Talk About Marriage banner

1 - 2 of 2 Posts

·
Registered
Joined
·
1 Posts
Discussion Starter #1
I have a bit of a problem... I am currently living with my boyfriend of 1 year 4 months and we get along perfectly well. I love him very much and he is a very caring man. His family consists of his father, mother, 13 yr old sister. my boyfriend works from his parents home and gets his wages from his father. He is very close to his mother and sister, that I think they are obsessed with him. He's 28 years old and Before he moved out his father made us an offer to stay to live in the basement of their big house instead of moving to my place. He even offered to pay our bills etc... Sounded like a great offer, as I could rent my place etcc.. more money in my hands but I disagreed, I knew it would be bad for our relationship, and after a few weeks of talking about this, my boyfriend agreed with me, so we moved out.

Even though he goes to his family's house everyday of the week, we make it a point to go together to visit them over the weekend for a few hours, but lately its stretching to almost 7 hours or so when we go visit and leaves us with almost no time for us as we are busy with our chores (mind you visiting means we end up talking and playing with his sister and the parents leave and do other things). We discussed that and he agreed with me. There's a gap of 15 yrs between his sister and him and he pratictally raised her and I know he loves her very much. His father offers us to go on holiday with them (which he pays) as a family (so that we keep her company) which I dont think is fair on us. My boyfriend knows that, but doesnt mind it. we havent even been away on holiday alone yet because we have been going on holiday with his family,Today he asked me whether I wanted to go on a padi course in scuba diving, but he only asked me because his sister wants to go. I love this man very much, hes a dream come true to me but Im scared of all this, I sometimes feel like I come second to his family, although I know he loves me. Last year I wanted to go for a few days to Prague for new years and we didnt go cos we would have left a day before his mother's bday (30th dec). I cannot even plan anything for his bday as they always want to spend the day with him and i feel like im being a ***** if I do. Its his 30th soon and dont know whether i should surprise him with a holiday or not.

I am confused...... Should he start prioritising more our relationship or am i being selfish?
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1 Posts
It sounds like you need more time for yourself. I would definately voice my concerns with him. Let him know how you feel about this.
 
1 - 2 of 2 Posts
Top