. And I dont care if he ends up sleeping in his car.
 
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#22 · (Edited)
touchy subject for me.
My ex cheated and destroyed the family, obviously not worried about the best interests of the family or child.
Barring months if not years of expensive litigation, she got primary custody.
I now pay her child support, as well as lose the time with my child.
I was given the " because its just the way it is" as reason behind why she was automatically assumed a better parent, and being that infidelity means nothing to a court, I was left with the option of having to prove she was incompetent through a long expensive court battle resulting in judgment being rendered by someone completely ignorant of the situation or family history, therefore relying on an outdated Standard Order completely favoring the mother,,, or accept my future role as Part Time Dad. Suddenly find yourself having to prove you are the better parent, involved Dad, versus someone automatically assumed as primary because thats "Just the way it is.."

Theres no excuse for not paying your child support, but Catherine's statement about how "Women have fought for years..." clearly exemplifies how ingrained this social assumption is. It became a case of me being assumed guilty and having to prove my innocence, because I was a man, and becuase she was a mother.
 
#23 · (Edited)
When my brother walked in on his wife banging some scumbag and divorced her, she was ordered to pay 50 bucks a month for child support!!, not a dime was EVER paid to him.

take a wild guess how I wasnt able to afford the long litigation process to fight a "maybe" war with my ex in court over custody?? spending the last ten years of my life putting every dime I had into caring for the household and paying for emergencies, and taking care of immediate needs to the point of buying groceries on a credit card for over a year, while she all the time just "didnt have the money" to help out.
She makes 30% more than I do every year by the way, its just a matter of how she parties with every nickel she gets. I guess I ended up being the controlling asshat hoping we wouldnt retire as greeters at Walmart.
 
#24 ·
Shoo, you have a very valid point and you are right. In cases like yours, where you were faithful and she wasn't, it's not fair. I've always been in favor of some sort of firm legal consequence for a cheating spouse, and the affair partner(s) because of the emotional damages it causes a person. It's not right that your wife got to cheat and you got the crap end of the stick. Not fair at all. I fully support a father's right to his child. I even believe that the father should have a say so in the unborn's life. But, for me, he was the one who cheated, and he is getting what he deserves.
 
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#28 ·
:iagree: There need to be consequences for cheating! Many times there is collateral damage caused by the cheating. Some of those damages don't have a price tag but others do. I really hate to see it when a good person is victimized by a cheating spouse and the legal system.
 
#27 ·
And to just clear it up, I don't like my mother all that much LOL Honestly...she is a shrewd woman.

HOWEVER--- She was bringing home 1800 a month, raising me, had a 1340 mortgage, a car payment, my teen years, I never wanted anything (even though we lived frugally, I was always happy). She worked two jobs to get that 1800 a month and I still marvel at how she raised me on 500 a month (that's for all bills and food).

She taught me how to budget, and for that I am thankful.
 
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#29 ·
yea, I never understood how people can cheat and still get alimony, etc.

My uncle's wife cheated on him. She got the house in the divorce but my uncle was still paying for it. Her boyfriend moved in. Her boyfriend also drove the car my uncle was still paying for.

I can see how some people could kill because of this. It's enough to make anyone go mad.
 
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#30 ·
You get to the point where you'd rather have none of your stuff than any of her. Kind of like where people trash their house right before eviction.

Sure, you want money? Do sacks of loose quarters work for you?
 
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#31 ·
Yup. I still live in the same house but I have changed it to get rid of "him" as much as I possibly could.
 
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#37 ·
My cousins wife had multiple affairs while they were married. They have 2 children.. She cheated on my cousin many times and she gets alimony. They split in may, as soon as he left she had her other man move in...OH and she is pregnant with the om's baby...

I hope that karma bus will hit her right in her fat arse.
 
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#38 ·
This is like Shoo said. Faithful men get shat on. It's so unfair. Again, this is why I believe those who have committed adultery should face legal recourse. Marriage, after all, is a legal binding contract and they broke that contract. And it is even more shatty when you have good men like Shoo and your cousin here, who wanted to do right for their family and instead they lost it all. How crappy is that?
I hope the karma bus smacks them hard as well. I'd give just about anything to have a faithful man in my life. I hate when women like that can't see what a good thing they had.
 
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#45 ·
Jelly, I bumped up my thread "So mad" with something the ex did last night. I think I handled the situation very well but I always like your comments if you can find it and read it. :D
 
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#47 ·
Thanks for reading Ten :) I value your opinion too, and I know you like my use of "fun words" LOL
 
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