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I have been married for 15 years, have 2 teenage kids, dog, house...
About 4 years ago my wife got her nursing degree and began working at a hospital. She was a stay at home mom. I knew it would be a different experience for her and was excited for this new phase. Her circle of friends grew and she began to lose contact with old friends. I have always been very trusting and allowed her to move freely in this new space. All this eventually led to an affair with a co-worker of hers.
I had the feeling some of her stories weren't adding up. She was bringing her phone into the bathroom, having girls night sleepovers... all the warning signs. I checked the cell phone records and called the number and sure enough. Guy.
After I found out, I confronted her and she confessed. After much thought, we agreed to work it out. During the next couple months I caught her with 2nd cell phone, busted her driving to a company lunch together and was finally DONE. I used the word divorce. She told so many lies it amazed me and I don't believe she told me everything.
That seemed to move the situation. She stopped the suspicious behavior, I made changes to the routine to make her happy. We seemed to have turned a corner.
Over the last few months I felt something wasn't right. Then yesterday she suddenly said she was going to study for a test to stay certified. Said her friends kids were gone so she was going over there. I checked the cell records and a strange number was there just before she left. I called the number this morning and asked who it was... same guy.
Of course she is saying she was studying and in those text messages she was telling him to go away.
I know I don't believe her. I guess bottom line is, does it matter what she says? Should I even listen to her or just move to divorce.
 

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Expose the affair to family and friends if the om has a gf or wife let her know asap! And file for divorce.
 

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Everyone here is going to say its obvious that she isn't going to stop and you should just file for divorce.

I know that's easier said than done, you have to do what is going to make you happy. In all honesty....until you put your foot down and close the door on her she's going to keep doing it. Tell her you don't believe her and will be talking to a lawyer, if she whimpers and whines about it...let her. Don't buckle.....Be strong for as long as it takes and see what actions she takes. Who cares what she says...its what she does that speaks volumes!
 

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For me, my wife has ONE CHANCE. Even that I'm unsure of. If I found out she was back with OM in ANY capacity, I'd kick her ass out the door so fast she'd probably leave a chunk of it in the doorway.

Fool me once...

Toss her ass out my friend.
 

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Just watch out for YOU. Your emotional and mental well being are priority number one. Do you really believe you can trust her again? I am working at R with my WW. And I don't know the answer to that question. But if she even farts in the wrong direction, I'll bolt like a Vegan in a butcher shop.
 

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Make sure to separate finances and cancel any joint credit cards. If she goes out again all night pack her stuff in black garbage bags and leave them by the front door. I think she will get the message you are serious.
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I would suggest that you get tested for STD's and contact an attorney now to understand your options. You gave her the gift of forgiveness and she threw it back in your face. If the roles were reversed would she have so forgiving and accepting as you?

You judge a person by their actions and not by their words and her actions speak volumes. She has no respect for you and considers you a fool that she can easily manipulate. If you do not respect yourself then who will? Good luck.
 

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She is gone, gone, gone my friend.

It takes a lot of brass to buy a burner phone and look you in the eyes and tell lie after lie. Since you've kept taking her back time after time - she has completely dismissed you as a husband.

Oh, she wants you at the house. She wants the comfort of her home, her kids full time, her standard of living in tact. But whatever she saw in you way back when - she now sees in spades with the other guy.

She will tell you whatever you WANT to hear. And face it, you do WANT, if not NEED to hear the words. But, it's her actions that speak the truth. Can you see it? Everyone else does.

I'll bet there's a whole group of her co-workers who are egging her on and praising her new-found 'freedom'. Unless she gives up that job, and shows a willingness to rejoin the marriage she will continue to be gone, gone, gone. Even as she sleeps in your bed most nights.
 

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It depends how much you want her in your life, I suppose.

What about the children?

Is the OM married, too? Can you expose him?

Complain to the hospital?

What kind of divorce would you go for?
 

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Go see a lawyer to find out what your right and responsibilities are in case of divorce. The first visit should be free - but even if you have to pay it will be worth it.

After you know your legal rights do this:

Tell your wife you will file for divorce unless she commits to the marriage. She can do what she wants but there will be consequences. If she wants to commit then she must:

1. Write down in a spiral notebook all that she has done - everything. No exceptions - any omission is a sign of non-commitment and ground for proceeding with divorce.

2. She takes and pays for a polygraph to ensure that what she has written is true. The whole truth. No omissions.

3. She writes a No-contact letter to the OM (or OMs) that she shows you for your approval. The letter just says that she harmed your marriage - he should not contact her ever again by any means. Any violation will be shown to you and you may seek legal action if he does. YOU mail the note or send the email.

4. She deletes all secret email accts - but shows them to you first. She deletes all means of contact with EVERYONE but family. No exceptions. She also gives you passwords to all remaining accts and phone.

5. She tells you who else knew or supported her affairs.

6. She quits her job and finds another immediately. No excuses.

7. She arranges for IC - you need IC too.

8. You might want to schedule MC with a counselor experienced with infidelity in marriage. Don't just go to any MC - some are actually toxic to marriages.

Can you do this?
 

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It could be that the affair never ended. That's my guess, it never really was completely over.

We see this so much, I post this at least once a week. Cheaters follow a pretty predictable script. They cheat, they lie, they get caught, they deny, they tell you only what you can actually prove, their story doesn't make sense, as you poke holes in it, a little more truth comes out a little at a time. They are in a fantasy love affair that involves only fun and sex and good times - no chores, no troubled finances, no screaming kids, no cleaning the house. They have the butterflies in the stomach, everything the other man says is funny or brilliant, while everything you say is petty or annoying.

The main characteristic of the cheater is lying. If their lips are moving ... Assume everything she tells you is a lie, unless it is backed up by verifiable proof or supported by her actions.

In order to find out where you stand, you will have to do a little investigating.

Check the phone bill. Look at how often they text. Even though they work together, it is likely they text each other often during the day. This could be useful info in breaking up the affair. They also probably text each other first thing every morning and last thing every night.

Buy a couple voice-activated recorders and some heavy-duty velcro. Put one in the house where she is likely to talk on the phone when you are not around and the other under the front seat of her car.

Assume the following is true unless you find out definitively otherwise:

1. Your wife and other man have told each other they are soul mates and destined to be together. They regularly have sex at work, on breaks, in the car at lunch.

2. Your wife and other man would be together already if not for their kids and their jobs and their reputations. Maybe other man is not ready to leave his wife yet and is stringing your wife along.

3. They are making plans to be together. They have pledged "not to give up on each other" or some such. They are in contact every single day - the first thing they do each morning and the last thing they do each night is contact each other.

When you confronted your wife originally about this situation, you did not take the steps needed to break up the affair. She SAID she wanted to work on the marriage. What she did was continue the affair. THAT is what we are talking about when we say watch the actions, not the words. By the way, your trying to be a better husband, changing the routine, had zero effect on her and her feelings toward other man. It did not cause her to continue the affair and nor did it cause her to end it. No matter how you acted, you only were a bystander as she fantasized about her perfect life with other man.

Your marriage MAY be salvageable. It may not.

Your story is not unique. Your wife is not unique. You are not unique. Your situation is very common. There always are a few variables, but nothing significantly different. Cheaters follow a very predictable script. Betrayed spouses also follow the script. The plot outline could take one of a few courses, like bad TV movies. You and your wife both are following the script to a T.

Your wife is "fence-sitting" and "eating cake." She "loves you but is not 'in love' with you." She is "in love" with the other man. This will run its course on its own. In about a year, or two, maybe at longest three. That's how long it takes to get over the "in love" feeling, which eventually turns into the kind of love you and your wife have for each other, the more mature settled kind of love, not the exciting, not-knowing-what's-going-to-happen-next, butterfly-in-the-stomach love. After the "in love" feeling wears off, your wife may stay with the other man out of habit for a year or a few more. Then she will contact you via Facebook, remembering only the good times, and want to reunite with you. If she doesn't meet anyone else in between. So, if you follow your current course, you might have your wife back in 7-10 years or so.

Your wife wants the safety of you at home and the excitement of her new lover. She's not going to give up either unless you force her to (or unless the other man gets hit by a bus, struck by lightning, finds someone else, or otherwise dumps her).

You can wait until hell freezes over and it still won't be enough time for your wife to decide to stay with you. The only way you are going to save your marriage is to end the affair. That is the first step and no guarantee that you can save your marriage.

Your wife is "in love" with the other man, which means she is infatuated, gets butterflies in the stomach, like a teenager with a crush. Her "affair" with the other man is pure fantasy-land; none of the harsh realities of life intrudes. In her affair with him, she does not have to pick up his dirty underwear off the floor, do laundry, cook, clean, or deal with any of life's unpleasantness. With him, there is only I love you's, sex, and talk of living in a perfect fantasy world together. Of course, no such perfect fantasy world awaits your wife, and somewhere deep down she knows that, but a big part of her wants to believe in that fantasy, just like you want to believe that she will come to her senses on her own. She won't.

Right now, she likes the fact that she can still have her other man knowing you will be there as a backup in case it falls through. She is sitting on the fence eating cake.

There is a reason she hasn't left you for him - what is it? The kids? The job? Other man's hesitance to leave his wife and family? If she is in love with him and they are soulmates destined to be together, why hasn't she left you for him yet?

Your first step is to talk to your wife. Get her alone without the kids around. Tell her that you love her and are sorry for whatever legitimate gripes she has against you, that you will improve yourself and improve your marriage, that you feel your marriage will be better than ever if you try to reconcile. Next, tell her that although you feel this way, you cannot go on this way any longer with her cheating on you. Give her a very short time to decide. An hour is not too short; at most, give her one day to decide. Tell her no decision means she chooses other man. Tell her you took vows together, you've been married many years, have had children together, and have been through life's ups and downs together and you don't plan on waiting any longer as her "backup plan" while she continues her affair with the other man.

If your wife does choose to commit to the marriage, she agrees to give up all contact with the other man now and forever, handwrite a no contact letter to the other man, quit her job, tell you the full truth of her affair, and give you complete transparency of all her communication devices and accounts. If she can't agree to this, file for divorce. Don't threaten it, just do it.

Divorce is a long process. You can always stop it if your wife comes to her senses. If not, you save yourself months and months of pain and unhappiness, which ends in a bad result anyway.

If your wife does not want to meet your conditions and work on the marriage, start moving on with your life. Stop engaging with her as your wife, and start engaging with her as your soon-to-be-ex-wife. Be pleasant, but not romantic. Talk to her only as needed to discuss the divorce settlement. If you are financing her affair in any way, stop. Definitely don't pay for any means she uses to cheat on you.

Also, if she doesn't choose to re-commit to the marriage right away, expose the affair to the other man's family and friends. Expose the affair to you and your wife's family and friends. Let them know the other man's name and ask for their support in saving your family and your marriage. Don't tell your wife you are going to do this, just do it. Expose the affair to their human resources, let the hospital know that they have been using company time to carry on their texting affair (assuming the phone bills show this is the case).

If you want to save your marriage, you have to be willing to lose it. You cannot "nice" your wife out of her affair.

The longer you allow this to go on, the more respect your wife is losing for you. She sees a weak-willed man who is not willing to stand up for himself. When she sees the other man, she sees a strong man who goes after what he wants and doesn't stop until he gets it. Other man may be belittling you to your wife every chance he gets. And if so she likely is listening to it and not disputing it. If the situation were reversed, do you think she would tolerate it?
 

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I have been married for 15 years, have 2 teenage kids, dog, house...
About 4 years ago my wife got her nursing degree and began working at a hospital. She was a stay at home mom. I knew it would be a different experience for her and was excited for this new phase. Her circle of friends grew and she began to lose contact with old friends. I have always been very trusting and allowed her to move freely in this new space. All this eventually led to an affair with a co-worker of hers.
I had the feeling some of her stories weren't adding up. She was bringing her phone into the bathroom, having girls night sleepovers... all the warning signs. I checked the cell phone records and called the number and sure enough. Guy.
After I found out, I confronted her and she confessed. After much thought, we agreed to work it out. During the next couple months I caught her with 2nd cell phone, busted her driving to a company lunch together and was finally DONE. I used the word divorce. She told so many lies it amazed me and I don't believe she told me everything.
That seemed to move the situation. She stopped the suspicious behavior, I made changes to the routine to make her happy. We seemed to have turned a corner.
Over the last few months I felt something wasn't right. Then yesterday she suddenly said she was going to study for a test to stay certified. Said her friends kids were gone so she was going over there. I checked the cell records and a strange number was there just before she left. I called the number this morning and asked who it was... same guy.
Of course she is saying she was studying and in those text messages she was telling him to go away.
I know I don't believe her. I guess bottom line is, does it matter what she says? Should I even listen to her or just move to divorce.
Trust me...DO NOT believe a single word she tells you unless you can verify it yourself...
 

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Here is another point of view, somewhat similar:

I wish I could claim credit for this masterpiece but I can't. It belongs to very wise member from another website. It should be etched in the minds of every man and woman who has been the victim on infidelity.

Just Let Them Go

The end result?

The end result is to respect yourself in the end,
let go of the people that don't value you or respect you.

That is the end result.

The quickest way to get a cheating spouse back is to let them go with a smile on your face wishing them the best in life and hoping that everything works out in their relationship with their affair partner.

Seriously, the quickest way to get them back.

Nothing else works better or quicker.

Let them go.

Agree with them and their feelings,
"you should be with the OM, I hope he makes you happy, good bye"

Wouldn't that be true love?

If you really loved your spouse,
and wanted them to have what they really want in life which is the other person they're in love with,
wouldn't letting them go be the approach if you really love them?

Why focus on the affair or the drama associated with it?
Just let them go. Give them their freedom.

You can take a good hard look at yourself in the mirror everyday and improve yourself but do it for you, not for someone else, the changes will never stick when it's done for someone else, do it for your benefit and you will probably make those changes last much longer if not indefinitely - because it's for your benefit and you realize the importance and value in that benefit because YOU are involved.

I will never tell someone to change to entice a WAW back when she's been cheating on him. I don't care how bad a marriage, there is never an excuse for cheating. That is a personal decision that someone makes to cheat on their spouse. If a marriage is really bad, leave, get a divorce, speak up to your spouse and tell them flat out "this marriage sucks and if things don't change I'm going to leave you and find someone better" and if things don't improve, leave that person.

But cheating, no excuses.

Think about cheating.
A wayward spouse who cheats on their spouse goes behind their back, secretly, telling lies, feeling guilty, getting angry at their spouse for getting in the way of their fantasies but never owning up to their actions, never admitting what they're doing. If a person who cheats on their spouse felt justified in their actions, why hide and go behind their spouses backs when they start cheating, why lie, why make up excuses about late nights at work and going to a friends place and sleeping over because they drank too much and any other such nonsense?

Deep down, the cheating spouse knows there is something inherently wrong with their actions otherwise they wouldn't lie about their actions and hide what they're doing.

Fighting the affair? For what reason?
To compete with the OM or OW for your spouse?
What message does that communicate to your wayward spouse?
They have lots of value and you have none because now you have to compete with another person for their love? Competing with your wayward spouse's affair partner never works, it just prolongs an ugly drama filled process.

And for your last point,
The easiest way to show you will not tolerate cheating in your relationship is to let that person go. That is the easiest and most effective way to show this.

"Look wife/husband, I won't be in an open relationship with you, I won't give you X number of days, weeks, months to make your mind, if you really feel like you need to sit on the fence on this decision and can't decide between your affair partner and me well I will make the decision for you, you can be with them because I'm no longer an option. I love you and wish you a good life with them and hope it works out for you because it didn't work out for us. Now the best thing we can do for each other is to make this process as graceful and peaceful as possible for us and our children, I'll contact a lawyer/mediator and get started on the process of our legal separation/divorce."

You give them what they want.
You don't fight them on this issue.
You agree with their feelings,
they want to be with the other person, fine they should be with the other person, let them be with the other person.

You will never convince a person to change their feelings with your arguments and logic. You can not find one member on this website in a situation where they are dealing with infidelity where they got their spouse to change their mind about how they feel about their affair partner.

You can't say "don't love them, love me instead",
you can't say "look at me, I'm better in every way compared to your affair partner, pick me instead of them",
you can't say "you took marriage vows, you promised to love me"

I agree, you don't have to make it easy for your wayward spouse to have an affair, but when you let them go, "lovingly detach", you don't have to worry about making it easy for them. It's no longer your concern, they can have you or them but not both and not at the same time and since they've chosen to have an affair, they've made their choice, there is no profit in fighting that decision. Let them go and move on with your life, that is the quickest, easiest way to get them back.

You definitely don't support them financially and enable them, that would be weak, wussy, clingy, insecure behavior - something in you telling you that you need to support them financially while they're having an affair, hoping they'll realize how nice you are and come back to you.

Just let them go, have them move out or you move out and live a good life without them.
 

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You cannot have her work at the same hospital as her affair partner (AP). She must change jobs. It may mean giving up her other friends at the hospital, but that is a good thing for your marraige as they probably are better friends with the AP than with you and are thus toxic friends to your marraige. She may not like it, but that is the price that she must pay for her cheating. Do not let her blame you for this demand because, had she not cheated, there would be no such demand; it is all on her. There is a big time shortage of nurses so changing jobs is a real option.

She must decide, you and the marraige or the AP and the job. Truth be told changing jobs is a common thing that people usually do many times in there lives, while marraige is suppose to be the lifetime commitment. Lets face it. If she got a job offer from another employer with a big pay raise, she would think about taking it. Are you and the marriage not worth more than such a raise? If she does not pick you and the marriage, then she is not committed enough to you to be your wife long term.

She may try to call your bluff so be ready to see an attorney and to file and mean it. If she later wants to really commit to you, and you decide to take her back, you can always stop the divorce. Good luck to you. You do not deserve this.
 

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During the next couple months I caught her with 2nd cell phone, busted her driving to a company lunch together and was finally DONE. I used the word divorce. She told so many lies it amazed me and I don't believe she told me everything.
That seemed to move the situation. She stopped the suspicious behavior, I made changes to the routine to make her happy. We seemed to have turned a corner.
Over the last few months I felt something wasn't right. Then yesterday she suddenly said she was going to study for a test to stay certified. Said her friends kids were gone so she was going over there. I checked the cell records and a strange number was there just before she left. I called the number this morning and asked who it was... same guy.
Of course she is saying she was studying and in those text messages she was telling him to go away.
She's lying, she restarted the affair, this asuming she ever ended it instead of improved at hiding it... only last day she relaxed and got lazy with the excuses.
Ther's no way to stop an EA-PA when you work with OM. No way. Even less when toxic friends are enabling and covering for them.
No matter how, It's a full false R, she went underground.

Sorry man. She's gone. She doesn't give a sh!t about you anymore.
This time don't tell a word, talk to a lawyer, yesterday, find out where you stand, start the divorce.
Ans start detaching from her, start implementing, living the 180. Stop engaging with her except for the day to day necesitties.
 

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So sorry you're here. Read this and let us know if you're up for it. Complete nuclear exposure is your best bet to save your marriage. You can still walk if you so choose afterwards, but I would start here.

MelodyLane from Marriage Builders said:
[size:14pt]Exposure 101 [/size]

Exposure is simply your most powerful weapon against an affair. Affairs thrive on secrecy, so exposure can be ruinous. Exposure is no guarantee, but it is your best bet at killing the affair and making it possible to save your marriage. YES, we know your spouse will be furious, but the goal is to save your marriage, not to avoid your wayward spouse's anger at all cost. Your marriage can survive his/her temporary anger; it cannot survive an ongoing affair. Read up on why exposure is so effective: When Should an Affair Be Exposed?

Dr. Bill Harley said:
"Exposure is very likely to end the affair, lifting the fog that has overcome the unfaithful spouse, helping him or her become truly repentant and willing to put energy and effort into a full marital recovery.[color:#FF0000] In my experience with thousands of couples who struggle with the fallout of infidelity, exposure has been the single most important first step toward recovery.[/color] It not only helps end the affair, but it also provides support to the betrayed spouse, giving him or her stamina to hold out for ultimate recovery."
Dr Bill Harley said:
"The reason for the wide exposure is not to hurt the unfaithful spouse, but rather to end the fantasy. Your husband's secret second life made his affair possible, and the more you can to to make it public, the easier it is for him to see the damage he's doing. Keeping it secret does damage, but few know about it. Making it public helps everyone, including the unfaithful spouse and lover, see the affair for what it really is."
Dr Harley tells a betrayed husband he is an "enabler" for not exposing his wife's affair: radio clip

Dr Harley tells BTinTrouble to "expose the heck out of his wife's affair" [exposure saved their marriage, btw] radio clip here

Exposure targets
Parents of all concerned, family, close friends, children of the BS, workplace [if a workplace affair], spouse of the affair partner, pastor. Facebook friends of affair partner.

Exposure Timing
Exposure should be done immediately. The longer you wait, the more entrenched the affair becomes. There is never any “perfect” time to expose, so don’t delay while looking for an imaginary perfect time.

Expose on the SAME DAY – or as close as possible – in order to achieve a tsunami effect. The affairees should be completely taken by surprise. Doing this creates a powerful hit on the affair and prevents the affairees from pre-empting you

Exposure Tactics

Spouse of affair partner- Give your full name, phone # and email address. Tell the other BS all about the affair, offer to share all evidence with him/her. Offer to follow up to ensure that contact is truly ended and ask the other BS to do the same. The other BS will be shocked when you tell him, so be sure and give your email address and phone # for follow up questions. ALWAYS GIVE THE OTHER BS YOUR WS'S PHONE # IN CASE HE/SHE WANTS TO CALL.

Parents, close family, friends – Tell them about the affair, giving them names, general timelines, etc. Explain you are attempting to save your marriage and would be willing to forgive your WS if he/she ended the affair. Ask them to use their influence to persuade the WS to end her affair. A way to save time is to call both sets of parents and send an email to the other close family and friends. Template letter posted below

Parents of affair partner. Give your full name and explain why you are calling. Ask them to use their influence with their son/daughter to persuade them to leave your spouse alone. It might also help if the PARENT of the WS calls them too.

Workplace exposure: Expose to Director of Human Resources, a key VP and both of the affairee’s supervisors using the template letter posted below.

Facebook exposure: Should be done to the affair partner’s facebook friends via private message. This is a very, very effective exposure because it is a collection of the AP’s closest friends and family. SPACE THE PM’S OUT 60 SECONDS APART SO FB DOES NOT SHUT YOU DOWN FOR FLOODING. Before you begin, copy and paste all the contacts into a WORD doc. Change your fb picture to a picture of you and your spouse and children. Template letters posted below.

The Fallout
Expect your spouse to be FURIOUS and to make all manner of threats, “I was going to work on the marriage, now I am not!!” “I cannot trust you” “You have to pack and leave!!” “You have ruined any chance you had!!” Do not let this bother you!! Just imagine that you have taken the crackpipe away from the crack head. Of course they are angry. But it will blow over. Don’t laugh, don’t fight, don't attempt to reason with them, and most of all, don’t be SCARED! Your marriage can survive some temporary anger, it cannot survive an ongoing affair! The madder your WS, the harder you hit the target!

The goal is to save your marriage, NOT to avoid your wayward spouse's anger at all costs.

Just say, "I am so sorry you are upset.. Can I get you a potato chip?" :)

Common Exposure Mistakes

Telling the WS that you got the idea to expose on the internet rather than taking ownership of your actions. Then the discussion becomes “who???” When the WS is told it was Marriage Builders, the WS is forever jaundiced against Marriage Builders, which harms future recovery chances. You need to OWN IT. Saying somebody told you to do it does not work for 5 year olds and it won’t work for you!

Keeping exposure a secret. Yes, you read right. But we have had exposure targets say “ok, I will keep this a secret!!” And they never tell the WS they know. That defeats the entire purpose. If that person won’t help you by speaking to your WS, at least TELL the WS that person knows.

Doing trickle exposures. Meaning exposing to just a few people but not to everyone that could have an influence. Trickle exposures are a disaster because they are not enough to kill the affair but just enough to infuriate the WS enough to come after the BS. So the exposure essentially only served to beat down the already beaten BS for no benefit.

Eliminating exposure targets because that person “has no influence over my WS” even though this is a person with long history over the WS. Such as a mother or father. Such targets cannot be dismissed on such a subjective basis because the BS CANNOT PREDICT WHO WILL OR WON’T HAVE AN INFLUENCE OVER THE WS. Sorry, but unless you are psychic and your name is Madame Cleo, you don’t know. Many WS are estranged from a parent, sibling, pastor but that is not a knock out factor.

Threatening to expose. Using exposure as a threat only serves to forewarn the affairees and cause them to go further underground. All you have achieved is to give the enemy your battle plan so they can come back and kick your rear tomorrow. It also gives them an opportunity to pre-empt you and tell others you are “crazy” “jealous”. Then then when you do expose no one will take you seriously. Threatening to expose is the equivalent of giving your battle plan to the enemy. Don't do that!

Deleting or throwing away evidence after the affair is killed. DO NOT DO THIS! You will need this in case the affair starts up again or if you get divorced. Yes, we know you don't want to be triggered. Fine. Then bag up the evidence and put it somewhere for safekeeping. Do not throw it away!
 

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Discussion Starter · #19 ·
Thank you all for reading and the replies... Wife is home now, denying everything...really did study, text was him trying to get back together, she was telling him no... feel like i'm being played...
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Thank you all for reading and the replies... Wife is home now, denying everything...really did study, text was him trying to get back together, she was telling him no... feel like i'm being played...
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Ask her to take a polygraph then if she has nothing to hide just sayin.
 
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