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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
First: I can't believe I am posting anything like this for all to see but I figure someone has to be in a similar situation.

Here it goes.

About me: I am 39 years old live in Dallas and I have been married to my wife for 14 years. She is 32 years old and we have a beautiful daughter who is 3. We live in a nice neighborhood, I have a boat, a mustang, a truck, minivan and plenty of other Remote Control Toys etc. I am self employed and run two businesses. But at the same time I am drowning in Debt but that is another matter.

The story: I met my wife believe it or not on Yahoo Chat back when it was around 16 years ago. We met at Starbucks and then went back to her place. We got into the spa and it was time to make my move. She told me NO. I had slept with every girl I had gone on a date with except her. I knew she was a keeper and I couldn't let this one go. So 14 years later here I am married with a 3 year old. But sometimes I think what did I do.

The current situation is this. I just don't feel like hanging out with my wife at all. I don't want to sit next to her, I don't want to have sex with her, (we are supposed to be trying for another child) I don't want to go anywhere with her, (would rather ask a friend or take my daughter) and sometimes don't even want to be bothered by her. But this comes and goes. I am bi-polar and add and I am sure this has something to do with it. So I might feel this way for a while and then not later. She asked me today where we are in our marriage and I just wanted to blurt out all this stuff to get it off my chest but what if I don't feel that way in a month. Then I will have hurt her and said some things I could never take back. Now you are probably wondering what I would say. HA well that depends on the moment. But as of this morning this is what I would have said. I am just going to put it all out there.

You really want to know: Sometimes you drive me crazy. I ask you not to leave dirty hygiene products laying around or put a lid on the trash if you do and you don't do it. You know I am ocd about that stuff and it grosses me out. How many times do I have to tell you this and then you want to come in here and ask if we can have sex cause it's ovulation time, like really. You are so lazy around the houses and it drives me crazy. You said you were going to put all these clothes out for a garage sale. You dumped all the bags out of the attic and let them just sit underneath the stairs of the attic for 2 weeks. Why did you even go up there. I couldn't even get my car in the garage and your just sitting on the couch doing nothing when that needs to be taken care of and I had already asked you to do it 2 times. Your family is so disrespectful and you know I can't stand them. Yet when you ask that we go out and do something you always ask if your sister or dad can come. I just take myself out of going all together because obviously you can't seem to get it through your head after 14 years that I can't stand your family. Your dad is down right rude to me and your sister thinks she owns everything at our house and just takes it and then she just goes off on me about something that is none of her business in the first place but you told her. The girl is 29 years old, a pot head, on pills and X, lives at home but is *****ing to me about my life with you. So she is not allowed over yet you still say well she could watch our child for a while. Like what is wrong with you. Did you not here me tell you I don't like your sister or your dad and I don't want them over.

My wife: She is really one of the greatest people you will ever meet when it comes to be being there for you and this is not a joke. She works at a preschool with kids. She just loves kids. She was a school teacher for a while as well. She will get up on a moments notice to go help someone who don't even deserve it. She extends a hand to people in need all the time. Even to me when I know I don't deserve it and makes me feel like **** that I am not the same way to her. But I don't want to fake it.

On the Real though: This is what I think. I have never told her this. My wife has no friends. She does not know how to get friends or keep them. So to me that affects my marriage. If you can't get and keep friends how do you expect to keep a marriage running. I have not attraction to you as a friend. To me you are boring. Just taking you out with other married couples they don't seem to call us back or my friends say hey is your wife coming cause she drives them crazy. Laughs loud, talks loud, constantly apologizing. Does not smoke weed, little drinking, gluten free but she has to be but still. It's like a rainy cloud following me around all the time.

I know what you are thinking. If you don't like her then leave her. So why don't I?
* I can not be alone. I have separation anxiety or something
* I love her but I am not in love with her
* What message would this send to my daughter
* I might leave her and regret it and there is no coming back from that
* The minute I decided to leave her I would want her back
* I could never stand to see her with another man knowing I lost her or tossed her aside
* She truly cares for me and I would never want to hurt her like that.

There are 2 sides to every story and I can just give you her side of the story and then we will get to why I am posting this message.

She says I don't do anything with her and that is true. I can't sit through a movie I am super bored. I don't want to go to your family's house for 2 days and spend the night. I want to go for 4 or 5 hours tops and lets go home. I don't want to take care of our child when she is sick. (I can't though cause I work) I am in debt, I owe her almost $10k that she let me borrow earlier this year. I went on 2 vacations this year without her because she couldn't get off work. I could go on and on

The Question: My wife asked me this morning where do we stand with our marriage? It has been asked of me several times. To me we are best friends living under the same roof and we have a kid. We come home to each other and talk about our days and sometimes we have sex. That's it.

1. So should I answer this questions or put it off? It does always seem to get better so why not just delay saying anything.
2. Do I be honest when it could truly end my marriage or hurt one or both of us?
3. Do I need to just take a break from marriage all together and see how I feel?
 

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re: Am I a piece of ****

My wife: She is really one of the greatest people you will ever meet when it comes to be being there for you and this is not a joke. She works at a preschool with kids. She just loves kids. She was a school teacher for a while as well. She will get up on a moments notice to go help someone who don't even deserve it. She extends a hand to people in need all the time. Even to me when I know I don't deserve it and makes me feel like **** that I am not the same way to her. But I don't want to fake it.
Then

My wife has no friends. She does not know how to get friends or keep them. So to me that affects my marriage. If you can't get and keep friends how do you expect to keep a marriage running
But before you wrote this

Sometimes you drive me crazy. I ask you not to leave dirty hygiene products laying around or put a lid on the trash if you do and you don't do it. You know I am ocd about that stuff and it grosses me out. How many times do I have to tell you this and then you want to come in here and ask if we can have sex cause it's ovulation time, like really. You are so lazy around the houses and it drives me crazy.
You contradict yourself in the very next paragraph so either you don't know what you're writing about or the problem isn't her but you.

So which one is it, a crazy person who leaves dirty hygiene products around the house but is the greatest person who helps people at the drop of a hat and love kids but has no friends and can't keep friends?

Your story structure is slightly muddled.
 

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re: Am I a piece of ****

As for my long answer-

Stop going on vacations when you're in debt. Why did you need to take 2 vacations without your wife in the first place?

Stop hanging out with couples who think you're wife isn't cool cause she doesn't smoke pot or drink

Stop acting like a child because a woman has pads in the trash can

You spend no time with her, don't watch your own child when she is sick

You're not mature enough for a relationship. You need to grow up before you can be with anyone but having bi-polar and ADD will make things difficult. Go on meds, stay in therapy and let your wife find someone more suitable
 

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re: Am I a piece of ****

I can see your side of this. Your wife is not taking your concerns seriously as she should.

For example her not taking care of the hygiene products is unacceptable. Your request is more than reasonable.

One of the reasons that you are falling out of love with her is that the two of you are not spending quality time together. Spending time with her family is NOT quality time. The two of you need to spend time together, just the two of you.

There are two books that I think would really help you. "Love Busters" and "His Needs, Her Needs" (see links in my signature block below). Read them in that order.

The books will give you a good idea of what is reasonable for you ask and talk about.

For example her refusal to put dirty hygine products in the trash and to put the lid on is a "love buster". Things like that are called "love busters" because they bust your love, or lead to you falling out of love. And I'll bet she can list some things that you do that are love busters for her.

You two do not know how to talk about your "love busters", your needs and negotiate. Hopefully the books will teach you that.

I suggest that you read the books first so that you learn a new way of talking about all this stuff. Then you sit her down and tell her that you love her but you think that your marriage is in trouble and you want her to work on it with you. Then ask her to read the books and read through them with you.

I don't think you are a piece of ****. I think you have very reasonable concerns and your wife is not showing you much respect in relation to your concerns.

{by the way, don't use cutesy spellings for curse words here on TAM. Instead just spell them out. Our provanity filter will filter them out with "****"}
 

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Discussion Starter · #7 ·
re: Am I a piece of ****

My wife is a great person. She puts everyone first. This is true. But that does not equal a best friend or a great wife. My wife didn't have any friends when I met her. She was a dork in High School but I didn't go to her high school. I was just the opposite. People she thinks are her friends only call her when they need something. There sick, need a ride to work. Other than that they don't call to go and do anything. I know why they don't. It is hard to connect with my wife. Some people just have those people skills and some people don't.

I do think some of the problem is with me. I won't deny that. OCD, ADD a little bi-polar sometimes but I also feel that my wife could do some simpler things like putting that stuff away cause I don't like it. How hard is that. I mean 14 years now and you still do it. One time our dogs got into. The house smelled so bad and I almost threw up. I was pissed. This never would have happened in the first place. I had been saying all along. But I don't say anything anymore cause what good does that do.
 

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Discussion Starter · #8 ·
re: Am I a piece of ****

As for my long answer-

Stop going on vacations when you're in debt. Why did you need to take 2 vacations without your wife in the first place?

Stop hanging out with couples who think you're wife isn't cool cause she doesn't smoke pot or drink

Stop acting like a child because a woman has pads in the trash can

You spend no time with her, don't watch your own child when she is sick

You're not mature enough for a relationship. You need to grow up before you can be with anyone but having bi-polar and ADD will make things difficult. Go on meds, stay in therapy and let your wife find someone more suitable
I was no in debt when I went on Vacation 2 times at the beginning of the year. I am self employed and we had a major setback about 4 months ago that put me in debt. I took my mom and daughter on the first vacation and my cousin on the second one. I can't help it if she can't get off work. I am not supposed to go do anything because she has to work?

Stop hanging out with couples that don't like my wife: Well this started in church first. People would invite us over and I would connect great with the husband but my wife could never connect with the wife or wives. Then she joined some mother groups and that didn't work out. She has tried a lot of things and just can not connect with people on that level. I think she either tries to hard or comes off as a dork I don't know. As for the drinking and smoking I was only saying that she is a goody goody. She has gotten much better with this though over the past few years and at least will drink and have a good time but that is not always a good thing either.

I personally don't think I am acting like a child and asking you to put up your pads. What if I wiped my ass everyday and put it in the trash instead of the toilet. Would you look in the trash and say I love my husband he is so cute. I know it is normal for women but I also know that for myself I can't stand it and just want you to put at least a lid on it. So when I am in the small water closet I don't feel like I am breathing in vagina. I mean because it does smell whether you know it or not. Our bathroom is huge but the water closet is so small and it stinks.

I don't spend time with her because she boring to me and always bringing her family along. Her family is very toxic. There so toxic I can't even put it on here.

I never wanted kids. Took me 8 years till I decided to just give in because it was not fair for me to hold out on her when she loves kids so much. My daughter is the best thing that happened to me. I watch her when she sick if I can but I run 2 business. I can't just call in sick to work. I have asked her to find someone that she can call if our daughter is sick but she never does it. Instead just gets upset when I can't get off work or her dad has to watch her.
 

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Discussion Starter · #9 ·
re: Am I a piece of ****

I can see your side of this. Your wife is not taking your concerns seriously as she should.

For example her not taking care of the hygiene products is unacceptable. Your request is more than reasonable.

One of the reasons that you are falling out of love with her is that the two of you are not spending quality time together. Spending time with her family is NOT quality time. The two of you need to spend time together, just the two of you.

There are two books that I think would really help you. "Love Busters" and "His Needs, Her Needs" (see links in my signature block below). Read them in that order.

The books will give you a good idea of what is reasonable for you ask and talk about.

For example her refusal to put dirty hygine products in the trash and to put the lid on is a "love buster". Things like that are called "love busters" because they bust your love, or lead to you falling out of love. And I'll bet she can list some things that you do that are love busters for her.

You two do not know how to talk about your "love busters", your needs and negotiate. Hopefully the books will teach you that.

I suggest that you read the books first so that you learn a new way of talking about all this stuff. Then you sit her down and tell her that you love her but you think that your marriage is in trouble and you want her to work on it with you. Then ask her to read the books and read through them with you.

I don't think you are a piece of ****. I think you have very reasonable concerns and your wife is not showing you much respect in relation to your concerns.

{by the way, don't use cutesy spellings for curse words here on TAM. Instead just spell them out. Our provanity filter will filter them out with "****"}
Our marriage counselor actually mentioned the book his needs her needs. It has been about 5 years and I can't remember if we read them or not. Oh she would would have a ton of love busters I don't do for her. I could probably list them all. Shoot now that you said it I am going to try and think of what they are. I didn't know about the spelling thing. I will just spell it out now. Thanks for the info.
 

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re: Am I a piece of ****

We live in a nice neighborhood, I have a boat, a mustang, a truck, minivan ...
LOL. A minivan? You must be quite the chick magnet out on the open road. Maybe you can find someone with a Members Only jacket who'll take it off your hands for you for a couple hundred bucks to help toward paying down your debt.

3. Do I need to just take a break from marriage all together and see how I feel?
I think you need to take a break from humanity.

She was a dork in High School but I didn't go to her high school.
I guess you'd know what she was like as a Sophomore in high school - since you were sniffing around her as a 23 year old adult.

I do think some of the problem is with me.
How magnanimous of you to admit that maybe it's 'partly' your fault.

80/20 on this one, leaning towards "it must be school holidays again. Today 05:07 PM
Me too. But the comment about having a lame minivan dragged me in, dammit.
 
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re: Am I a piece of ****

You said in your other thread that you prefer to think women don't "do" stuff like have periods and poop.

What are you doing for your OCD and other issues? The ADD and bi-polar?

You are immature and you need to be dealing with your mental health issues with your dr.

You should plan vacations when your wife can go, not with your cousin.

You don't go on $10,000 worth of vacation if you don't have enough of an emergency fund to cover you if your business has a rough time.

You said you are drowning in debt.
 

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Discussion Starter · #12 ·
re: Am I a piece of ****

Umm. I am kind of hung up on the fact you were trying to have sex with a 16 year old when you were 23.

Maybe you should count yourself lucky and get your head examined.
NO NO. I might have the times wrong but she was a freshman in college when I met her she had just started and had just graduated highschool. She is 6 or 7 years younger than me.
 

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Discussion Starter · #13 ·
re: Am I a piece of ****

You said in your other thread that you prefer to think women don't "do" stuff like have periods and poop.

What are you doing for your OCD and other issues? The ADD and bi-polar?

You are immature and you need to be dealing with your mental health issues with your dr.

You should plan vacations when your wife can go, not with your cousin.

You don't go on $10,000 worth of vacation if you don't have enough of an emergency fund to cover you if your business has a rough time.

You said you are drowning in debt.
I will be the first to admit I make quick decisions and when I get my mind set on something I just do it. A friend of mine in West Palm offered to let me stay at her hotel for just $60 a night. I couldn't pass it up so me and my cousin drove down there. This is not even a hotel like a resort. My cousin and I split everything. We stayed a week and I think it was less than $500. As for my business it runs itself but some things changed real fast when Trump came in and it sent my business into a downward spiral because all my employees are hispanic.

I had not been taking meds for years because it was all borderline that I needed to. I might have bi-polar but it may affect me once or twice out of the year. But over the last 5 years it has gotten worse and I have been on meds every since.

I am immature in some ways I would agree with that. I have no self control at all at times. I might see a bowling ball I want jump in the car and go get it. One day I came home with a Mustang. Just went out and bought it. Don't regret it either cause I love it but my wife didn't want me getting it. So yeah I have my own issues.

The vacations have been the worst thing. I don't like to plan vacations. Running my own business I can only go when things are running smooth. A few years ago we planned to go on a cruise. When it came time to go my business was a mess. We had employees calling in sick, the manager in the office quit and I had to go on a cruise that I didn't want to go on because I had stuff at work to take care of. So guess what. I went on the cruise, had a miserable time and at one point I really wanted to jump off that that ship.
 

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Discussion Starter · #14 ·
re: Am I a piece of ****

You said in your other thread that you prefer to think women don't "do" stuff like have periods and poop.

What are you doing for your OCD and other issues? The ADD and bi-polar?

You are immature and you need to be dealing with your mental health issues with your dr.

You should plan vacations when your wife can go, not with your cousin.

You don't go on $10,000 worth of vacation if you don't have enough of an emergency fund to cover you if your business has a rough time.

You said you are drowning in debt.
Yes I am drowning in debt this year. But this is just part of owning businesses. I can take a minor hit here and there but loosing employees, no amount of money can fix that problem.
 

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re: Am I a piece of ****

I was no in debt when I went on Vacation 2 times at the beginning of the year. I am self employed and we had a major setback about 4 months ago that put me in debt. I took my mom and daughter on the first vacation and my cousin on the second one. I can't help it if she can't get off work. I am not supposed to go do anything because she has to work?
Why can't you plan vacations when she does get time off from work?

Stop hanging out with couples that don't like my wife: Well this started in church first. People would invite us over and I would connect great with the husband but my wife could never connect with the wife or wives. Then she joined some mother groups and that didn't work out. She has tried a lot of things and just can not connect with people on that level. I think she either tries to hard or comes off as a dork I don't know. As for the drinking and smoking I was only saying that she is a goody goody. She has gotten much better with this though over the past few years and at least will drink and have a good time but that is not always a good thing either.
You clearly do not really like your wife.

I personally don't think I am acting like a child and asking you to put up your pads. What if I wiped my ass everyday and put it in the trash instead of the toilet. Would you look in the trash and say I love my husband he is so cute. I know it is normal for women but I also know that for myself I can't stand it and just want you to put at least a lid on it. So when I am in the small water closet I don't feel like I am breathing in vagina. I mean because it does smell whether you know it or not. Our bathroom is huge but the water closet is so small and it stinks.
I am 100% with you on the dirty female hygiene products. Not property throwing them away is unacceptable.

I
don't spend time with her because she boring to me and always bringing her family along. Her family is very toxic. There so toxic I can't even put it on here.
Basically, you don’t really like your wife. That’s the bottom line. What did the two of you do together before, when you thought you were in-love with her?

The trick is to find one or two things that the two of you enjoy and do them together. For example the two of you lean to scuba dive. Then go on scuba diving trips together. I have friends who did this. They have great vacations together every year to go diving. Or take dancing classes together and do that. Just find something, learn it together and make it part of your life.

I never wanted kids. Took me 8 years till I decided to just give in because it was not fair for me to hold out on her when she loves kids so much. My daughter is the best thing that happened to me. I watch her when she sick if I can but I run 2 business. I can't just call in sick to work. I have asked her to find someone that she can call if our daughter is sick but she never does it. Instead just gets upset when I can't get off work or her dad has to watch her.
Why don’t you find someone to help take care of your daughter when she is sick? Why does your wife have to do this? She’s your daughter too.
 

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re: Am I a piece of ****

OP, your threads sound a little like mine. Read mine. I got some good advice, put it into action and things are quickly working themselves out for us, :).

First of all, I don't think you're an ******* at all. I think you're at a stage in your marriage and in your life in which you don't like certain things the way they are anymore. You're looking for some change... Some evolution... It's OK to want her to be tidier and more motivated and more social. None of your requests are out of this world, BUT you have to keep in mind that this is who she is. You married her like this. If it was good enough for you then odds are it can be good enough for you again, :). However, I think you're well within your rights to ask her to change or at least try to change some things. As your partner she should be more than willing to make the effort. You have to tell her that you need her to make the effort, however. Make it clear you're not expecting her to be a Stepford Wife, BUT you'd probably find her more attractive as a woman if she became a bit more domestic. You can also tell you do not like hearing it's ovulation time before sex... It's OK if that makes it seem more like business than pleasure to you, but odds are she's not approaching it as such. She's probably looking forward to sleeping with you and is choosing her words poorly.

The social situation hits close to home. I vocalized with my husband MONTHS ago that I would like him to be more pro active concerning his social life. I told him I think it'd be better if he spent less time with his family and more time with friends. For months, nothing happened. I ended up needing to have a very serious conversation with him about it. I just told him it's hard for me to be attracted to a man who only has his father as his friend. It makes me feel isolated and old and I don't want to live like this. He took the hint and he's made a serious effort to connect with old friends. We've gone out with mine all together and it's been a blast. Getting him to do this was hard and there were times I genuinely wondered if we were compatible because I wanted to go out and he wanted to visit his father. He loves me so he made the effort. Your wife WILL do the same. She just has to KNOW how important it is to you.
 

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re: Am I a piece of ****

I will be the first to admit I make quick decisions and when I get my mind set on something I just do it. A friend of mine in West Palm offered to let me stay at her hotel for just $60 a night. I couldn't pass it up so me and my cousin drove down there. This is not even a hotel like a resort. My cousin and I split everything. We stayed a week and I think it was less than $500. As for my business it runs itself
You could go on two vacations because your business runs itself. But you cannot take care of your daughter when she’s sick because you have to go to work and run two business???????? Really?????????? These two things cannot be true. One or the other is not the truth.

As for my business it runs itself but some things changed real fast when Trump came in and it sent my business into a downward spiral because all my employees are Hispanic.
Why do you have only Hispanic employees? Do you discriminate against non-Hispanics? Or do you under pay and can only get illegal immigrants to work for you? This is not cool.

Also, most Hispanics in the USA are not illegal immigrants, so if you are hiring only illegals, their race/ethnicity is not relevant. Their legal status is the relevant issue.

Plus, deportations are actually down under Trump, so I wonder why him being president has hurt your business.
I had not been taking meds for years because it was all borderline that I needed to. I might have bi-polar but it may affect me once or twice out of the year. But over the last 5 years it has gotten worse and I have been on meds every since.
Ok

I am immature in some ways I would agree with that. I have no self control at all at times. I might see a bowling ball I want jump in the car and go get it. One day I came home with a Mustang. Just went out and bought it. Don't regret it either cause I love it but my wife didn't want me getting it. So yeah I have my own issues.
Yes, you do have issues. Buying something like a Mustang without working that out with your wife is completely unacceptable.

Here is something for you to read: The Policy of Joint Agreement

The vacations have been the worst thing. I don't like to plan vacations. Running my own business I can only go when things are running smooth. A few years ago, we planned to go on a cruise. When it came time to go my business was a mess. We had employees calling in sick, the manager in the office quit and I had to go on a cruise that I didn't want to go on because I had stuff at work to take care of. So guess what. I went on the cruise, had a miserable time and at one point I really wanted to jump off that that ship.
So you plan your business so that you can handle time with your wife, to include vacations. If you cannot do that, you are not good at management and should not have a business. That probably is part of the issue with your company now having financial difficulties.
 

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Discussion Starter · #18 ·
re: Am I a piece of ****

OP, your threads sound a little like mine. Read mine. I got some good advice, put it into action and things are quickly working themselves out for us, :).

First of all, I don't think you're an ******* at all. I think you're at a stage in your marriage and in your life in which you don't like certain things the way they are anymore. You're looking for some change... Some evolution... It's OK to want her to be tidier and more motivated and more social. None of your requests are out of this world, BUT you have to keep in mind that this is who she is. You married her like this. If it was good enough for you then odds are it can be good enough for you again, :). However, I think you're well within your rights to ask her to change or at least try to change some things. As your partner she should be more than willing to make the effort. You have to tell her that you need her to make the effort, however. Make it clear you're not expecting her to be a Stepford Wife, BUT you'd probably find her more attractive as a woman if she became a bit more domestic. You can also tell you do not like hearing it's ovulation time before sex... It's OK if that makes it seem more like business than pleasure to you, but odds are she's not approaching it as such. She's probably looking forward to sleeping with you and is choosing her words poorly.

The social situation hits close to home. I vocalized with my husband MONTHS ago that I would like him to be more pro active concerning his social life. I told him I think it'd be better if he spent less time with his family and more time with friends. For months, nothing happened. I ended up needing to have a very serious conversation with him about it. I just told him it's hard for me to be attracted to a man who only has his father as his friend. It makes me feel isolated and old and I don't want to live like this. He took the hint and he's made a serious effort to connect with old friends. We've gone out with mine all together and it's been a blast. Getting him to do this was hard and there were times I genuinely wondered if we were compatible because I wanted to go out and he wanted to visit his father. He loves me so he made the effort. Your wife WILL do the same. She just has to KNOW how important it is to you.
Great advice in here so I will answer some of it. When I met her and now looking back I think I may have married someone that I could bring home to my parents and that is exactly what I got. My dad was a cop, my mom and both are marriage counselors and do missionary work. They have been married for 43 years.

Before I met my wife I was picking up girls at the bars and clubs. Sleeping with every girl I met and having a blast. But they were not girls I would bring home to my parents and none of them I dated lasted longer than about 6 months to a year till I married my wife. Sadly my wife married me I think because I am like her dad. Outgoing, have a motorcycle, like mustangs etc.

I have tried to get my wife to get friends but it does not work. I feel so sorry for her when she tries and it does not work. She went with some girls from her work. They left her at a bar on St Patties day drunk as can be and someone found her in the grass passed out and I had to go get her and didn't know if she had been raped or what. People just don't socially flock to my wife. She tired doing the painting thing with people to make friends and that didn't work. I don't know what else to do. I am glad your man made the effort but what do you do when that effort does not work?

On a funny but not funny. When we first started trying to have kids she would be like ok I got the preseed. All I have to do is put it in here and then put it in there. I am sitting their naked thinking OMG what the hell is going on and what the hell is preseed. Now I know what all that stuff is.

But it is really just the wrong time for any of this. I just put my dog down of 15 years and I think I love my dog more than my wife and she comes to me this morning wanting to make a baby and I am like I would give my right arm to have my dog back. We are just in different places all the way around.
 

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re: Am I a piece of ****

It'd be easier if you had both in one thread instead of 2 but I think you know you aren't the husband your wife deserves, you loved the dog more than her. She bores you so much you can't even watch a movie with her.

Let her go while she still had baby making years left if she wants more kids.

Also, in your other thread you mentioned bringing up gross vagina stuff because your co-worker talked about giving oral. I really, really hope you are not the kind of guy who doesn't go down on a woman cause it's "gross"

For real, I'd tell her to divorce over just that.
 

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re: Am I a piece of ****

It'd be easier if you had both in one thread instead of 2 but I think you know you aren't the husband your wife deserves, you loved the dog more than her. She bores you so much you can't even watch a movie with her.

Let her go while she still had baby making years left if she wants more kids.

Also, in your other thread you mentioned bringing up gross vagina stuff because your co-worker talked about giving oral. I really, really hope you are not the kind of guy who doesn't go down on a woman cause it's "gross"

For real, I'd tell her to divorce over just that.
Unfortunately, TAM is acting up today and I cannot find his other threads. If what you say here is true, and its sounding more and more like it with this replies on this thread..... I would agree that he should just end the marriage.

Can someone post the like to his other thread because search is not working for me today.
 
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