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754 Posts
My story in brief: my H left or a work trip and hasn't come back. It's been five weeks. He won't talk to me but will text re finances. He's in touch with his sister and she thinks he's having a breakdown. He had worked almost every day for the past few years. Money is tight, he's self employed and it's been very hard.
Anyway we've not been having a lot of sex the past year, and I've blamed myself for that. I guess I've turned into LD, and i do get very tired in the evenings. Im so quick to take the blame, since he left I've fallen back into blaming myself for everythng.
Something I read on here today made me rethink that.he is a good listener and supportive of me but he doesn't share feelings very much and admitted his childhood affected him where he can't talk about things like that. He does share some things but alot goes unsaid. I can tell when he's unhappy or thinking about something but he wont tell me. It's like I've just realised maybe it's not all my fault.
Since he left I've been working on myself, I'm back in IC, I'm trying to get out more and meet new people. (I was too reliant on my H) I have given long thought to what part I played in this. I do think I have a tendency to see everything I did wrong and perhaps not the whole picture.
We've always been close and had fun together, and always loved each other. Been married 12 years, very loving and kind o each other but the passion has faded somewhat.
As he won't talk to me, I've sent se few emails outlining what I think went wrong. Last email was a bit pleading. I know, I've to stop doing that.
Any suggestions, thoughts, advice?
Anyway we've not been having a lot of sex the past year, and I've blamed myself for that. I guess I've turned into LD, and i do get very tired in the evenings. Im so quick to take the blame, since he left I've fallen back into blaming myself for everythng.
Something I read on here today made me rethink that.he is a good listener and supportive of me but he doesn't share feelings very much and admitted his childhood affected him where he can't talk about things like that. He does share some things but alot goes unsaid. I can tell when he's unhappy or thinking about something but he wont tell me. It's like I've just realised maybe it's not all my fault.
Since he left I've been working on myself, I'm back in IC, I'm trying to get out more and meet new people. (I was too reliant on my H) I have given long thought to what part I played in this. I do think I have a tendency to see everything I did wrong and perhaps not the whole picture.
We've always been close and had fun together, and always loved each other. Been married 12 years, very loving and kind o each other but the passion has faded somewhat.
As he won't talk to me, I've sent se few emails outlining what I think went wrong. Last email was a bit pleading. I know, I've to stop doing that.
Any suggestions, thoughts, advice?