Sometimes it’s good to just vent. Your ex sounds like a grade A gigantic a hole. He abandoning your family so you can live a life of comfort and luxury is rather despicable. Hopefully you can take him for as much child support as you’re legally entitled to.
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@Strawberry1984 Why did he choose to separate? Is he cheating? Suffering from mental ill health?
I can understand why you are not demanding the correct child support, but... here's the thing. He should be paying what he owes to his children not to you, but to his children via you. In fact, many fathers pay more under those circumstances.
File for divorce, demand the correct amount of money for your children. After all, why should they go without while your former husband goes off and does **** knows what?
I can understand why you are not demanding the correct child support, but... here's the thing. He should be paying what he owes to his children not to you, but to his children via you. In fact, many fathers pay more under those circumstances.
File for divorce, demand the correct amount of money for your children. After all, why should they go without while your former husband goes off and does **** knows what?
I completely agree with you. He knows it himself; he knows how good I am with money/finances, that I don’t waste. I save. And all my money goes to the kids. I will say that he does pay for me as well when we go out together with the kids - he always takes the bill at restaurants, and he pays for my entrance (and the kids as well) when we go to amusement parks, cinema and other things. He also paid for a cleaning lady to come to my place in the past. But, the “issue” is that he’s not giving money freely (basically what he should be giving based on his big income AND based on how he’s spoiling himself).@Strawberry1984 Why did he choose to separate? Is he cheating? Suffering from mental ill health?
I can understand why you are not demanding the correct child support, but... here's the thing. He should be paying what he owes to his children not to you, but to his children via you. In fact, many fathers pay more under those circumstances.
File for divorce, demand the correct amount of money for your children. After all, why should they go without while your former husband goes off and does **** knows what?
I don’t know if I’m entitled to feel the way I do.
but I feel bitter. I see how he’s living his life, spending money, seeing the luxury clothes he’s wearing,buying himself the most expensive Italian designer interiors (on a discount he told me…but the prices are still rocket high!) Tye fact that I have our kids 24/7 is (in my perspective) wgat makes it possible for him to work as much as he does and earn the way he does. He doesn’t acknowledge that. In the contrary. He tell me that he’d be happy to have the kids more, but keeps them by me, to accommodate me cause he knows separation from the kids will be hard on me. That’s the half truth. But also a manipulative truth in my opinion. He also keeps them by me,because it’s by far much easier for him this way. He’s traveling every 2-3 weeks (for between 5-10 days every time)Whether it’s purely business (I doubt that) or also pleasure, is questionable, but nevertheless, he wouldn’t be able to do this, keep his 5 times a week training routine, working around the clock etc, if he had the kids. I feel like I’m the nanny (who isn’t even getting paid…) . Not to be misunderstood, I love my kids to death, and I love spending my life with them (although it’s super damn hard).
Hi
He did have employment overseas. He’s always been a hard working man. Striving to make financial success. When he moved to live in my country (my wish cause I wanted ti be close to my family) he/we were struggling big time financially and emotionally. He was upset and felt frustrated that he couldn’t get a job. He has a very good head on his shoulders. Super smart. But he aimed for high positions in major companies here, where he was lacking educational background (according to the job adds) yet, he could provide them with his experience on the market. When he was rejected he was sad and felt like giving up and moving with me to Toronto again, where he would have a much easier time getting a good paid job, becoming a business owner, cause of his connections there. We were basically living on my salary for quite a while, although he did contribute to buying food etc but the main was on me. And that was fully ok. We did have a marriage with a lot of arguments and fights, (never physical) and he did apply for divorce so many times. At the end my heart would start pounding (after we had a fight) and if I received a notification of an “official” letter waiting for me. I always assumed it was a application for a divorce from him.
I felt tons of insecurity, tons of resentment, and just tons of (well, in a way, it felt like emotional abuse) ALTHOUGH we DID have a lot of fights. For the longest time I didn’t feel that I was walking on safe ground.
I was very “alone” with the kids back then..he got to sleep in, to shower when he felt like, workout, etc. Me? I had to “schedule” it with him; “I’m gonna go in the shower now..can you watch the kids?” A lot of the times he would say that I had to wait to show as he was in the middle of replying to a mail or similar. I respected that, yet, I internally got upset by how he’s entering a shower (not asking anyone) vs how I did. And this is just one small example.
I do have friends left but very limited time go see them. In many ways he was thex man of my dreams. Although we are very different and although we argued a lot of the time (got much worse and much more frequent after having kids.
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