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Discussion Starter · #1 · (Edited)
Hi all

I have posted her a few months back regarding my husband and I are in counseling due to sexual issues on his end. He started by saying he lost attraction to me, now he says he only feels urges at times.

Background is we have been together 3 and half years, married 2 and 1/2 years, but he says he felt attraction dwindling once I was pregnant, and never has been strong since. When we were first together, 6 months, the sex was great and attraction was strong. In fact he would comment that i was his best sexual partner. Here is the kicker he was married 10 years ago and divorced after 1 and half years due to lost attraction as well. Since in counseling we have fixed some communication issues and improved our relationship and counselor has diagnoised him with an Avoident Attachment issue due to dysfunctional upbringing with alcoholic dad. So issue is communication of feelings is hard for him and it is easier to avoid sex than be initimate.

He tells the counselor he loves me deeply and had enjoys our relationship. He wants the sexually side to come back with regular frequency, we would both like 2 times a week, but has not fully "gotten of the bench" to do it. It has been 6 months since we have last had sex and have been in counseling. He has been flirting and grabbing me for a few weeks but not taken the plunge per se.

Any one have any spouse who has issues with feelings and intimacy due to background? If so can it get better?

We have a 2 and half year old and I really don't want to divorce. But I am 37 and in good shape, have great job and a lot going for me and really want a stable sexually relationship as part of marriage. Counselor says he is making progress, but I am still concerned.

Any tips?

Thanks for listening!
 
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